Depression??

LegacyUser

Don't know if it's depression..

lost my job a few months ago, lone parent with children, struggling financially, normally a very positive and happy person, and despite job loss was trying to stay positive etc.. was getting up as normal and keeping busy. that was ok for a while but have had loads of rejections with job applications, this knocked my confidence big time.

lately tho, i feel i'm losing the will to go on.. Everything seems to be a huge struggle, like normal stuff.. getting up.. showered, cooking all the normal day to day stuff now seem like epic tasks. There was a time I wouldn't leave the house without being dressed to perfection, now i don't even want to leave the house, and if i do, it's a struggle. dont' even bother how i look. I feel like the whole world is getting on great with life and I am totally isolated/alone.

I visited my doc a month ago and he gave me prescription for medication but to be honest they only make me feel numb and i'm sleeping all the time.. this isn't normal for me as i used to go to gym 5 day's a week now don't have the energy to walk to post box. Even today - beautiful day outside and all i want to do is hide indoors away from the world? . have spoken to friends about it and they say everyone's the same.. it'll pass.. that's fine while i'm talking to them.. but when i'm alone it's back to square one.. these dark lonely feelings of total isolation.

i just feel so low, was at a funeral the other day and all i could think was he's the lucky one, that's not normal...never felt like this before and it's scaring me.

Any advice on how to lift these awful feelings? thanks for reading

LegacyUser

how long have you been feeling like this? It sounds to me like you need to see your doctor again and explain this to him. Speaking from experience if you can't talk to family or friends give Samaratins a call, they are a huge help and always there i times of need, an hour a woman stayed on the phone with me while I calmed down and even offered to call me later and see if I was o.k. It is a fabulous day but you don't have to go out, maybe you might feel a little better tonight and go for a walk to clear your head if you can manage it. are you eating well?

LegacyUser

Unregistered wrote: »

how long have you been feeling like this? are you eating well?

I have been like this for a few weeks - eating habits have gone from very healthy diet to eating all sorts of crap - straving all the time?? also eating stuff i never used to like chocolate...gaining weight by the day judging by clothes.. which is adding to feeling crap

zxcvbnm1

As you descibe it it does appear like depression.

Saying that many people suffer from depression and because you feel low now doen't mean you will feel low forever.to

WHat kind of tabs did the doc give you?
Ati depressants ya?

Was this just a regular GP?
You ay need to go see a psychiatrist. THey will be ore specalised in knowing what medication to give you.
Yo also may need to see a counsellor to get to the root of why you feel this way.
Is it because of teh lost job for instance?

I suggest you go back to your GP and tell him to recommend you to someone who has expertise with this.

LegacyUser

yes, it was my own GP - he prescribed xanax - make me feel like i'm out of it, don't lift my mood at all - just feel numb after i take them.

it was definately losing the job that started it, but it's like a domino effect - can't get a job - worried - sleeping/eating habits all over the place. energy levels depleted= don't exercise - feel like crap. look in the mirror and feel more crappy about myself = don't go out...too hard to put on a brave face - it's like my whole life is falling apart and i don't have the will to fight? just wish i could drag myself back to where i was this time last year..don't get me wrong it's not self pity - i just don't have the energy or get and go anymore.. wish to god i did - i hate this feeling

MonkeyTennis

deffo sounds like you got the blues pretty bad. Short term solution, go out and get some of that sunshine, eat bananas and try and get some kind of routine going. If youve lost your job ..is there a job club near you? Its something to get up for.

Long term solution is possibly medication, not a big fan myself. Best of luck

star-pants

Unregistered wrote: »

yes, it was my own GP - he prescribed xanax - make me feel like i'm out of it, don't lift my mood at all - just feel numb after i take them.

it was definately losing the job that started it, but it's like a domino effect - can't get a job - worried - sleeping/eating habits all over the place. energy levels depleted= don't exercise - feel like crap. look in the mirror and feel more crappy about myself = don't go out...too hard to put on a brave face - it's like my whole life is falling apart and i don't have the will to fight? just wish i could drag myself back to where i was this time last year..don't get me wrong it's not self pity - i just don't have the energy or get and go anymore.. wish to god i did - i hate this feeling

I actually understand how you feel. I was put on Prozac for joint pain (I already had insomnia/bad stomach/feeling down) and I felt numb for over a month. Emotionally numb. It was the weirdest feeling ever. I would be an emotional person, good bad or whatever, but not feeling anything was so alien to me. You don't feel happy/sad/angry/upset/scared, nothing. It's like *shrug* and 'meh' type feelings. You aren't bothered to do anything, to look nice, to go out, to see people, it's all far too much effort and you feel indifferent to it all.

The good thing was it did settle out, I think when your body adjusts and balances out with your tabs. It took a few months to fully come back to me. Slowly things started coming back, different feelings etc. And I was delighted to finally feel again. I think the first thing was crying, and as odd as it was cuz I was upset. I was happy at being able to cry!

You could go back to your GP and explain how you feel and see what she/he says. They may suggest something, they may say to ride it out for a bit.
I would say depending on what they think, to try and see how you go for a few more weeks, but being conscious of how its making you feel. Force yourself to see friends, you actually HAVE to make yourself do it for now. You won't *want* to. But it's good in the long run. Hopefully things will start getting more under your control after a bit more time. I know when everythings a bit bleh it's hard to focus.

EDIT- I didn't realise Xanax were only anti anxiety/sedative, not that the above doesn't matter, but definitely speak to your GP first, I'm not sure if you should be feeling so numb?

sam34

Unregistered wrote: »

yes, it was my own GP - he prescribed xanax - make me feel like i'm out of it, don't lift my mood at all - just feel numb after i take them.

OP - xanax are merely anti-anxiety and mildly sedative tablets.
they are not anti-depressants.

you should go back and talk again with your GP about your symptoms and whether or not you have depression, and then discuss anti-depressant meds (or other alternatives, if you so wish)

good luck

dave98

I totally understand where you are coming from. It's heartbreaking sending out CV after Cv after CV and getting nothing back. But don't give up - don't allow yourself give up. You already acknolowdge that losing your job was the start of this , so keep looking for a new job - even if it was 4 hours a day in your local spar shop. It will get you back out of the house and you will gain some independance. Even if the shops dont have signs up looking for staff, we will be entering holiday season shifts have to be covered - ask for the manager and offer yourself for work. I personally work in recruiting staff at different times throughout the year, I prefer to see the person face-face...its shows that they are interested and to be honest there isnt a day that goes by when at least 6-7 CVs will come in the post (even though we are not recruiting) and it gets very annoying. Try it you have nothing to lose.

lynsalot

Hi OP

There's different types of depression. You prob don't have clinical depression which is a hormonal imbalance which makes you feel down with no outward reasons for it. But you're had a lot happening lately. You can become depressed from an event in your life and I suspect that its a culmination of everything you're going through.

Your'e used to being self sufficient. Providing for your kids and managing your routine. your livlihood's been taken away. They routine you were used to is gone. You are bound to feel a bit disorientated or lost. I would definitely go back to your doctor. There's lots of different types of anti depressants so if they're not working go back to see the GP. You could also or instead of tabs try the counselling route... which might help

Personally I was diagnosed with depression in October last year. I started meds in Jan (As I wasn't overly excited about taking them) i'm on a drug called Cymbalta and i had clinical depression. I have to be honest i've never felt so good. I feel rational, happy normal etc. But I completely identify with what you're desribing. i went through those feelings for years. Counselling didn't work for me... as I said Its clinical depression so I used to see a counsellor they'd ask what was on my mind and I'd have nothing to report so talking didn't help me.

First step though is see the doc again!! Hope you get it sorted. if you wanna chat just pm me

vard

excercise.... it really is the best medicine.

LegacyUser

Hi OP

I can relate to what you are feeling. Although my circumstances were different, I felt the same way you have been describing. I felt nothing, a very strange outer body experience, like I'd be sitting in a group of people and wonder how could they not see the real me. I felt like a ghost. The thoughts of cooking a meal or getting dressed were as you describe monumental tasks. It was a very bleak time for me.

I found that talking to people who had not experienced what I was feeling a waste of time. they just dont get it. "Every one is going through it" "sure thats life" "you need to just get on with it" It doesnt help.

I found going to my Gp helpfull, describe your feelings and not the situation may help. All too often people try to pin point and solve your problem by comparing yours to others. This is not helpfull. every one deals with change differently. You have had huge changes in your life recently.

For me talking about it to people who really listen helped me. Giving myself some slack and time to adjust and take in all the changes that were made in my life. Gradually I began to feel myself. Little by little everyday, I would do something just for me. I'd go walking, listen to a favourite song or read a book. It took a while but i got back on track.

I belive everyone has the strenght within them to come through depression. You WILL feel normal again. you WILL be able to do all thoses task you now find so daunting. you just need to find the help that is right for you, whether through counselling or medication.

I hope this helps in some way , just to let you know that your not alone in what you feel

my thoughts are with you op.