please help

LegacyUser

Its very complicated but I will try and keep it short .
I met a guy and we hit it off . He said he was very hurt by his ex and didn't want a new relationship so we kept in casual . Then he asked for us to be come serious I was delighted At Christmas he got a text while he was out of the room I picked it up it was his ex asking him if he would like her to perform a sexual act on him . I ignored it at the time he had committed to me and told me he was crazy about me here is what has happen since
She sent him a Christmas present
we went on a short break he seemed to be constantly texting someone so I checked his phone it was the ex again sex talk and it was obvious that she was not aware we were away together she even asked if he needed a lift home from the air port
They constantly text each other and chat all day on line
They are openly flirting in public forums on line. i confronted him about this he said they were just friends .
When I brought it up he said that she was having a hard time at the minute and needed his support and I was making him fell bad about it I told him that I couldn't handle it . He said he would cut contact with her .
But it is all still going on the texting and the flirting in open forums he has admitted to calling over to her house once when she had some sort of crisis and told him she needed him . I also know from his phone she has called over to his house at least once in the past week he hasn't mentioned this to me .
I really dont know what to do what makes it worse is she lives in the same city as him . I don't. I don't know for certain he has cheated with her but if not i think it is more or less on the way. What should I do please help .

jellie

well hes lying to you. do you think thats acceptable?

you clearly dont trust him, and from what youve said you have no reason to. but how did you find all this out? snooping online & in his phone? thats not really acceptable either.

sit down with him and ask him what the hell is going on.

Gone Drinking

He's doing the dirt on you, fact.. And he obviously doesn't give a siht so vote with your feet and get the fcuk out.

beth-lou

Whatever sexual act she was offering, has been done and probably repeatedly. They are doing the usual slow break up, occasional shag thing and he has you on the go too.

Just get rid of him. He is a liar, he is most likely lying to her too and e doesn't seem to have any intention of stopping.
Why would you want to be with him?

LegacyUser

Dump the ****. He's not to be trusted. He's telling you one thing to keep you happy for an easier life for himself and then doing the complete opposite. He probably has slept with her and Im sure deep down you know it. When sitting him down again and confronting him, do you think he's going to say the same thing to you as last time or is he to come out and say yes dear I have been seeing my ex, we have been txtin all the time and maybe Ive slept with her. More than likely he'll lie again. Who dumped who? Was it him or her?. You have to make the decision for yourself. If you're looking into his phone (when you already know whats there and has been there), with good reason I might add, then you yourself know that the relationship should probably end and are looking for an excuse to end it.

partyguinness

1. Your new b/f is not over his ex and until he is..stay away. Its a no win situation for you.

2. Get out now as you will only find yourself turning into a paranoid psycho.

3. This will not end well for you...


You have been warned...:cool:

Otis Driftwood

Gone Drinking wrote: »

He's doing the dirt on you, fact

No its not.


OP,I would say tread very carefully.It would appear he isnt ready to give up his ex yet and I dont think you have a future with him while she is very much in the picture.

Beruthiel

Unregistered wrote: »

But it is all still going on the texting and the flirting in open forums he has admitted to calling over to her house once when she had some sort of crisis and told him she needed him . I also know from his phone she has called over to his house at least once in the past week he hasn't mentioned this to me .

Sorry OP but you are the rebound girl.
It is as plain as the nose on your face that he is still in contact her until they get back together again.
If this was happening to me then I would cut him loose. The longer you leave it, the more involved you will be with him and the more hurt when it all goes south.
Which it defo will.
It's just a matter of when.

ManOfMystery

If my other half was having some kind of flirting/sexual talk with another person, she'd be out the door - never mind cheating. When you already have a partner it shows a complete lack of respect for them.

He needs to knock it on the head and start treating you properly, but from the pattern that's emerging, it unfortunately looks like he is either playing around already or close to it.