Trust issues maybe??

miss.c

im seeing my bf 6 months now and all is well apart from one thing....
he insists on wearing condoms, yet he doesnt mind starting the whole sex act without one!! just before the time of climax - for him - he'll stop and go fumbling around for one, the last time it happened was by far ridulous, i could have made a roast sunday dinner with all the trimming, he took that long...

im on the pill and have made my point that i am but his attitude is - condoms are cheaper than children, period.

any advise on what a girls to do,
frustrated!

star-pants

No offence meant - but he's right.
Not only do condoms reduce chance of pregnancy, they help protect against a lot of STIs.

If it bothers you that he takes ages to find one, why don't you make sure you have one handy, have them by the bed, or somewhere easy to find in the room? You can be the one to produce it.

bluecell99

As far as I know if you are in an exclusive relationship then I dont see what his problem is.You cannot get pregnant while on the pill(in the vast ,vast majority of cases).You will have to be more proactive here in explaining your concerns and that this is seriously affecting the spontanaiety and enjoyment of being together.

Continued resistance by him might indicate some other issue which you can only discover by talking.

LegacyUser

i dont know what your complaining about. im on the pill but aqlways use condoms with my partner. ive far too many friends that have had unplanned pregnancys because they didnt use sufficient protection. their bf's didnt care, they just wanted their hole.
would you prefere if he didnt care? the only way to be certain that you will not become pregnant is not to have sex, therefore if you are having sex and you dont want a baby use all the protection available to you.
out of all my friends im the only one who has never had a pregnancy scare.

Procasinator

If he wants to wear a condom, fair enough. Just tell him, in a nice way, that though you enjoy sex with him you don't like having to stop so he can put a condom on. Tell him to start with one, or not use one at all. It is unfair on him taking all the pleasure from not using a condom, the wreck the flow by putting a condom on for the final few thrusts.

I understand what the guys feels: sex feels better without a condom, but he doesn't want children. But he has to realise that the situation doesn't suit you if you feel this could become a deal-breaker.

Crumble Froo

emm... what about any and all pre-cum that happens before the climax? personally, i wouldnt take the risk of leaving the condom off for any part of actual intercourse.

Annie Bananie

star-pants wrote: »

If it bothers you that he takes ages to find one, why don't you make sure you have one handy, have them by the bed, or somewhere easy to find in the room? You can be the one to produce it.

/agree

nesbitt

bluecell99 wrote: »

As far as I know if you are in an exclusive relationship then I dont see what his problem is.You cannot get pregnant while on the pill(in the vast ,vast majority of cases).You will have to be more proactive here in explaining your concerns and that this is seriously affecting the spontanaiety and enjoyment of being together.

Continued resistance by him might indicate some other issue which you can only discover by talking.

Just wanted to point out that you CAN get pregnant whilst taking your pill it is not 100% safe, no contraception is. That is why a lot of folks use 'double protection' ie. pill + condoms....

Otherwise I agree with the sentiment of the responses given.

OP why don't you put the condom on (deftly) and make it a shared routine...