guy kept breaking up with me

LegacyUser

Just wondering what people think of a guy that kept breaking up with me? He said it was because he didnt know if he loved me or not! but you should just know if you love someone shouldn't u?

Wibbs

Yes you should. If they don't they're being emotionally daft and selfish usually.

Femelade

This happened me, it took me a while to actually "get it"..he didnt want me, he needed space.Eventually (after about 3 breakups in a yr) I gave it to him, he came back, realised what he had. Very happy together now.

cantdecide

It is possible that he might be emotionally stunted and he very well might love you in his own cack-handed way but I don't think he could hide being having such a problem from you.

If you think you can take what he's saying at face value, then he probably doesn't love you. This is what my money is on...

I do know of a girl who had a very strident, strong willed nature who kept threatening to break up with her boyfriend. It was a control mechanism. Eventually, he took her up on her offer and she pined for him for about 6 months...

seamus

There are a number of reason why someone might to do this - fear, control, confusion, etc. None of them are any reason to put up with it.

If he's just broken up with you, call it a day. Tell yourself that this is it, it's over, he's not coming back. Ask your friends for support when he inevitably tries to get you back. Within a few months hopefully you'll be in a position to tell him where to go if he tries to get you back.
If you're still together, lay it on the line for him, now. Tell him that the next time he breaks up with you is the last time so he needs to think good and hard about what he wants because you're not going to be hanging around waiting for him to make up his mind.

mayblue

yes it can happen than people are confused about the way they feel for someone else, for all sorts of reasons.... it happened to me as well and looking backwards i think the reason was that i was afraid of getting hurt again so i was confused and kept myself under control when my ex bf wanted to get back with me.... now i know that i love him but it took a very long time to get there.....

my suggestion is, let him go his own way and get the time to yourself to think about the way you feel, if he comes back and you still want him, give it an other go but if he's still confused just let him be...

John Mason

he doesnt want to be your boyfriend

but then he gets lonely and he knows you are available so he calls you

he realises he doesnt want to be with you, he dumps you

but then he gets lonely and he knows you are available so he calls you

he realises he doesnt want to be with you, he dumps you

but then he gets lonely and he knows you are available so he calls you

he realises he doesnt want to be with you, he dumps you

but then he gets lonely and he knows you are available so he calls you

and on and on and on

LegacyUser

pink fluffy bunny - you're right! i saw 'he's just not that into you' this weekend - and if he's breaking up with you - he's just not that into you! DAMN

Liam Byrne

"Breaking up" can only happen once, so in order to "keep breaking up with you", you must obviously "keep taking him back" after a bit of time.

The urge to "go back" is nearly always strong for a while after a (each?) breakup; leave it a little (or a lot) longer next time and see how it goes; if two people get back together after a longer break, then it's not panic/loneliness/familiarity, and it has a better chance of surviving and actually working out.

If he knows he can dip in and out, then he'll keep doing it.

But it's you that's letting him.

LegacyUser

IMO if someone breaks up with you at all then they don't want to be with you. they obviously break up with you for a reason and yo are not compatable. IMO if you are meant to be you never break up no matter what. thats what real love is.

beth-lou

Unregistered wrote: »

IMO if someone breaks up with you at all then they don't want to be with you. they obviously break up with you for a reason and yo are not compatable. IMO if you are meant to be you never break up no matter what. thats what real love is.

I don't think that is completely true. I broke up with my OH a few times when we were young and we've benn together nearly 13 years. But in this scenario it sounds as though he doesn't know what he wants and you should call his bluff and go out and enjoy yourself.

Wibbs

Liam Byrne wrote: »

But it's you that's letting him.

+1