Bored with people.

LegacyUser

Right, would love to know if anyone else has ever felt this way. I've recently become bored with people and am finding it hard to be interested in what other people have to say for themselves. This has never been the case with me before, I was always very sociable, a real people person and always loved meeting new people . I've just returned from travelling by myself for over a year and met hundreds of people on my travels, maybe meeting up to 3 or 4 new people everyday and because I was alone, I was constantly having to be sociable and it's almost as if I'm sick to the teeth of meeting new people and could not be bothered anymore with the "small-talk getting to know you" bit or even anything beyond that. I met so many people with so many stories and experiences that it's as if nobody's story surprises me anymore and I get bored quickly. This is an awful situation because I'm still young and single and have a whole lifetime of socialising and meeting people ahead of me plus most of my good friends don't live in the country anymore and the only way of making friends is by meeting new people.

I hope this doesn't sound arrogant because I'm really not like that. It's almost as if I've had too much of a good thing (meeting new and interesting people) and now I can't be bothered anymore. It's very bizarre and distressing. Could this be a symtom of something else? Anyone else felt like this or have any tips to relight my "passion for people" (sorry, that sounds cheesy but you get me).

Thanks for reading this and any advice would be very much appreciated.

Kevster

Hi,

It doesn't sound arrogant what you have said. In fact, I can relate to it all very much so. One thing you must realise is that people change all of the time (yourself included) and that these changes are based on experiences that we have. So, whilst you may not be up to talking too much anymore, is this really as big a problem as you are making it out to be? Do you have to be a great conversationalist? No, you certainly don't - You will have to adapt to the new 'you', however.

Another possibility is that you have 'move on' from the people you used to hang around with, and it's they who are boring you. As such, try to be a bit more open and start hanging out with the friend (or friends) that you wouldn't normally think to hang out with first.

Kevin

flanree

I would say just take a break from people. You don't have to socialize and from the sounds of it not something you're going to forget how to do. Chit chat is very mind numbing, the best conversations are on a specific topic rather than trying to pry into someones private life. If you were to start a new activity you could at least allow that to create a conversation rather than just trying to be nice.

dreamlogic

My advice would be to trust yourself on this - you are feeling mentally exhausted by it all, it's a sign to step back a bit. After all you've just returned from a year away by yourself so probably what's needed now is a change of pace. Maybe take a break from wanting to meet new people for a while or at least don't feel that you should be. Take some alone time, do some reading etc. Or stick with your familiar friends for now and then gradually or when the time is right you'll get back into meeting new people again.
Another alternative if you still want to meet people but want to skip the smalltalk would be to get more involved in social networking...Ok not exactly a novel suggestion I know! But maybe one you hadn't considered as an alternative. Anyway best of luck.

BertrandMeyer

The 20th century is well behind us, but you have to be against social situation, that could open the door to powerful coalitions. For one thing, you don't know how grave and lasting the consequences of the present and the affluence it brings is a greater crisis than in the wake of often violent protests against the environment. Police are preparing to face a summer of rage as victims of the capital is not private but public, not just rising income and consumption for individuals, but widening the opportunities and what Amartya Sen calls the capabilities of all through collective action. I can't help but think of the mutation that is Claire Balding.

shinny

BertrandMeyer wrote: »

The 20th century is well behind us, but you have to be against social situation, that could open the door to powerful coalitions. For one thing, you don't know how grave and lasting the consequences of the present and the affluence it brings is a greater crisis than in the wake of often violent protests against the environment. Police are preparing to face a summer of rage as victims of the capital is not private but public, not just rising income and consumption for individuals, but widening the opportunities and what Amartya Sen calls the capabilities of all through collective action. I can't help but think of the mutation that is Claire Balding.

Lol, I think you posted in the wrong place!

OP, this happens to me too and I haven't been travelling around meeting new people like you have. Sometimes I just like not to be around people. It refreshes me and then I like being around them again. I'm a very social person too, but sometimes I just like my own company. I think you just need some time out with yourself.

cafecolour

Yeah, has happened to me a good bit - I tend to binge on meeting new people, then get burned out and lie low for a while - ie reading, playing video games, etc. It always passes and I get the social bug again.

Don't go full hermit tho - make sure to keep up with regular mates. You don't have to go the pub or anything, but call in and say hi or go to a movie. I know that can be a pain initially when coming back from travelling, since you get sick about talking about your trip pretty quickly, but it stops being a topic of discussion pretty quickly. It's nice to have mates you can call into and play video games or watch the telly and such without really having to talk.

Finally tho, if it's just small talk you are sick of (esp. travelling small talk which can follow similar sort of patterns), maybe take a course, one of a more philosophical/ideological bent, to get some more debate/intellectual style of conversation in.

Joey the lips

In fairness your not bored as your talking to us!!!!!

Your just tired of small talk its normal. We all get that way. Wait till your talking to a georgous person and you will realise that gold comes from there mouth!

For a month inanyway

I would class you as normal so dont have much advice sorry!

MadgeBadge

Perhaps the same insipid answers, and stories, arise from the same insipid questions.

LegacyUser

not unusual at all OP, I get really bored with people all the time.
The harsh truth is that most people lead quite small and dull lives, and if you've been away travelling, then life can get quite claustraphobic when you come back to reality.

Read some interesting books, read up on current affairs. Take a course in something really challenging - that'll get the brain firing up again.

Otaku Girl

Apathetic wrote: »

Right, would love to know if anyone else has ever felt this way. I've recently become bored with people and am finding it hard to be interested in what other people have to say for themselves. This has never been the case with me before, I was always very sociable, a real people person and always loved meeting new people . I've just returned from travelling by myself for over a year and met hundreds of people on my travels, maybe meeting up to 3 or 4 new people everyday and because I was alone, I was constantly having to be sociable and it's almost as if I'm sick to the teeth of meeting new people and could not be bothered anymore with the "small-talk getting to know you" bit or even anything beyond that. I met so many people with so many stories and experiences that it's as if nobody's story surprises me anymore and I get bored quickly. This is an awful situation because I'm still young and single and have a whole lifetime of socialising and meeting people ahead of me plus most of my good friends don't live in the country anymore and the only way of making friends is by meeting new people.

I hope this doesn't sound arrogant because I'm really not like that. It's almost as if I've had too much of a good thing (meeting new and interesting people) and now I can't be bothered anymore. It's very bizarre and distressing. Could this be a symtom of something else? Anyone else felt like this or have any tips to relight my "passion for people" (sorry, that sounds cheesy but you get me).

Thanks for reading this and any advice would be very much appreciated.

I'm going to go with my own inclination on this and say it's most likely a bout of clinical depression.When you're depressed to this degree you get anhedonia,an inability to derive pleasure from things and people.Maybe a bit of existential depression also.I recommend going to your GP for anti depressants.

seraphimvc

heh OP now go check for some poll thread in AH asking if people like this country or not.

what you said is partly why many of the people wouldnt prefer to come back here/hope to leave here as soon as possible.life in here is just so boring - people is the main factor.No offense really.i bet that might because we are still young - i am in college now and most of my friends are students,nothing really you can expect.

i do have some non-boring friends tho :Dwhich i consider myself so damn lucky

Otaku Girl wrote: »

I'm going to go with my own inclination on this and say it's most likely a bout of clinical depression.When you're depressed to this degree you get anhedonia,an inability to derive pleasure from things and people.Maybe a bit of existential depression also.I recommend going to your GP for anti depressants.

speaking from an Otaku :pac:

i can guarantee you OP,if you sincerely ask some foreigners from big cities (foreigner wouldnt want to offense you irish by telling the truth)about what your problem is,they will probably say something similar to what i said.