Sick of the old dating scene

gaafan1

Hi guys. i am just sick to the teeth of the dating scenen that now exists in 'modern' ireland. i'm a guy, a good guy that would look after any girl very well. i mean take her out to nice places, cinema, dinner, pick her up when she's feeling down, leave work when she's feeling sick etc. but i can't seem to meet the right girl...........does any one else have the same problem? ar am i just a 25 year old who should just grow up and except that thats the way it's going to be???

burberry

gaafan1 wrote: »

Hi guys. i am just sick to the teeth of the dating scenen that now exists in 'modern' ireland. i'm a guy, a good guy that would look after any girl very well. i mean take her out to nice places, cinema, dinner, pick her up when she's feeling down, leave work when she's feeling sick etc. but i can't seem to meet the right girl...........does any one else have the same problem? ar am i just a 25 year old who should just grow up and except that thats the way it's going to be???

Cianos

gaafan1 wrote: »

Hi guys. i am just sick to the teeth of the dating scenen that now exists in 'modern' ireland. i'm a guy, a good guy that would look after any girl very well. i mean take her out to nice places, cinema, dinner, pick her up when she's feeling down, leave work when she's feeling sick etc. but i can't seem to meet the right girl...........does any one else have the same problem? ar am i just a 25 year old who should just grow up and except that thats the way it's going to be???

You need to give more info about what you think you may be doing wrong. Or rather, what you want to achieve but what things you see restricting you from doing so.

gaafan1

i don't know whats restricting me....i think girls just don't really accept people at face value...you know?.... they think it's all bull sh*t because they got hard done by someone a few years previous or something like that.....

girlbiker

Call me!:D Nah I'm too old, maybe you're too nice? Try scowling and riding a motorcycle.

What kind of girl do you want to meet and what are you doing about it? Clubs, groups?

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Sounds like you're trying to hard and possibly being too nice...

Cianos

gaafan1 wrote: »

i don't know whats restricting me....i think girls just don't really accept people at face value...you know?.... they think it's all bull sh*t because they got hard done by someone a few years previous or something like that.....

Where did you get that assumption from? Just because you are being upfront and honest doesn't mean you are gaining attraction.

Polleta

I think the old saying of it happens when you least expect it applies here.

Also where are you trying to meet girls?

I'm a single female and for me to meet a potential boyfriend I would have to meet him away from the drinking culture unless he is a friend of a friend where I could find out some background pretty swiftly!

Cianos

Polleta wrote: »

I think the old saying of it happens when you least expect it applies here.

Also where are you trying to meet girls?

I'm a single female and for me to meet a potential boyfriend I would have to meet him away from the drinking culture unless he is a friend of a friend where I could find out some background pretty swiftly!

Why?

Gyalist

gaafan1 wrote: »

Hi guys. i am just sick to the teeth of the dating scenen that now exists in 'modern' ireland. i'm a guy, a good guy that would look after any girl very well. i mean take her out to nice places, cinema, dinner, pick her up when she's feeling down, leave work when she's feeling sick etc. but i can't seem to meet the right girl...........does any one else have the same problem? ar am i just a 25 year old who should just grow up and except that thats the way it's going to be???

Yep. Pretty much the textbook definition of a symp. I'm just glad for your sake that you've not been successful in dating because you'd most likely be broke and unhappy. Trust me, with an attitude like that women are actually doing you a favour.

Gyalist

Gyalist wrote: »

Yep. Pretty much the textbook definition of a symp. I'm just glad for your sake that you've not been successful in dating because you'd most likely be broke and unhappy. Trust me, with an attitude like that women are actually doing you a favour.

Or he could just have a need to behave like a man.

Húrin

gaafan1 wrote: »

Hi guys. i am just sick to the teeth of the dating scenen that now exists in 'modern' ireland. i'm a guy, a good guy that would look after any girl very well. i mean take her out to nice places, cinema, dinner, pick her up when she's feeling down, leave work when she's feeling sick etc. but i can't seem to meet the right girl...........does any one else have the same problem? ar am i just a 25 year old who should just grow up and except that thats the way it's going to be???

A lot of people make threads like this. Why not read through some of them for the good advice?

Karen_*

Yep there are loads of threads like this and unfortunately since there is no magic formula to meet the right person they are full of of generalisations, statistics and assumptions. Get out and do things, meet new people and figure out how to make yourself happy. Keep dating and hopefully you'll eventually meet someone great.

Polleta

To Cainos' question...

Haven't checked the board in a week.

Why don't I like to meet men in pubs/clubs? Well its imple for me really. I find it hard to trust people and a guy coming up to you in a bar often starts with a line about how pretty you are/how great you look/ how nice your smile is or something equally complimentary.. but problem is a start like this puts me on the defence straight away and I wonder what you want.

The only guys I've gone out with after meeting them in a bar are friends of friends who I would have had a laugh with way before anything happened between us.

ManOfMystery

Gyalist wrote: »

Yep. Pretty much the textbook definition of a symp. I'm just glad for your sake that you've not been successful in dating because you'd most likely be broke and unhappy. Trust me, with an attitude like that women are actually doing you a favour.

Harsh. He sounds like a decent guy, so why all the negativity?

Amigomenor

This guy is a prize wally, i nominate him for idiot of the year if there is such an award on boards.

*Honey*

Oh goodness me... this takes me back a few years.

My hubby posted a similar thread on another board in 2002.. and got similar replies (nice to see nothing changes, same old cynics the world over). I replied however to say that there's no such thing as too nice, being a nice bloke is NOT a bad thing, being a gentleman is NOT a bad thing, having manners is a great thing... I told him that I would KILL to have a decent, nice bloke that was interested in me.

Well... that was 2002; after those posts, we emailed back and forth, then phoned and met IRL 2 weeks later. To be honest, we knew within 3 days that we'd get married... I can't tell you why, but it was so obvious to the two of us. And this was because he was told "you're too nice", "it's bad to be nice" ... don't believe a word of it, you are young (sorry for sounding a bit like your Granny there!) and it will happen for you - be true to yourself, be a good decent bloke and you will find the person who appreciates you for who you are. Good luck!!!

PS stop being such cynics folks, nice is highly underrated!! My friends think my hubby is the best husband in our group of friends, cos he's a nice bloke!!!!

NickNolte

Gyalist wrote: »

Yep. Pretty much the textbook definition of a symp. I'm just glad for your sake that you've not been successful in dating because you'd most likely be broke and unhappy. Trust me, with an attitude like that women are actually doing you a favour.

One of these misogynistic types that thinks all women are scheming and self-serving, huh?

OP - Stop worrying about it and it'll sort itself out.

Abrean

Ok, firstly there is absolutely nothing wrong with a guy being nice!

Op - Don't listen to most of the cynics here, if you're a genuine nice guy then you are bound to meet a girl eventually who will appreciate that. I agree with Polleta though as a single girl myself that the pub/club is not the best place to meet a nice girl, you're very aware that this man has probably been drinking so my first thought would be, what is he after?
Its been said before but have you tried joining any clubs, or even talking to somebody that maybe you get the same bus or train as everyday?