I can't talk to boys

Daisyxx

I cant hold a proper conversation with the opposite sex!! Im just so shy and i know ill neva have a relationship with anyone unless i show them who i really am but i just clam up when a boy trys to talk to me!!!!! I want to be more confident but how??

Mr Benevolent

Just relax. Guys are delighted to have a girl come up and talk to them.

smk89

well your talking to one now. if you cant do it face to face the internet is the best place

Super-Rush

Most of us(men) are sh1tting ourselves when it comes to making conversation with girls. Its so much easier to do when its just the two of you with no one looking at you etc. Quiet places are essential though. Its hard to have a conversation with someone when you have to scream in their ear. Most important of all is to relax and be yourself.

Otis Driftwood

Can I ask what age you are OP?

I presume its fairly young (could be wrong) because you are referring to us as boys as opposed to blokes/fellas/men etc.

I would put that in the same bracket as a guy calling a woman a chick or something.

Anyway,interacting with the opposite sex is something that can take a bit of getting used to.For some people its not a problem but for others,like yourself,they get tongue tied.If a guy comes up to speak to you on a night out then he is likely interested so you can talk about something banal like the bar/club ye are in,are you having a good night yadda yadda yadda.

Once you get over the initial awkwardness then you will be able to open up more and have a better conversation.

Are you like this just with randomers or do you have the same problem when talking to male friends too?

af_thefragile

Well, you just have to talk.. ya know. Getting good at communicating takes practice and skill. Which will come over time as you go out there and speak to more and more people. So don't get too worried and hasty about it. It'll come with time.

Just relax. Its no big deal. You just speak to them like you speak to all of your other girl friends. Like just speak to him like you'ld speak to any girl.

Also remember you don't always have to speak to someone you are not feeling comfortable with.

irish_goat

Cliche, but try a few drinks first?

Taltos

Why not try some new activities - you will meet new people.
And here is the clincher - in talking about what you are doing - you will be having a conversation - loads of em - with loads of different types of fellas.

Just remember while men and women are different in a lot of ways - we are similar in many more - eg insecurities; fears. So talk to them as you would talk to your female friends. Yes you will meet some prats but there are some b**c**s out there too

So maybe join a club or try something new eg.
Wall climbing ; cycling ; surfing ; kayaking - an activity where there is some sort of organistation (was never into the team sports myselft) - somewhere you can get out and about and just enjoy yourself - when you are relaxed and happy the rest just happens

I like the sea sports as they are just more relaxed and less competitive, so easier to chat

maybeso

Did it occur to you that perhaps you just haven't met any guys who you have anything in common with?

I wouldn't worry about being shy because I'm sure that's part of what makes you you.

If you meet a guy through a common interest perhaps you could use the common interest as the starting point for a conversation.

And as af_thefragile says don't feel like you have to talk to everybody you are put in front of

Pyr0

irish_goat wrote: »

Cliche, but try a few drinks first?

Don't do this, you'll find yourself relying on the drink to get the "real" self out more and more often. Path to the biggest hole right there imo.

LegacyUser

Pyr0 wrote: »

Don't do this, you'll find yourself relying on the drink to get the "real" self out more and more often. Path to the biggest hole right there imo.

Totally agree, i was shy as a teenager and relyed on the drink for confidence,
now im in my mid twentys and never developed the the social skills to let the real me
come out without drink.

tommyboy2222

Ask questions !!

Its how I learned to talk to girls !!

Fluorescence

Try going out with a group of friends (guys and girls). You'll get more used to speaking to them when you don't feel pressured to be the only one working to fill the silence.... After a while it comes naturally then (believe me I was the same for quite some time )

scanlas

Accept your feelings of awkardness and nervousness in the moment, don't resist them. Get enough experieces chatting to boys under your belt and the nervousness will go away over time. Just remember it's no big deal. People embarrass themselves all the time and do and say silly things. You have to push yourself to get the experience.

LegacyUser

im the same only im a guy. lmao, ye its tough and idk what to do either but i think you will find the right person, because i believe its pre-destined to happen, so yah just sit back and wait and im sure yall be ok.

bye