Meeting people online

ecoli

Right the last two to three years have been a bit of a disaster for me in terms of relationships for one reason or another. It has come to the stage where now when i head out i getting sick of the way that things work out by doing the typical clubbing scene to meet new people because doesnt really work for me even though i have been described by girls as a good catch (girls which i have fallen victim to so cant approach in that way)
Anyway my best mate recommended a particular website for meeting new people which from talking to her seems to be going very well for her.I am just wondering what are peoples opinions of taking this avenue and meeting new people online?

towel401

its worth a try but don't expect much. Even sites like plenty of fish are huge sausage fests and have some amount of fake profiles. think 1 girl for every 5 guys or there abouts, worse on the paid sites and worse again on the most sleazy sites like adult friend finder

every girl on those site whether active or not and no matter how bad their profile is gets a bunch of messages from guys every day. most of them just looking for a place to put their cock for the night. so you really have to put a good bit of effort into making a good profile with decent quality pics and write customised messages for each girl with some reference to their profile - no copy and paste stuff.

even then don't expect too many replies as most of the girls on there have been well hardened by months of pestering from all sorts of oddballs. if you do get a reply put 0 emotional investment into these girls because you are probably one out of a very long list of guys. if you get no reply after 2 or 3 messages to them give up or they will think you are a stalker. these girls don't do rejection and would rather use the 'unfriend' button to make you disappear rather than tell you they're not into you (anymore).

using social networking sites like bebo and facebook as a way to meet new people is a big no-no these days as they are being taken more seriously than when they first started off.

macho_man

I have met a few girls on dating sites. Well some I put an ad on sky dating channel and sent txts and made phonecalls. I have been on plenty of fish and met a lovely lady who cares a great deal about me. We only see eachother a few times a month as she works shifts and I work nighttimes.

We have now got to the stage where we have said we love eachother, but not looking to do the whole move in, settle down thing. We have both been hurt in the past and we are just taking it slow and not rushing it.

I say put a few ads up see what happens, sometimes the girls come to you, which is a bit of an ego boost, but watch out some are only out to charge for thier 'services' Gumtree is anothe rplace, but again be careful.

Best of luck OP, hope you find what you are looking for.

Queen-Mise

my brother married a girl he met online, as did another friend of mine.

It is a great way of meeting someone, again you have to be careful

Have you tried all the usual ones, like hobbies, classes etc etc.

LegacyUser

I am a woman who has done some online dating, mainly because I tend to be a bit shy in crowds (pubs/clubs) but fine with one-on-one situations. I've had some good results. Like the other poster said, the numbers aren't usually in your favor as a man. So you have to make yourself stand out when you reply to the ads.

Dos:
If you have a sense of humour, show it in your initial messsage.

Be specific about what you are looking for. I received literally dozens of messages along the lines of "Hi. I'm pat. looking 4 some fun..get back to me. What does that mean?? If you are looking for a real relationship, say that. If you want a FWB situation, then say that too.

Personalize your messages as the other poster said. This lets the woman know you took the time to read her ad and found something specific about it appealing.

Look at it as a way to have some interesting, possibly fun (possibly funny) experineces and meet new kinds of people, not expecting you are necessarily going to find your "Soul Mate." Sense of humour and open mind are critical if you are going to do online dating.

Don't:
Lie about things that will be obvious once you meet in person: age, height, weight etc. One guy had about 80% less hair than in his photo. Another guy ended up being 8 years older than he said he was. By not being honest about these things they were just both of us about for an awkward situation when we met.

Send nude photos (I've received enough c0ck shots to fill..I don't know what)

Use text speak in your initial messages

Feel bad if she doesn't write you back. It's just a numbers thing. Move on to the next profile. It's like fishing...

macho_man

Good advice there ^ should be on every dating site!

LegacyUser

Hi I met my new boyfriend on a dating website last year, we exchanged emails for a over a month then met up one nite and the rest is history, we have got on so well and have talked of babies and marriage, now before him I did meet a couple of people, and they wasnt the right people for all different reasons. Give the dating websites a try, you maybe lucky and you might not be, just be careful and Good luck