Fear of dying in sleep

Witcher

Right guys, have a question for ya's

My gf has been having trouble sleeping because she's afraid she'll die in her sleep. She's been like this for some time and she has her leaving coming up in June and she needs all the sleep she can get.

I've told her she needs sleep but she maintains she's ok, I've offered to go to the doctor with her but she won't go.

What can I do to help her or what can she do for herself?

Thanks:)

Barname

Blay wrote: »

Right guys, have a question for ya's

My gf has been having trouble sleeping because she's afraid she'll die in her sleep. She's been like this for some time and she has her leaving coming up in June and she needs all the sleep she can get.

I've told her she needs sleep but she maintains she's ok, I've offered to go to the doctor with her but she won't go.

What can I do to help her or what can she do for herself?

Thanks:)

OK, if she does not sleep, she WILL die.

dyl10

That's not really a rational fear, unless someone she knows has fallen victim to this?

Otherwise it seems to border on delusional, maybe she should go to see a 'professional'?

kittensoft1984

Hi OP,

Do you know where the fear comes from? Has someone close to her maybe died in their sleep?

Some people need very little sleep (myself included) but she does need sleep coming up to her exams.

Id suggest you get her to the doctor, but more so id try to get her to go to counselling. For some people, this is a real fear and she may not be able to overcome it without counselling.

Barname

If she is only your girlfriend then if I were you I would consider moving to new pastures.

She should see a professional and stop taxing you with such irrational mularky.

satcie101

Sorry your GF is going through this. This is caused by anxiety. She needs to go to a Doctor or talk to someone about this. It will go away when whatever is causing the anxiety addressed.

challengemaster

TBH that kinda sounds like it may be caused by anxiety or stress (to an untrained eye)... I'd suggest she go to a doctor and get it checked out.

Lobsterlady

How much sleep is she actually getting per night? Approximately? Lack of sleep can further her anxiety, and stress, giving that she is already under pressure with her Leaving. It could also cause her to become depressed. If she is operating on less than normal hours, say 7, i would perhaps mention it to her parents (is that possible, in confidence, they will respect you!) or older siblings?
Does she have some major achievement that she wants to obtain? Dying in your sleep seems such a sweet mercy in light of the other ways to go:-)

Joey the lips

satcie101 wrote: »

Sorry your GF is going through this. This is caused by anxiety. She needs to go to a Doctor or talk to someone about this. It will go away when whatever is causing the anxiety addressed.

Spot on. It happened to me its an anxiety attack. I know we are not allowed give out medical advice so I wont comment on what I done but I ended up seeing a councillor cause doctors suggest this as the first course

It worked grat for me but does reoccur I just understand now what it is.

All the best

dyl10

OP, remember that there is a lot more to mental health than any advice you'll get here. It may be anxiety or it may be worse.

Not sleeping because of a fear of dying, is NOT normal behaviour, if you feel it's serious ensure that she goes to a doctor. Quite a wide range of problems, big and small, begin with a lack of sleep.

cafecolour

She really needs to see her GP and get counseling. There's really no way around it.

Miss Fluff

There's a clinical term for this which is Somniphobia, this is classified as a Sleep Disorder which falls under anxiety-related conditions. She needs to get herself to a GP quick sharp, there's no way she will give herself a proper chance to perform in her Leaving Cert if she's not permitting her body and brain to get rest.

Munster_Gal

Hi OP
I agree with the other posters here. She needs to see a doctor about this. Especially if she has exams. She's going to need to sleep.

Maccattack

best way to go if you ask me

Witcher

kittensoft1984 wrote: »

Hi OP,

Do you know where the fear comes from? Has someone close to her maybe died in their sleep?

I've asked her about this and she hasn't had anyone close to her die, what she did tell me was "you hear of young people dieing all the time, it might happen to me" I've explained to her at length about how young people can die in many ways and dieing in sleep is less likely than say in a car etc etc.

Lobsterlady wrote: »

How much sleep is she actually getting per night? Approximately?

About 3-4 hours she's told me, she avoids sleep, maybe staying up till 3-4 and waking up at 6-7.

She maintains she's ok, but I know well she's not, she tells me she's wrecked then says she's ok, it worrries her too, I know it does, but has told me she doesn't need a doctor, but I think I'm slowly bringing her around to that idea, it went from outright refusal to "would they help me?" so its progress.

Thanks to everyone for the replies:)

LeixlipRed

Is she a rational person? Maybe explain to her that if she does die in her sleep she'll be dead and it won't matter. I know I sound like I'm being a smart arse there but maybe she just needs some cold hard logic to shake herself out of it. Failing that, tell her to go to her GP.

eskimo

Blay wrote: »

Right guys, have a question for ya's

My gf has been having trouble sleeping because she's afraid she'll die in her sleep. She's been like this for some time and she has her leaving coming up in June and she needs all the sleep she can get.

I've told her she needs sleep but she maintains she's ok, I've offered to go to the doctor with her but she won't go.

What can I do to help her or what can she do for herself?

Thanks:)

I started suffering panic attacks a few months ago and discovered I had constant underlying anxiety that I had never noticed or truly been aware of.

For over a month, all day every day, I was absolutely 110% convinced I was about to stop breathing at any moment. I was terrified of going to sleep. When I finally fell asleep, I often bolted out of my sleep thinking I'd stopped breathing.

I explained this to my doctor and she said that having irrational thoughts that you are going to die is a sign my anxiety had gotten so bad that I was at a serious risk of depression.

"But we're not going to let that happen," she said, before starting me on a path to recovery which included a kind of therapy called Cognitive Behavioural Therapy.

Two months later and I feel amazing compared to how I used to. I think I know how your girlfriend feels. It's a terrifying place, it's also extremely lonely no matter how many loved ones are around you re-assuring you, and the reason is simple: No matter how many people are there to comfort you, If you think your body is telling you something is seriously wrong with you, you can't hear what anyone else says. It's basic human survival. In cases of anxiety, it's human survival gone a bit wrong.

Tell her to go get it sorted. She'll be so glad she did.

hick

+1 know someone close to me who went through the exact same thing, doc recomended CBT as above first session alone was a real eye opener they felt as if for the fist time someone knew whet they was happening.

At the moment she propably has the additional fear of thinking that she's young and shouldn't need to see a doc or counselor, that's something that only happens to other people, that's normal. You have to convice her the smart thing is to go and see someone, I'd back off on going with her though, no mater how close you are, there are things that go on in peoples heads that scare them into thinking their nearest and dearest will judge them or love them less if theyt knew.

Get her the information give her the details, then let her take the first step herself, just be there to support her. Best of luck and fair play for taking it this far.

LegacyUser

I just read this and had to reply. I felt the same way as your girlfriend. It was brought on by anxiety and as your girlfriend is sitting her Leaving Cert in June she is understandably quite stressed out. Its a horrible feeling, I had to sleep with a light on for months and if I felt myself dose off I would immediately get out of the bed because I couldn't bear the thought of falling asleep. Nobody knew about this apart from my husband who in fairness to him was brilliant about it. I was only getting 2 /3 hours sleep a night. Eventually the anxiety left me but I did have some counselling to figure out what was the cause. I hope you girlfriend will be okay.