Is there something wrong with me??

LegacyUser

Ok just looking for some advice...

Im 26, single and have been for 4 years now.. I have kissed a fair few guys and dont seem to have a problem getting male attention but no one seems to want more. Ive given a mix of different fellas a go and no one seems to want more than something casual.. Im at the stage now where im fed up with been single. Dont get me wrong I have enjoyed it but would like a relationship for a while. Not looking for marraige or anything like that just someone to hang out with and have fun. Plus my sex life is non existant...

Im at the stage where I now think there is something wrong with me or im doing something wrong?!! None of my mates seem to have these problems..

upmeath

Where are you meeting the guys you hook up with, in clubs, in bars, through sports/other activites, through friends or through work? Different people go to different places for different things.
Do you exchange numbers with them and do you ever maintain contact? Some basic things to set the wheels in motion.

LegacyUser

Mostly in bars/clubs to be honest - I know!. Some through friends. Yeah we would exchange numbers but most of the time I wont make the first move/contact... think I have a rejection issue (whole other thread!) The way I look at it is if the guy fancies you he will contact you...

Joey the lips

Your very vague on yourself I dont imagine you will get many answers. I am not preposing but if the sex aspect is an only have you considered a nsa relationship.

Outside that do you have male friends. I find women with male friends are good at talking to men and likewise men with female friends are good at talking to women

a bonus is you might hook up with one of your male friends friends. if you know what i mean

LegacyUser

Its not just the sex if it was then the answer would be simple... Yeah I have a fair few male mates. Talking to these guys is not a problem and always seem to have a good time but my problem is that its always a 1/2 nite thing... Im over all that and want to move on but in all the 4 yrs of been single whether I wanted it or not the chance of any kind of relationship had never surfaced...So what now!! Will I be n the same position in another 4 yrs!

upmeath

Unregistered wrote: »

we would exchange numbers but most of the time I wont make the first move/contact... think I have a rejection issue (whole other thread!) The way I look at it is if the guy fancies you he will contact you...

Not necessarily so, any amount of lads are shy, they might think they did well to spend a night out with you in the first place and quit while they're ahead, too shy to make an advance. And any lad would be delighted to think that a girl decided to text him (without getting bigheaded from it)
Joey's right though, without completely spilling the beans, a little more info would go a long way towards getting better advice from the boardsies!

LegacyUser

I dont know what more to tell you.. its as simple as I go out score a guy and thats its usually never hear from them again. I dont sleep with these guys.

For example I went on a couple of dates recently with this guy. He approached me and asked would I go on a date with him and after thinking I have nothing to lose I said yes. (not in teh club bar scene) Didnt really know if I fancied him or not but said what the hell. He was txting every day for about a month which I thought was a bit full on anyway. There was the usual flirting on txt etc. Went on 1st date and that went fine. Went on second date and that was fine too. After this second date I heard nothing from him. This really knocked my confidence. Dont know why or what happended but thats just one example..

Board Walker

well he wouldnt have gone on a second if he taught u were a wierdo or unattractive after the first and trust me us men figure this stuff out fairly quick.

it seems to me as if your not easy enough for him! Ive s;ept with a lot of women and the only one i loved was the one that made me wait 3 months before she slept with me and i really respected her for it so dont for a second think about changing your tactics! your just meeting the wrong guys i think.

cantdecide

Your shyness/ fear of rejection/ other possible confidence issues are affecting your ability to communicate with potential partners, IMO. They may be nuts about you but think you're giving them the cold shoulder.

There's also every chance that there are lots of guys who are crazy about you but your voices are telling you otherwise. Chances are, the guys you're most compatible with are equally shy. You should challenge yourself to get over your fear or rejection and try not to be closed off.

Couple this with the fact that some girls you want to take home to meet your mum. Other girls, you want to just take home. You may fall into the former category. I've been amazed on several occasions when I meet someone who would blow my mind- interesting/ funny/ pretty, all the good stuff only to find my mates have no interest in her, usually because she isn't quite easy enough for them. If you fall into this category, then I wouldn't put all my eggs in the pub basket.