Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Dead cert's

  • 08-05-2009 1:31am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 534 ✭✭✭


    Hi guys,

    Came across this, not sure if this is the normal "long stand jokes" within the industry but thought I'd post here, here goes:

    Today's Market Activity:

    Helium was up.

    Feathers were down.

    Paper was stationary.

    Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading.

    Knives were up sharply.

    Cows steered into a bull market.

    Pencils lost a few points.

    Hiking equipment was trailing.

    Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline.

    Weights were up in heavy trading.

    Light switches were off.

    Mining equipment hit rock bottom.

    Diapers remain unchanged.

    Shipping lines stayed at an even keel.

    The market for raisins dried up.

    Coca Cola fizzled.

    Caterpillar stock inched up a bit.

    Sun peaked at midday.

    Balloon prices were inflated.

    Andrex Tissue touched a new bottom.

    :D


Comments

Advertisement