The Cobra Group

FunkZ

I'm pissed off.

I got a job interview with a promotions company, delighted. Then my bro told me to Google Cobra Group, so I did. They're some sorta scam, I'm so pissed off.

Anyways, my interview is at 2.15
So obviously I won't show up, so I'm guessing they're gonna ring me.

What should I say? I wanna piss them off.

I'm thinking when they ring I'll answer and say 'sorry I'm having a bit of a **** could ya ring back in five minutes', hang up and do this for as many times as they ring back!

But I'm sure After Hours can help me do one better!

So ideas? What should I say?! :cool:

AnonoBoy

You should turn up.

Only wear one shoe. Have your fly undone and be quite obviously drunk.

Start singing rebel songs at inappopriate times during the interview.

FunkZ

AnonoBoy wrote: »

You should turn up.

Only wear one shoe. Have your fly undone and be quite obviously drunk.

Start singing rebel songs at inappopriate times during the interview.

I would but I've left it too late! Jesus that's a good idea.

I might try and reschedule it

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

Jet Black

Go to the interview and pretent to be a pirate, yyyyyaaaaarrrrrrr.

Ponster

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Start singing rebel songs at inappopriate times during the interview.

When exactly would be an appropriate time to sing a rebel song during an interview?

Aodan83

A scam you say. Turn up dressed as a garda.

kittensoft1984

They wont ring you. I had an interview for them before and I never turned up...never heard from them at all!!

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

FunkZ

Scien wrote: »

Take a shit load of speed and go to the interview.

It's all outta speed but I do have about three grams of caffeine tablets!

Mask wrote: »

Go to the interview and pretent to be a pirate, yyyyyaaaaarrrrrrr.

That could be good, or I get my nephews Indiana Jones hat and whip? And keep singing the theme song when she stops talking.

Ponster wrote: »

When exactly would be an appropriate time to sing a rebel song during an interview?

All of it! Just go in, sing four or five rebal songs and walk out.

Jet Black

Go and every time they ask a question say. I dunno? Then ask them the same question.

Whats your name?
I dunno whats your name?

FunkZ

Aodan83 wrote: »

A scam you say. Turn up dressed as a garda.

I would if I could. I do have a security outfit but it wouldn't be to the same avail!

kittensoft1984 wrote: »

They wont ring you. I had an interview for them before and I never turned up...never heard from them at all!!

I'm gonna ring them!!!

Scien wrote: »

When interviewing for an IRA army council secretarial position.

:P

FunkZ

Mask wrote: »

Go and every time they ask a question say. I dunno? Then ask them the same question.

Whats your name?
I dunno whats your name?

YEASHH!

I'm gonna ring them if they don't ring me, tell them I'm having a **** and reschedule for tomorrow.

delllat

keep saying what
make them repeat every question at least 4 times

its infuryiating ,especially if you do it well because they wont know youre taking the piss and wont want to offendyou in case your slightly disabled

omahaid

You've an interview with these guys?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cobra_Organization

I say turn up ffs!!

connundrum

Go to the interview with an actual Python in a box.

Bask in the glory of the attempt at being ironic.

the_dark_side

If you are sure its a scam, ring up and rearrange for another interview if you cant make todays one. Then, on the day of the interview fit yourself with hidden camera and mic which you can get here Then do an undercover report with one of the papers. It will be the start of an investigative journalist career for you. You could possibly sell your story too

Blazer

Damnit .stupid group..


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cobra_Group_(Marketing)

I wouldn't mind of those cults that promote casual sex etc

Turd Ferguson

Hate to break it to you but its not a scam. I used to work for them and I made quite alot of money doing so (about 500-600 euro a week).

FunkZ

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Hate to break it to you but its not a scam. I used to work for them and I made quite alot of money doing so (about 500-600 euro a week).

Would you mind typing a detailed post? It'd be very helpful.

FunkZ

Mathew Reilly wrote: »

Damnit .stupid group..


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cobra_Group_(Marketing)

I wouldn't mind of those cults that promote casual sex etc

There's no U in clit!

the_dark_side wrote: »

If you are sure its a scam, ring up and rearrange for another interview if you cant make todays one. Then, on the day of the interview fit yourself with hidden camera and mic which you can get here Then do an undercover report with one of the papers. It will be the start of an investigative journalist career for you. You could possibly sell your story too

Damn straight. Mr Veronica Mars Guerrin :P

connundrum wrote: »

Go to the interview with an actual Python in a box.

Bask in the glory of the attempt at being ironic.

Reminds me of the Ed Byrne slating Alanas Moroisette!

Turd Ferguson

Its a direct sales company. I dunno what stuff they're doing now but I was going door to door selling eircom phone watch (yes, its one of those). It's alot of hard work and long hours but as I said you can make sh*tloads of cash doing it. AFAIK they do stuff with sky tv and some insurence company too.
Door to door gets alot of bad press but I can honestly say it was one of the most fun jobs I've ever done.

Blazer

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Its a direct sales company. I dunno what stuff they're doing now but I was going door to door selling eircom phone watch (yes, its one of those). It's alot of hard work and long hours but as I said you can make sh*tloads of cash doing it. AFAIK they do stuff with sky tv and some insurence company too.
Door to door gets alot of bad press but I can honestly say it was one of the most fun jobs I've ever done.

Why?
Were you shagging all the stay at home mums while their hubbies were off working real jobs?

If so sign me up. :pac:

Turd Ferguson

Mathew Reilly wrote: »

Why?
Were you shagging all the stay at home mums while their hubbies were off working real jobs?

If so sign me up. :pac:

Well there were a few "situations" like that
But usually we would go out to an area in a group of about 6 or 8 and then work in pairs going around so there were alot of games and just general f*cking about

Earthhorse

I just Googled Turd Ferguson and it turns out he's a scam. Boy am I mad at all the time I invested in our friendship. :mad:

faceman

This thread is a scam. Turns out when you post you automatically join the Scientologists.

Turd Ferguson

Earthhorse wrote: »

I just Googled Turd Ferguson and it turns out he's a scam. Boy am I mad at all the time I invested in our friendship. :mad:

I am not a scam, that's crazy talk




BTW, Earthhorse's a/c number: 215645612354 and sort code 87-43-12

6th

Get this printed on a T-shirt and go to the interview!

WindSock

Ponster wrote: »

When exactly would be an appropriate time to sing a rebel song during an interview?

If you were interviewing to get into The Wolfe Tones?

Turd Ferguson

6th wrote: »

Get this printed on a T-shirt and go to the interview!

Cool link :-D

My name is URL

Sir, I need to know where I can get some business hammocks.

Puck

Cobra Kai
Cobra Command
Cobra Group

Wow, they're really trying to not sound evil with that name!

Paparazzo

FunkZ wrote: »

I'm gonna ring them if they don't ring me, tell them I'm having a **** and reschedule for tomorrow.

At least you'll be telling them the truth!

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Well there were a few "situations" like that

I think I can speak for everyone here......MORE DETAILS PLEASE!

Biggins

I attended meetings (and still do) that I am a bit weary of.
I record the meetings by use of various devices I have in my possession.
For most people though in cases like this, I would suggest a voice activated dictaphone pocket recorder.
Not a common thing for most to have but an item that could be borrowed from a friend if sought hard enough.

Such recordings have saved by neck in the past, provided further evidence of wrong doing and just used to see that justice be done.

If you feel OP that this meeting your attending is a scam, I'd suggest you report it to the proper authorities.

(As for me, I go, record it, switch my phone into silent mode and pretend to nervously play with it (hell, you know the interview is a scam anyway) and take their pics at an opportune time. I'd also got outside and if possible take pictures of their cars, even if it meant waiting for them to come out. Pics with car registration numbers are very useful to the gardi! - I ALWAYS travel with a Panasonic FZ8 camera which by the way, if a camera has video record function, that means it can record sound too if it has a built in mic! Handy too or what! Just before you go into your meeting for example, turn it on to record. You will get no picture but it will record the audio of the meeting from your pocket!)

6th

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Link fail :rolleyes:

Quick edit your post and fix the link in the quote! no one needs to know! I fixed my link already.

6th

Now to try again ......

Get this printed on a T-shirt and go to the interview!

javaboy

6th wrote: »

Now to try again ......

Get this printed on a T-shirt and go to the interview!

Thought I'd put you out of your misery: http://tinyurl.com/56x4fk

AnonoBoy

Biggins wrote: »

I attended meetings (and still do) that I am a bit weary of.
I record the meetings by use of various devices I have in my possession.
For most people though in cases like this, I would suggest a voice activated dictaphone pocket recorder.
Not a common thing for most to have but an item that could be borrowed from a friend if sought hard enough.

Such recordings have saved by neck in the past, provided further evidence of wrong doing and just used to see that justice be done.

If you feel OP that this meeting your attending is a scam, I'd suggest you report it to the proper authorities.

(As for me, I go, record it, switch my phone into silent mode and pretend to nervously play with it (hell, you know the interview is a scam anyway) and take their pics at an opportune time. I'd also got outside and if possible take pictures of their cars, even if it meant waiting for them to come out. Pics with car registration numbers are very useful to the gardi! - I ALWAYS travel with a Panasonic FZ8 camera which by the way, if a camera has video record function, that means it can record sound too if it has a built in mic! Handy too or what! Just before you go into your meeting for example, turn it no to record. You will get on picture but it will record the audio of the meeting from your pocket!)

Admit it Biggins you are The_Citizen!!!!

Slow Motion

Miss the interview and then ring them up all pissed off and say

You : "Hey I waited at place A and no one showed up!"

Them : "No the meeting was at place B!"

You : "My bad, can we re schedule"

Them :"OK"

Miss the next one ring them up again

You : "Hey I waited at place C and no one showed up!"

Them : "No the meeting was at place B!"

You : "My bad, can we re schedule"

Them :"OK"

Repeat as long as it makes you laugh!

anti chris-t

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Hate to break it to you but its not a scam. I used to work for them and I made quite alot of money doing so (about 500-600 euro a week).

it
did you work on leeson street?

I worked with them for a couple of years. The money wasnt great but it was brilliant craic and i got basic knowledge on how to run a sales team which helped me when i moved on but i would'nt change my time there for the world

irishvamp90

how is it a scam??

anti chris-t

irishvamp90 wrote: »

how is it a scam??

you're on a self employment basis contract so they dont pay you a basic wage so the only money you make is the commission on your sales so if you dont sell you dont get paid which can be a bitch.

They also have a management programme and they say if you do x,y and z( not getting into the details now) you can run an office and make heaps of money.

They are also big into brain washing people and getting them to believe that cobra is the only way you will ever make good money in your life.

http://www.scam.com/showthread.php?p=746852
Its an interesting read made up mostly of former cobra employees. Theres tonnes of other threads about them as well.

speedboatchase

Snaaaaaaaakeeyes!!

Lollipops23

no way,i had an interview with a company associated with the Cobra Group today!!!so annoyed if they turn out to be a scam:(

anti chris-t

Lollipops23 wrote: »

no way,i had an interview with a company associated with the Cobra Group today!!!so annoyed if they turn out to be a scam:(

what were they called and where was the office?

Turd Ferguson

anti chris-t wrote: »

it
did you work on leeson street?

I worked with them for a couple of years. The money wasnt great but it was brilliant craic and i got basic knowledge on how to run a sales team which helped me when i moved on but i would'nt change my time there for the world

Indeed it was. It is an awesome place to work, if even for a short while. Because it is a self employment situation the money is as much as the work you put in. Some weeks you could get very little and other weeks you could rake it in, so you need to be able to put up with the bad to get the good.

Lollipops23

anti chris-t wrote: »

what were they called and where was the office?

XR marketing in Dun Loighaire?

Turd Ferguson

Lollipops23 wrote: »

XR marketing in Dun Loighaire?

Not a scam. Was the guy that interviewd you kinda fat and very very very very hyper?

Lollipops23

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Not a scam. Was the guy that interviewd you kinda fat and very very very very hyper?

a lil bit:o but also came across very friendly and up for the craic.that's why i'd be so disappointed if it was a scam!

Turd Ferguson

Nah its not. The job itself isnt for everyone, as I said it is alot of hard work but if you like talking to people then you'd do fine and it is rewarding

Lollipops23

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Nah its not. The job itself isnt for everyone, as I said it is alot of hard work but if you like talking to people then you'd do fine and it is rewarding

cheers man, seriously. put my overworked and not-at-all-paid mind at ease!:D