Problem with Housemate

LegacyUser

Hello!

My Name is Lisa from Germany but currently I am living in Galway. I arrived here in October, last year. To explain my situation I have to say that, most of the time of my adult life I was used to live alone or with my boyfriend. I have never lived in a shared house before, but here in Ireland I can´t afford anything else...

My first house was really horrible. I lived together with 4 Irish (3 boys, 1 girl) and they were totally messi - it was so dirty that I couldn´t use anything in the kitchen, I couldn´t cook or anything else. And partys were going on the whole night.

I´ve changed my house and I was totally happy with the new people (a irish couple and 2 spanish). Clean, nice, you could talk to them, good people. And the landlord is so nice and kind. But, here is my problem.

A couple of weeks ago a new guy moved in. He is also Irish and he is unemployed. And I don´t really know whats wrong with him. For example one day, he wanted to talk to everyone and nothing can stop him. The next day he can´t even say "Hello" or anything like this. On such a day he tries to have an argument with everyone in the house and he´s shouting around, screeming, swearing - for hours! Really, like crazy.

Then a couple of days ago he bought himself a fluet, now he use to practice all day. And it could happen that he starts to play at 2 o´clock in the morning. And if he doesn´t play his fluet (it is horrible because he is only bad, he doesn´t have any talent) he turns on loud music or he is singing (and he can´t sing) or just whisteling for hours. All day and night. He is totally crazy and so noisy. And the best thing about it is, that sometimes he comes to ME telling me that I am so noisy. “Yeah I could hear you, last night at 2 am you were dancing in your room and you had so loud music on, I couldn´t sleep”…maybe this guy is haluzinading. And he went directly to the landlord to tell him that I did this – but I am sure, that I was sleeping by this time. I am no noisy person and most of the time I go to bed around midnight.

The main problem is that I live in the room above him, so I think I am the only one who can hear it. If I try to speak with him he gets totally angry. Last time he nearly smashed my down.

And last week he came to my room at 11 pm. I was already sleeping. He knocked on my door and he told me, that he had some water in his room. And in his opinion I was responsible for this because I must have had some water in my room, running out into his… or I don´t know… and he shouted at me how stupid I am because I didn´t clean it up. I mean, Hello? My room is no swimming pool...I tryed to explain it to him but he didn´t listen, he just shouted and shouted and as I tried to close to door he put his foot in it and shouted again “If this happen again, clean it up, do you understand??”

Sometimes I am really scared because of him. And there are others things like… that he always wonna prove how “good” he is or that he is better than anyone else.

So and now, I don´t know how to deal with this guy. As I said, my other housemates are really nice. The house is more or less clean, only 5 Minutes from my working place, the landloards are nice. And if I move out again there is no guarandee that I will find a better place… Did anyone of you had experiences like this?

Pete4779

(This post will likely insult some people. Knowing that, don't read it if you don't want to be insulted.)

Your situation is very common, but you are only pointing it out because you have a different background to the people you are living with (the people in the first house and the new guy in the current house). Galway is full of left wing crustie hippes, who have no regard for any order, spend most of the week drunk or dealing with the mood swings from it, and live in total filth. This is my opinion after a year of living there. It's disgusting what you see how people seem to exist, as if they are savages.

I moved away, it was the only solution; it wasn;t just the people, it was also the lack of clean running water and paved roads. It's Mogadishu on the west of Ireland.

Request that the landlord evict the unruly tenant. However, I would just move out of Galway, it's what I did.

sunshinegirl

Pete4779 wrote: »

Your situation is very common, but you are only pointing it out because you have a different background to the people you are living with (the people in the first house and the new guy in the current house). Galway is full of left wing crustie hippes, who have no regard for any order, spend most of the week drunk or dealing with the mood swings from it, and live in total filth. This is my opinion after a year of living there. It's disgusting what you see how people seem to exist, as if they are savages.

this isnt helpful to the OP and being a leftie doesnt make you dirty,rude or a savage.

To the OP

The best thing you can do is chat to the other flatmates and see if they are having any problems.Or even get one or two of them to change rooms with you for a night or two so they understand your crazy flatmate behaviour.

also write down all the times,dates and actions of the flatmate,try and record him playing the music etc. If all fails starts shouting for another flatmate if he walks into your room. Do you have a lock on your bedroom?Maybe lock it at night when your in there.

Taltos

OP - this guy does not sound right in the head at all.
Either on drugs on he should be for some disorder.

I think first and foremost you need to go to the landlord - and if you are not getting any support there get the frak out of that house. Your landlord has a duty of care for you, and is responsible for making sure that you are not hassled in the house.

Banging on your door at 11pm about water in his room - NUTTER...

petethebrick

It sounds like the guy is an asshole. Often the best way to deal with his type is to stand up to him. So for example if he knocks on your door at night complaining about something you didn't do then shout at him and tell him to **** off. Let him know you won't put up with his behaviour. To be honest though assholes don't usually change so if he's so bad maybe you should think about moving when you can.
In my experience it's often easier to share with just one other person, in a two bedroom apartment for example. It can be a small bit more expensive than sharing a house with 3 others but it's worth it for the extra space. Good luck!

petethebrick

Pete4779 wrote: »

(This post will likely insult some people. Knowing that, don't read it if you don't want to be insulted.)

Your situation is very common, but you are only pointing it out because you have a different background to the people you are living with (the people in the first house and the new guy in the current house). Galway is full of left wing crustie hippes, who have no regard for any order, spend most of the week drunk or dealing with the mood swings from it, and live in total filth. This is my opinion after a year of living there. It's disgusting what you see how people seem to exist, as if they are savages.

I moved away, it was the only solution; it wasn;t just the people, it was also the lack of clean running water and paved roads. It's Mogadishu on the west of Ireland.

Request that the landlord evict the unruly tenant. However, I would just move out of Galway, it's what I did.

And don't listen to this guy - he obviously has a lot of issues himself.

LegacyUser

Talk to the rest of your house mates to see if you can all jointly approach the landlord and request he be sorted out.

If the landlord does nothing, then move out. And demand you get your deposit fully back if you are moving out early. You have the right to live in relative comfort and not to fear or be intimidated by other housemates.

Partizan

OP, i would have a chat with the landlord about getting rid of him and if he tries to lay a finger on you, i would get your boyfriend to back you up.

muppetkiller

Hi OP it sounds like your flat mate has some serious mental issues so
call a house meeting when he's not around and simply say you want him out.

Do your other flatmates get on with him ?

Oh and Pete4779 is talking nonsense too..Galway is a fantastic spot.