BF leaving

LegacyUser

I live with my bf and have done for the last 6 months (we have been together 3 years in total). His contract with his job ended a month ago and he has secured a new one..in London. I am devestated but he doesn't think it is a big deal at all. He says he'll be home every weekend so it won't make a difference to our homelife. I know he has to take it as there are very few jobs around, but I can't believe he that he thinks it's no different to having one here. He is not sad, doesn't seem to care that I'll be living alone and is giving out to me when I bring it up. I am worried that this will end our relationship- that he will get a new life there, meet new people and I will get used to not having him here. Anyone in the same boat? How is it working out??

LegacyUser

London isnt that big a deal if he is home every weekend, needs must and all that.

He is probably putting the best face on it because (rightly it seems) he thinks you will make a very beg deal of it. I once did the only seeing each other at weekends thing when I was working on a project in London, it actually made the relationship better as we enjoyed each others company more when we were together had lots to talk about, better sex etc

Haven't much sympathy I'm afraid, my boyfriend is in Korea! I know it's hard to get used to not seeing someone every day, but every weekend is grand. You can text and call every day and see him every 5 days. If he's home every weekend, I wouldn't even call it 'long distance'. Plenty of people work in Dublin and have a bf/gf in the country who they only see at weekends.

MagicMarker

Errr... maybe i'm crazy. But you don't agree to take a job in another country without discussing it with your long term partner first.

So he's going to be home every weekend, is he going to continue paying his share of the rent? How is he going to afford that and a place in London? How is he going to afford flights? (leaving fri, returning sun would be the more expensive rates).

He should have spoken to you first, I would not be happy with his nonchalant attitude and I would question his motives.

PirateShampoo

Has said its a bit odd he took the job without discussing it with you first.

You should suggest to him that you go over also to find a job and see what his reaction is.

Mr. Incognito

Would you rather he sit at home all day depressed and unemployed to cheer you up every evening.

I think you're not seeing the woods for the trees.

Needs must and you're still living together every weekend.

girl2

I think to be honest I would be feeling like you are. It seems a major change, especially when there was no discussion beforehand.

Long distance can be ok. My sister does it - her boyfriend (who is originally from the same town) is in the UK studying, and they talk every day sometimes 5 times a day, and they dont see each other every weekend. Lucky once a month sometimes. But its working ok, because they really want to be together.

Hope it works out the way you want it to.