Moving On

LegacyUser

Hi all

Meet someone 6 years ago.Spent the night with them.Best night of my life.Had never felt that way about anyone before. i just remember feeling so happy.

Didn't see this person for few months after that. Turns out they gotten back with their ex. They got married and have had two kids since. I never see this person any more. Its been years but not a day goes by that I don't think about them. It hurts so much that someone who meant SO MUCH to me feels nothing for me. Am so confused as to why I still feel this way and why the attraction has never gone away. I am so exhausted from trying to fight it. I just want to be done with these feelings but I am afraid they will never go away.Id sleep with this person again in a second if i got the chance. I know I deserve to have someone of my own who doesn't belong to someone else but I don't know how to forget.

lolli

its not healthy to be hung up on someone for that long. Did you only spent one night together? have you been with anyone else since?

idontknowmyname

I agree, one night is not enough to warrant an obsession that you had a while ago. If you know this person has got married and had children why do you still care if it was only one night?? leave them be in their happiness and move on with your life....

cantdecide

You will have to take actions that will eventually lead to you moving on from your thoughts about this person. It has to be a goal I suppose. You shouldn't allow yourself to dwell in the past. Your feelings for this person are not something worth keeping for a minute longer. Free yourself.

Maybe you're attached but you haven't mentioned it but you come across as a little love starved and you really need to get some kind of romantic stimlation in your life.

Try online dating or speed dating or something that will prove to you that running the fantasy of being with this person is misdirecting valuable energy. Do more to make yourself attractive to the opposite sex instead. The person for you is out there waiting for you to find them and no one can light that fire under your a**e only you.

Latchy

Your have to do as you thred title says ' move on ' . It was not ment to be with that other person and the sooner you realise this , the better for your overall mental ,emotional, and physical health . Let him / her go

Miss Fluff

It is extremely extremely unhealthy to be obsessive over some guy you had a one night stand with 6 whole years ago. I certainly hope you haven't made him aware of how you are feeling or tried to contact him or anything. You really need to move on with your life.

LegacyUser

OP here

Thanks to all those who posted.Thought I'd was going to get a lot of people telling me I am a fool.I am a fool. Thanks for kind words. Have been in a few relationships since but for whatever reason I never felt the same sexually about them. All lovely guys they just didn't get me as excited in the bedroom as this guy could. How is it that a man you just met can know what you want sexually better than a guy you've been with for months . Am in my late thirties and I am afraid that experience will always have a hold on me.

I have tried to contact him few times but he just ignores me. You'd think that be enough to make me stop. Have some pride and all that. But what if you feel like you've lost that already. He must already think i'm a crazy bitch so what harm is another call gona do.

He cheated on this wife (then girlfriend before i met him). Was bored apparently. Tried it on with me one night before he got married but nothing happened.Keep hoping if he gets bored again I might be the one he thinks of. Feel at this stage being used for sex be better than not having him in my life. he made lots of promises in past that we could be friends and I was so heart broken that I believed him and thought it was better than nothing. It was just his way of easing his guilt i think.

I go through months when I think i'm so over him and if I met him I wouldn't care and then I go through times when I want to talk to him so much it hurts. How can someone who one seemed so unsure about getting married change into the perfect husband and father of two? i don't wish him or his family any ill will. I just miss him and what could have been. Does that make any sense?

Miss Fluff

You would probably benefit hugely from some counselling OP. Have you looked into this?

Kimia

I agree with above. Counselling would help you Op.

You sound like you have an extremely low sense of self-worth, if you are willing to accept scraps from this man. You seem to only want to be in with a chance of being one out of a few women he could 'choose' to have sex with and cheat on his wife with.

This is a hugely unhealthy way of thinking and I would recommend you get some help immediately.

lolli

Op

it is not healthy to be obsessed with a married man who has children, think of his family. Don't contact him. You need to move on. Some councelling would probably help you. don't make a fool of yourself. Everytime you feel like contacting him just think of his children.

Salome

OP, he won't come looking for you when he gets bored again as he is aware of your obsession for him. He won't be interested in getting entangled in something complicated. And a relationship or affair with you will be very messy as you have strong feelings for him. I'm sorry if that's hard for you to hear but I think you need to hear it.

Counselling will help you - please take that step so you don't waste any more time or heartache on this man who evidently doesn't feel the same way about you. He's ignoring you. Ignore him too and look after yourself.