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Family in crisis

  • 21-03-2009 2:55pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I live abroad and i have just experienced the worst year of my year. We are loosing our home in june, have had to file for bankruptcy. The banks dont care, we tried talking to them but was just passed from one person to another. Our credit is now ruined for the 10 years here. This is down to my loss of income from my wife's job. Her hours were reduced to less than 10 hours a week. We have alot of hospital bills that still need to be paid as our baby has had alot of health issues over the last year. The price of health insurance is killing us, $550 a month for a family of three for example. It took a while to find a new job. We used up all our saving to get throught this and now we have nothing. I feel like crap all the time because of it. I have failed my wife and child. I moved here thing that the grass was greener but i was so wrong.

    To make it worse i thought moving back to ireland made some sense but it seems less of an option now. I have alot of family at home. Things are just as bad back home as here. I just dont know what to do anymore. My wife could get a job and make 50k but i dont know about me. When we left ireland i had my SSIA savings, not much debt, great credit. Now we have nothing. The only thing is have is the cloths on my back.


Comments

  • #2
    Loxosceles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 171 ✭✭Loxosceles


    Lost_soul1 wrote: »
    I live abroad and i have just experienced the worst year of my year. We are loosing our home in june, have had to file for bankruptcy. The banks dont care, we tried talking to them but was just passed from one person to another. Our credit is now ruined for the 10 years here. This is down to my loss of income from my wife's job. Her hours were reduced to less than 10 hours a week. We have alot of hospital bills that still need to be paid as our baby has had alot of health issues over the last year. The price of health insurance is killing us, $550 a month for a family of three for example. It took a while to find a new job. We used up all our saving to get throught this and now we have nothing. I feel like crap all the time because of it. I have failed my wife and child. I moved here thing that the grass was greener but i was so wrong.

    To make it worse i thought moving back to ireland made some sense but it seems less of an option now. I have alot of family at home. Things are just as bad back home as here. I just dont know what to do anymore. My wife could get a job and make 50k but i dont know about me. When we left ireland i had my SSIA savings, not much debt, great credit. Now we have nothing. The only thing is have is the cloths on my back.

    You're alive, you have a clean financial slate (albeit requiring you to own only one car and no credit cards for the next 7 years) you're still married, your child needs medical care but it's being done, and she can make 50k a year? I'm not sure if you have anything to complain about. So go let her earn the household and you stay home and raise your child, if your job can't match that. 50k a year is mad money compared to what I've lived on.

    Right now, if your wife can get 50k a year, all you have to do is go for the next job she can get, live in a modest apartment and save the hell out of your money. If 50k won't do it, you're living a lifestyle which needs to be seriously re-examined, and if she can get that 50k a year in a far more affordable city then go for it.

    And if you can't work right now, just use the lean years as time to spend with your child as the primary caregiving parent because your baby won't be a baby for long. If you both sit down and come amicably to that arrangement where your career is on hold because hers is necessary for money, you shouldn't have to worry about your male pride as an income earner. Asking a woman for money can be worked around, like a joint bank account and a joint savings acocunt.


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