Walter Mitty disorder?

LegacyUser

Ok had to go unreg'd for this one.
I have a very happy marriage, 3 kids all is good. Yet....there is something missing. Now maybe its a mid-life crisis. I'm 35, last summer I bought myself a little convertible (€3000), nothing flash just always wanted one.
Heres the thing though. I have been trawling the internet for women. not to sleep with or anything, but to talk to. Now of course, a chat is great, but I am going more and more for seperated lonely types who would love a guy like me in their lives. (See I have also constructed a very exciting fantasy life for myself while doing this). So we flirt a bit, they tell me their sad stories and I dispense wisdom (or what I think is wisdom anyway). Lots of them want to meet me, but I always talk my way out of it.

So my question is, what am I at!!!!?!??!! Can't stop myself doing this! Is this the slippery slope to actually meeting some of these women? I'm sure that a good portion of them ould like to meet and sleep with me, if only my international travels did not get in the way!
Help me please!

Oh The Humanity

Do you know the alter ego does not exist or do you believe your own constructs a little bit?

ManOfMystery

First off, 35 is a bit young for a midlife crisis!

Sounds like you are crying out for attention of some kind, hence the flashy convertible and the women 'wanting' you.

You say you're in a happy marriage but are you feeling neglected in some way?

Craft25

i dont think midlife crises' are defined by age.. they usually come along when the kids have got to that age where you have a bit of time to yourself again to take a look at your life and take stock..

one of my mates in a similar position to yourself, takin a look at his set up not knowing what to do, stay or go, play nice or play away..

my advice would be to talk it over with one of your good mates so you can weigh up the situation in a balanced way, pro's and con's of each move, if not a mate then maybe a doctor or counsellor..

it may be that when you get straight what you want in your head, that you can then approach your wife with it in a realistic way.. have you made a deal on monogamy all the way? how would she react to your need to find a bit of adventure somewhere - would she be on board to help you look for it or is that a no go zone altogether

in a sentence: talk it through & work it straight in your head before you go doing anything rash or saying anything stupid to u'r missus - if theres gonna be consequences better to try evaluate them beforehand right?

Harris

First advice - join a classic car club - it will take your mind off things

Second advice - don't meet up with any of these women or you will end up sleeping in your convertible

kaalgat

Harris wrote: »

First advice - join a classic car club - it will take your mind off things

Second advice - don't meet up with any of these women or you will end up sleeping in your convertible

Second advice = sound advice

Aseth

OP, what would you advise a woman sharing with you that she suspects her husband is having an affair. Tell signs are: he has a new, fancy car and she suspects he's meeting this woman on the internet as he spends more and more time at the front of pc? Maybe he's meeting her in real life as well but she cannot tell?

Think about what is missing in your relationship, talk to your wife about it and try finding a solution. There were also plenty of threads where men/women were looking for advice as they felt the spark was gone and they were looking for some excitment, something new. (Similar situation is very well shown in 'True lies' ^^)