Really upsetting....

LegacyUser

i just began a new job this week and asked for me to be rotaed in for the day shift friday week because of something personal i have to be at later that evening. my boss however suddently got extremly pushy and what what kind of personal issue i need the time off for, i told him it was my dads anniversary mass and he continued to get more antsy and told me that it will be unlikely and he has to speak to his superiours about it.......all this happening while he was speaking about this loudly infront of other staff members. basically he told me no to something that is very close to my heart and at that broadcasted it to my collegues. i find this really upsetting that anger instead of basic human nature set in. i most likely wont get next friday off and to be honest even in this harsh climate would consider walking out of the job, its retail so there are plenty of people available to look after my section for that evening. am i being overdramatic just to leave if i get a no answer??? its just so upsetting, im still in mourning for my dad really and it would break my heart not to be there.

thanks everyone.

Kimia

Hi, I just had to answer this it's unbelievable.

How unfair of your boss to treat you like this. Unfortunately it's not uncommon in the retail sector for managers to be unreasonable and untrained.

She was unprofessional speaking to you about this in front of others. You should take her aside and request the evening off again in private, and also say that you didn't appreciate your personal issues being broadcast in front of your collegues, and in future you would expect a level of professional courtesy and respect.

If she carries on like this, leave. NO job is worth that kind of sh*t. You're worth more.

LegacyUser

This is absolutely outrageous. Having worked in retail in the past myself I have all too often seen this kind of pushy bullying behaviour. How dare your boss be so unprofessional and heartless. I absolutely agree with Kimia. Put the foot down from the start, be calm and civil but tell your boss that you will not be spoken to in such a manner. Don't let small gods like that upset you, he sounds like he badly needs to be put back in his box.

Orla K

Something similar happened to me, I was working in limerick and wanted the 1 or two days off before christmas to go home(kildare - I didn't have a car so would have had to try get a bus on chirstmas eve). He said no, I didn't mention it again but I did call in sick for the 3 days before christmas and yes I called from my bed in kildare and the manager answered. He knew well but I checked my contract before I did it and I was allowed something like 5/6 days sick before I had to have a doctors note. He let it go since he couldn't do anything about it and other people in work were on my side.

Check your contract there might be something in there that can help you.

Kimia

I would have thought that normally you wouldn't get a contract if you were working in retail? Maybe I'm wrong.

I wouldn't lie though and just call in sick. I would FIRMLY ask for the friday evening off and name a couple of co-workers who are available to work the evening, if you work the day.

It sounds like he has ridiculous power issues. I used to work for an absolute c*nt at home and she told me that she started out as a 'nothing' (as in a lowly sales assistant) but worked her way up to being manager. Wow, that's great, fair play, aren't you clever ha! She was evil and then she fired me for talking too much while folding clothes. I look back now and laugh.

LegacyUser

Thanks so much everyone. i cant believe you were fired for talking whilst folding clothes..riduculous. I shouldnt be surprised really sinces yes retail is normally filled with idiots. I will mention this again and will mention firmly but fairly how i dont appreciate my personal issues being broadcast. This is my final retail job ever, i would never go back to this kind of work again, but im going to canada end of june so i need it for the cash. If i do end up having to work next friday evening i hope the d*uchebag can handle his staff crying in front of customers

LegacyUser

I think that there needs to be more respect for employees in general, it is not that hard to respect people and try work with them and treat them as equals, the employees then feel respected and it helps the work environment. Oprah went one step further and brought all he employees and their families on an all expenses paid trip.

people work really hard for companies to make their millions, and the pay is never as good as it should be,

I would seriously consider leaving if this person has such lack of respect for the workers, could you get another job? and definitely go to your dads mass on Friday.

Kimia

Hey OP, I know I've been there some of them are just awful.

Do go in and talk to him, but if he says No just say 'Well I'm sorry that we couldn't resolve this, so I'm afraid I will have to leave your employment, as this is a non-negotiable for me'.

Be firm and don't get emotional. He should (as a normal human being) see how important this is for you, for any person, and if he doesn't well then the job is NOT WORTH IT.

sunnyside

I had a similar experience working in retail a few years ago. I was really sick at work and the manager wouldn't let me go home. This was in a big shop, I wouldn't have bee missed all that much had I not been there. I still regret that I didn't just walk out that day. You should write a letter of complaint about the manager to the company's head office, assuming it's not the local corner shop you're working in. Any reasonable person would allow you an evening off for the anniversary mass. You gave plenty of notice about this and have almost organised someone else to cover your shift for the evening.

Cuddlesworth

Looking at this from his perspective.

You have already been there a week, you knew this was coming up, you only now choose to mention it and you are quite insistent about going.

Warning bells would be going off in my head about future problems with your attendance for various "reasons".

kitty_dillon1@h

firstly your boss has no right to ask you what the personal issue you neeed time off for was,it's personal!!!and secondly if i were you i'd have a chat with him letting him know that if he speaks to you like that again you will be the one going to his superiors about him!!!
i used to be a pushover in my jobs through and before college but since i graduated im working for a large multinational company where it would not be acceptable to intimidate anyone and i wouldnt be long about speaking up if someone tried it.
seriously in this day and age you're entitled to not be bullied in work if you want to change your shift!!!

Monkey61

kitty_dillon1@h wrote: »

firstly your boss has no right to ask you what the personal issue you neeed time off for was,it's personal!!!

In fairness though I think managers are entitled to be given a good reason when someone wants time off work. I don't think just saying "it's personal" is really good enough in a work place.

kitty_dillon1@h

your manager has no right to demand to know why you want time off, they either say you can have it or you can't but they can't demand you tell them what it's for,if she said she had to go to the doctor would he want to know why? a good manager would have handled this situation alot better anyway. it would be different if she was ringing in sick and using 'it's personal' as an excuse but it's hardly a huge deal to swap a shift with someone else

kittenkiller

Cuddlesworth wrote: »

Looking at this from his perspective.

You have already been there a week, you knew this was coming up, you only now choose to mention it and you are quite insistent about going.

Warning bells would be going off in my head about future problems with your attendance for various "reasons".

I see where this poster is coming from.
It gives a really bad impression to ask for time off in your first week.
Especially as it was an event that you were aware of when you were offered the job.

It was handled appallingly by your boss all the same.

I hope it works out for you.

dreamer_ire

I can also see where your boss was coming from, I'm sure it's a regular occurrence for people to look for Friday evenings off because they want to go out etc. And yes, many people lie about why they "need" time off and unfortunately that makes manager's suspicious. Given that your manager doesn't know you yet it may be setting off alarm bells in his/her head. That said how he/she handled things with you does seem to be inappropriate and you shouldn't have to leave because of them. Do go talk to them again and do your best to keep your calm, irrespective of whether they become unreasonable again. It might be too much for you but maybe you might want to consider bringing in a memorial card if you have one... to further reinforce that you are making a genuine request.

If they still say no I would then go to his/her line manager and raise the issue with them. You really shouldn't have to leave because someone was an idiot to you.

Good luck OP

MrPillowTalk

How long is the roster done in advance? If an employee of mine comes to me looking for a shift change after the roster is done then my default answer is no unless there is a very good reason, when you look for time off someone else loses their friday night to cover the slack.

If someone only in the door a week came to me looking for a friday night off then immediately you are sceptical, although your case is genuine you would be amazed at how many family deaths and memorials are pulled out as excuses to not go to work.

That said if it really is no bother to accomodate you they really should have, nice to be nice etc. You should have mentioned this before you started to avoid the issue tbh.