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my bf's friend??????

  • 05-05-2009 8:02am
    #1
    miss_lucky_13
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1 ✭


    i cheated on my bf while i was hammered drunk ages ago but i told him straight and he forgave me.....
    the probem is that one of his friends just wont let it go...it happened over a year ago and when we are all together on a night out he goes out of his way to try and make me non existant!!!!!!:(
    believe me, i know i was the one at fault in the first place but my bf keeps telling me to make the effort with him and i just cant because he makes me feel so small about myself!!!!!
    this friend cheated on his ex girlfriend several times who i knew quite well but i never grilled him about it r anythin!!!!!!so to be honest i think he is being a bit of a hypocrit!!!!!!
    i dont like him but i would be willing to do anything to stop my bf from feeling awkward when me and his friend are with him!!!!!!
    would appreciate any advice!!!!!!thanks :confused:


Comments

  • #2
    Queencake
    Closed Accounts Posts: 176 ✭✭Queencake


    Well first of -

    Of course his friend might be holding a grudge against you. Chances are more of them do but they have the sense to not let it show.

    Yes, considering he's a recurring cheater it is a bit rich of him to be judging you.

    My advice is this -

    You could ask your bf to talk to him about it. Tbh it's kind of unfair to put your bf in this position seeing as he's having to deal with the fall out of your cheating yet again but...

    If you really want to resolve things for the sake of your bf as you say you'll talk to the friend yourself. DON'T DO IT WITH DRINK TAKEN OR AT A SOCIAL EVENT WITH LOTS OF FRIENDS AROUND. This isn't a soap - make sure there's as little drama as possible. Ask him why things have been weird. Give him a chance to explain himself. If he doesn't tell you ask him outright if his behaviour is a result of your history with your bf then be straight with him and say "Is it because of <this>?"

    Explain to him that your bf and you have put it behind ye. Explain that you feel judged and you understand where he is coming from as he's worried about your bf but that he doesn't need to anymore.

    I would mention to him (if you meet much resistance) that you don't hold his history of cheating against him in the same way...

    Or do you? Ask yourself that. Maybe he is simply treating you with the same contempt you had for him for his cheating?


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