moving in with work colleague...

LegacyUser

currently living at home with parents, im 26 and its doing my head in. broke up with my ex of 4 years about 9 months ago. work with this girl who i get on well with. she also broke up with her long term bf around same time. two of us similar and have a good laugh when out on work nights. i can say hand on heart i dont fancy her. kissed her a couple of times when i was drunk, defo a drink thing though. think she's the same, likes me as a mate but thats it. anyway a room has become available in her apartment and she has offered it to me, she also has another mate living there. been to see plenty of other places and they dont come close to location, cleanliness etc...for the price that she is offering me. apartment really is nice.

but is it a bad mood to move in? i know we can have a laugh and i know i wont go there again, but is it a bit much? work and live with a colleague. and what will other work mates think who know we have kissed a couple times before?

ideally id move in with mates, but everyone has their own thing going on at moment, so its choice of living with people i dont know in a dump, staying at home for the moment or moving in here? opinions?

prinz

Wouldn't advise it. You'll get sick of the sight of each other before long, and will end up bringing work problems home and vice versa.

wolfric

You'd be surprised how much "only like her as a mate" will turn to "can't get my freakin mind off her" when jealousy comes into play. The chances are that one or both of you will change your feelings in the future. Now there are always the exceptions as always in life but if you move in with her you will be first complicating things with your relationship and second hindering new relationships for a number of reaons.
One you don't have privacy.
two :even as mates you may feel it to be inconsiderate of her feelings to bring a girl home as it may provoke jealousy.
three: if something does arise you may find yourself without an apartment very fast.
fourth if you DO manage to keep this all under wraps it may require extra effort to do so which will put stress on your life.
Taking all this into account i'm sure i could come up with some reasons to move in with her but as far as the rule of thumb goes... Just don't risk it

Miss Fluff

Unregistered wrote: »

i can say hand on heart i dont fancy her. kissed her a couple of times when i was drunk, defo a drink thing though.

And what if you come in after a night out and seeing her crossing the landing in a thigh skimming nightie? And if you decide she looks damn hot? Harder to say it's "defo a drink thing" in the morning when you actually live with her methinks.

Carsinian Thau

Chances are that this wouldn't work. As the above poster said: "You'd be surprised how much "only like her as a mate" will turn to "can't get my freakin mind off her" when jealousy comes into play."

It's far safer to just grit your teeth and stay at home for a while longer until a better situation comes along.

Seriously, think of the awkwardness of this if the living together thing blew up. You'd still have to work with her.

Overheal

Ohhhh man.

Been here before. And the short answer is if there is any feelings either towards you or towards her its going to get awkward as hell. Especially when she brings over some guy or you bring over some girl for a bit of strange.

I'm not saying its impossible to behave like adults but you'll need to talk it over with her in depth and really suss out if she is still harboring any feelings for you.

The only reason I ever went through with my own arrangement was I was seriously pinched between hell and high water and I bolted when the first place became available. Think hard before moving out of your parent's place right now.

(and whatever happened to single-bed apartments?)