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  • 16-04-2009 12:12pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I'm not sure what I'm looking for with this post, I suppose I'm just feeling a bit lonely and need some reassurance. Last year I gave up a relatively good but unstable job to go back to college and do the postgrad in primary teaching. I am nearing the end of the course now. I absolutely hated every minute of it and I can't get over what a bad decision I made. A new opportunity came up in my old job while I was doing the course which would have been ideal for me - but of course I missed out on it. I am in the process of studying for my final exams and honestly I have never felt this bad in my whole life. I chose the course for security and money, and because it may help me to get into educational psychology, a career I've been interested in for a long time. But, I realise now that my old job would have done the same thing while at the same time not ruining my life. I made the decision to do the course on the spur of the moment, based on one bad incident and it was the worst worst worst decision I could have made. I'm actually feeling so low I don't want to go on and I know I'm making too much of it, I just can't study this awful **** any more. I hate teaching I hate the life I'm in now and I can't get out of it. I can't see any light at the end of the tunnel. I've made such a bad mistake and now I'm paying for it big time.


Comments

  • #2
    Communicator
    Closed Accounts Posts: 109 ✭✭Communicator


    Hi OP.

    Firstly, you may not be looking for anything from your post, other than to be listened to. I'm guessing you haven't admitted this to alot of people - the fact that you now think that you've made the wrong decision for you? I'm not going to patronise you by saying it'll all be grand in a while and that there is a light at the end of your tunnel etc because I'm sure you already know, that on some level, once you've completed your studies, your life will change for the better.

    Have you thought of going to your GP to tell him/her how low you're feeling? Can you take a break from college? Study from home for a while??

    I don't have any answers I'm afraid - other than to say that you need to talk to someone seriously about this - college counsellor??? There has to be someone who can help you re-assess your situation>?


  • #3
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Thanks for your reply communicator, it's nice just to hear some kind words :-) I know things will get better when the course is over, I suppose things are so full on at the moment, I'm so tired that I don't feel up to dealing with things. I've seen the college counsellor a couple of times and that has helped somewhat but I'm just in a bit of a hole at the moment and can't seem to get out of it. I know I expect a lot of myself and am very hard on myself, it's a hard habit to break! Plus I'm in mourning for the opportunity I lost in my last job (which I enjoyed a lot). I feel I've dropped myself in crap and I've no one to blame but myself. What I really want is a break, some time to rest, but that's just not possible at the moment and won't be for weeks. I'm really running out of energy.


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