Alternatives to Christenings??

Noel-z · 11-03-2009 1:27pm #1

Hello all

,

I am getting ready to become a father for the first time and obviously have a billion and 1 questions plaguing my mind (along with another billion and 1 that I haven't even thought of yet). The one I wish to address here is Christenings. Can anyone give me any advice on Alternative Non-Religious Ceremony options they may have heard of or experienced?
Any feed back is muchos appreciated.

Cheers

Nevyn · 11-03-2009 1:31pm

A welcome to the family or naming ceremony ?

Banrion · 11-03-2009 1:32pm

A ceremony to name the child? Or a ceremony to celebrate the birth?

Ickle Magoo · 11-03-2009 1:36pm

We threw a meet & greet party. Baby was handed around to meet all our friends & family, champagne drunk, photos taken. It was lovely.

lconmara · 11-03-2009 1:58pm

Have a naming day, in your house, and do something like plant a rose bush or something as the focus of the ceremony. Dress the child in something nice and ask people to be non-religious godparents... or guardians if anything happened you.

Or just have a cake, and a little speech saying "We would like you all to welcome (name) into our family, and thank you all for your support etc etc"

That would work.

Noel-z · 11-03-2009 3:11pm

Thanks for the swift feedback. We had thought of something like a naming ceremony with our friends and family alright, but I was Wondering along the lines of something "more Official" that would appease a moderately Religious Grandparent or 2. Anything?

Nevyn · 11-03-2009 3:27pm

Either do something traditional and religous or don't would be my take on it.

Lizzykins · 11-03-2009 3:35pm

It's up to yourselves at the end of the day but from bitter experience the religious grannies won't rest until child has the water poured on them!

Noel-z · 11-03-2009 4:03pm

Tell me about it. I've been looking up the humanists in the UK, but I don't think they have anything like that here. Even something that has a website might be enought to keep them happy. It's not like they're religious nuts, they just want something "Official" I think.

Ickle Magoo · 11-03-2009 7:54pm

Noel-z wrote: »

Tell me about it. I've been looking up the humanists in the UK, but I don't think they have anything like that here. Even something that has a website might be enought to keep them happy. It's not like they're religious nuts, they just want something "Official" I think.

Oh, I thought YOU were looking to do something to mark the occasion, if it's just to appease other people who want a Christening then that's a different kettle of fish.

Nevyn · 12-03-2009 12:43am

Noel-z wrote: »

Tell me about it. I've been looking up the humanists in the UK, but I don't think they have anything like that here. Even something that has a website might be enought to keep them happy. It's not like they're religious nuts, they just want something "Official" I think.

http://www.humanism.ie/cere.html

Noel-z · 12-03-2009 9:00am

Thanks for that

RedPlanet · 12-03-2009 9:04am

Where are you located?
For our wedding, we've hired this guy whom is a former priest, today considers himself a "Celtic Priest" or something like that.
He's got a website http://www.daramolloy.com/
He could probably do something special for you.

Tawny · 12-03-2009 9:18am

In the UK Registrars perform naming ceremonys in the same way as they do marriage ceremonys in Registry Offices. Maybe you could ask at your local Registry Office if they do the same?

Noel-z · 12-03-2009 1:56pm

RedPlanet wrote: »

Where are you located?
For our wedding, we've hired this guy whom is a former priest, today considers himself a "Celtic Priest" or something like that.
He's got a website http://www.daramolloy.com/
He could probably do something special for you.

Interesting. Did you go to him for the ceramony or did he come to you. I assume he'd charge for travel, lodgings etc.?

ally2 · 12-03-2009 2:32pm

Hi there,

We got our son 'baptised' in the unitarian church on stephens green. It's a ceremony for people from all faiths and backgrounds and you bring along your own readings, poems, music, people to speak, etc. It's quite open and lends a sense of occasion.

it was a really good way to celebrate my son's arrival and people enjoyed the unusual aspect of it too!

Have been to a wedding there too and it was lovely.

here's the URL: http://www.unitarianchurchdublin.org/

VeryBerry · 12-03-2009 2:49pm

ally2 wrote: »

Hi there,

We got our son 'baptised' in the unitarian church on stephens green. It's a ceremony for people from all faiths and backgrounds and you bring along your own readings, poems, music, people to speak, etc. It's quite open and lends a sense of occasion.

it was a really good way to celebrate my son's arrival and people enjoyed the unusual aspect of it too!

Have been to a wedding there too and it was lovely.

here's the URL: http://www.unitarianchurchdublin.org/

I was just going to suggest this too, as its something we're considering.

I don't want a Catholic Baptisim for the baby, but my Mother and Mother-in-Law keep saying they are going to take the child and have it baptised on the sly...and I don't think they're totally joking either! :eek:

Lizzykins · 12-03-2009 3:10pm

VeryBerry wrote: »

I was just going to suggest this too, as its something we're considering.

I don't want a Catholic Baptisim for the baby, but my Mother and Mother-in-Law keep saying they are going to take the child and have it baptised on the sly...and I don't think they're totally joking either! :eek:

I've heard of that happening more than once!

Nevyn · 12-03-2009 3:17pm

Any catholic who has been confirmed can baptise a child using holy water.
I know my dad had at my kids with holy water and managed to get his hands on some krisim as well.

ally2 · 12-03-2009 4:12pm

VeryBerry,

I'd highly recommend it as they do a sort of baptism ceremony with water too and you get a certificate - although this of course means nothing when it comes to schools! My son is due to start soon and schools are looking for his baptisamal cert. If he doesn't get a place in an educate together school, I may have to do a quick baptism down the road!

Joey the lips · 13-03-2009 8:12am

I dont know any other except christian but I do know of a women who went down this road and all was fine until the kids were make their communnion and confirmation.

Each to their own I am not hammering away on the faith thing!

VeryBerry · 13-03-2009 9:06am

Joey the lips wrote: »

I dont know any other except christian but I do know of a women who went down this road and all was fine until the kids were make their communnion and confirmation.

Do you mean down the road of an alternative christening generally, or the unitarian church option specifically?

As an side, would you know why this woman decided not to baptise her children, but thought it was ok to have them make their communion and confirmation? From my perspective, the whole point of not baptising the child is because we won't be brining it up Catholic i.e. no mass on Sundays, or confessions, or communions, or confirmations.

Although, as ally2 pointed out, this all may need to be re-evaluated if school places become an issue. Which is something that really annoys me, but if its the childs education at stake, practicalities have to come before my principals.

Pamela111 · 13-03-2009 9:43am

ally2 wrote: »

Hi there,

We got our son 'baptised' in the unitarian church on stephens green. It's a ceremony for people from all faiths and backgrounds and you bring along your own readings, poems, music, people to speak, etc. It's quite open and lends a sense of occasion.

it was a really good way to celebrate my son's arrival and people enjoyed the unusual aspect of it too!

Have been to a wedding there too and it was lovely.

here's the URL: http://www.unitarianchurchdublin.org/

Your child is not baptized, if at all you are genuine.

VeryBerry · 13-03-2009 12:32pm

Pamela111 wrote: »

Your child is not baptized, if at all you are genuine.

I think you may have forgotten to include: "in my opinion, and the opinion of my church, your child is not baptised."

In ally2's opinion and the opinion of the Unitarian Church, her child is baptised.

Joey the lips · 13-03-2009 2:51pm

VeryBerry wrote: »

Do you mean down the road of an alternative christening generally, or the unitarian church option specifically?

As an side, would you know why this woman decided not to baptise her children, but thought it was ok to have them make their communion and confirmation? From my perspective, the whole point of not baptising the child is because we won't be brining it up Catholic i.e. no mass on Sundays, or confessions, or communions, or confirmations.

Although, as ally2 pointed out, this all may need to be re-evaluated if school places become an issue. Which is something that really annoys me, but if its the childs education at stake, practicalities have to come before my principals.

This is my point without trying to seem hostile. I admire anybody taking an interest in faith. I am catholic and practice but I do think some of the new age fads "I am not christening my child" dont wash when it comes to communnion confirmation and indeed school as you noticed. I always thought christian was a good alternative.

What ever you choose practise it and good luck

ally2 · 13-03-2009 3:15pm

Pamela111 wrote: »

Your child is not baptized, if at all you are genuine.

The Unitarian church refer to the ceremony as a baptism. It isn't a formal baptism sacrament as in a christian cermony. It is more of a personal event and a way of welcoming the child into the world. Some people call it a naming ceremony instead.

Either way, it's a good option, but as already pointed out, schools can be an issue down the line. From talking to other parents, I hear that having your child baptised just makes a place more secure.
There are non-denominational schools but not enough of them in my opinion.

VeryBerry · 13-03-2009 3:55pm

Joey the lips wrote: »

I am catholic and practice but I do think some of the new age fads "I am not christening my child" dont wash when it comes to communnion confirmation and indeed school as you noticed. I always thought christian was a good alternative.

I'm sorry Joey, I'm being really dense.

What do you mean "christian was a good alternative"? Surely Catholics are Christians? Or do you mean baptising the child in one of the other Christian faiths (e.g. CofI) as an alternative to Catholicism?

Sorry to the OP if this is completely OT, but as an aside I'm not baptising my child because its a "new age fad". I'm not a practicing Catholic, I don't believe in it, (I didn't get married in a church because of that belief) and I don't want to indoctrinate my child into the religion. Although its looking like I might have to do this, simply to get it into a good school

ArthurDent · 13-03-2009 5:22pm

VeryBerry wrote: »

Do you mean down the road of an alternative christening generally, or the unitarian church option specifically?

As an side, would you know why this woman decided not to baptise her children, but thought it was ok to have them make their communion and confirmation? From my perspective, the whole point of not baptising the child is because we won't be brining it up Catholic i.e. no mass on Sundays, or confessions, or communions, or confirmations.

Although, as ally2 pointed out, this all may need to be re-evaluated if school places become an issue. Which is something that really annoys me, but if its the childs education at stake, practicalities have to come before my principals.

good post
I don't really get the "sure I'll get them baptised/make their communion/confirmation"" thing either - imo you are either happy to bring your child up in that faith or not - if you're not then don't do it. But you are right too that being baptised definitly helps in jumping ahead in the schools queue - which is so unfair. We desperately neeed a separation of church and state funded education.

ArthurDent · 13-03-2009 5:23pm

ally2 wrote: »

The Unitarian church refer to the ceremony as a baptism. It isn't a formal baptism sacrament as in a christian cermony. It is more of a personal event and a way of welcoming the child into the world. Some people call it a naming ceremony instead.

Either way, it's a good option, but as already pointed out, schools can be an issue down the line. From talking to other parents, I hear that having your child baptised just makes a place more secure.
There are non-denominational schools but not enough of them in my opinion.

nope no non-demoniational primary schools - there are multi-denominational ones

January · 13-03-2009 10:32pm

ArthurDent wrote: »

nope no non-demoniational primary schools - there are multi-denominational ones

I know this is probably for another thread but aren't Educate Together non denominational???

ally2 do you mind giving me more info on the unitarian church and their ceremony?? did they give you any help in choosing readings or anything like that? I've left a message on their answer phone...

Ickle Magoo · 13-03-2009 11:00pm

Joey the lips wrote: »

TI am catholic and practice but I do think some of the new age fads "I am not christening my child" dont wash when it comes to communnion confirmation and indeed school as you noticed

It's hardly a new age fad...I'm not Christened & I'm now a parent myself. In fact non-Christians have not been Christening their children for generations.

adrieanne__x wrote: »

I know this is probably for another thread but aren't Educate Together non denominational???

The ET ethos is multi-denominational - inclusive of all religions without celebrating a particular one. Non-denominational generally refers to Churches that are not affiliated to a particular sect of faith - Christianity in particular.

Tim Robbins · 14-03-2009 2:20pm

ally2 wrote: »

Hi there,

We got our son 'baptised' in the unitarian church on stephens green. It's a ceremony for people from all faiths and backgrounds and you bring along your own readings, poems, music, people to speak, etc. It's quite open and lends a sense of occasion.

it was a really good way to celebrate my son's arrival and people enjoyed the unusual aspect of it too!

Have been to a wedding there too and it was lovely.

here's the URL: http://www.unitarianchurchdublin.org/

I got married there. Great place. I'm atheist / humanist my wife would be Church goer. It was great and we were evry happy with them.

Fad · 14-03-2009 3:43pm

Joey the lips wrote: »

This is my point without trying to seem hostile. I admire anybody taking an interest in faith. I am catholic and practice but I do think some of the new age fads "I am not christening my child" dont wash when it comes to communnion confirmation and indeed school as you noticed. I always thought christian was a good alternative.
What ever you choose practise it and good luck

Atheism/Secularism/Not being Christian coupled with a bit of integrity isnt exactly a fad tbh. Standing up for what you believe in washes with me, even if you're a Catholic.......:p But ridiculous generalisations, and believing them, doesnt.

Alternatives to Christenings??

Comments