Playing around

LegacyUser

Hi, I've been meeting this guy who only wants to meet for casual sex. He is playing around with at least one other girl that I know of. It didn't bother me before until now. My feelings have been growing for him but I think he doesn't want anything serious. He phones me at all hours asking me to call & then if I do he won't make any contact for ages again. I know I should call a halt to meeting him when he wants to meet but I actually like him & I don't want to stop meeting him.

I'm confused as to whether I should ask him to chose but even as I write this I know I probably should just break contact but I just can't seem to. Has anyone here gone through this before & how did it turn out if you have?

Wagon

Delete the phone number. Delete all contact details and you won't be tempted to call him. Simple.

Here is the hard truth: He's using you for sex. He doesn't see you as anything else except as a vagina. Sounds harsh but it's pretty obvious from the way he acts. stop wasting your time on him and find yourself a good man who'll treat you well. They do exist You just need a bit of willpower on this one. Do it now or it'll get much harder down the line when you start developing much stronger feelings for him.

legend365

Yea i'd say drop him. He might realise what a great person you are after you give him the cold shoulder. Treat em mean, keep em keen kinda way.

Wagon wrote: »

Delete the phone number.

If you know it off by heart....drink until you forget

LegacyUser

My 2c worth...Why assume the guy is using her for sex, sounds like they're both using each for sex. She wants more, he doesn't. If shes not happy with the situation just end it.

LegacyUser

How old is he?

It sounds like you are in a f@@kbuddy situation and you have developed feelings.
I think it's uncalled for to question this guy's character. Most of us do engage in casual sex from time to time in between relationships. The trouble is, if you're one of those people who can't have casual sex and always develop feelings for the person you are being intimate with. If you're one of those, you should never get into these types of relationships.

I'm a female and I have a casual sex partner for the past year. I know he sees others and I do from time to time and it's great. I like having the freedom to go on dates and meet people and not having to go without sex because I'm single.

I do know, however, that if either he or I developed feelings for each other we'd have to end it immediately!! These things rarely develop into relationships. So if you're having feelings for him and feeling jealous in particular, you need to do yourself a favour and end it. You'll only end up getting really hurt. Tell him you're not interested in casual sex anymore and ask him not to contact you anymore. Then delete his number.

Good luck.

LegacyUser

Cut contact. It'll be hard initially but the longer you hang on, the stronger your feelings are going to grow and so the harder it'll be to get over him. In the long run, it would be much better if you do it now!

PCPhoto

just a quick question ...... OP ... do you contact him when you want sex ? or is he doing all the organising (ie. only looking for you when he's horny in which case you are only a piece of meat to him)

you obviously enjoy the sex - so why not give him a text/call to get sex when you want it..... treat him as he treats you (if he's unable/unwilling to be there when you want/need it then find someone who can)

if you want more from the situation - then you are getting emotionally involved and might need to find another lover....or BOB (Battery Operated Boyfriend)

AARRRGH

Talk to him about it before you cut contact. That way you'll know for sure where you stand, and you'll have acted like an adult...

LegacyUser

Thanks everyone who has replied so far, honestly.

Yeah being honest we are both using one another for casual sex. Since it started we have both initiated it but I have never actually phoned him 5-times-in-a-row at 4:30am for a booty-call though. I have only done it when we have met on nights out.

I did actually ask him to delete my number before but he came back with apologies & we have met several times since but we never actually speak about what either of us what out of it (we are just having fun & experimenting).

The more I read & post here the more distant I am becoming from him but still not distant enough to want to loose contact though.

What I'm more confused about though is how long more I can continue like this with him. Maybe I should just talk to him & just having to hear him say the words (f@@kbuddy) will help to discourage me