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Dating and contact

  • 04-02-2009 6:06pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    here it goes, another one of those dating queries threads.
    Anyhow, met up with a guy about two weeks ago that I had been chatting online for a few months. We both hit off straight away and ended up spending much more time with each other that weekend. So we both arranged to meet up this weekend.
    But Iam a little worried about the lack of contact from his side. Before we met for the first time we would have been regularly contacting each other. Since meeting up, the contact hasnt been as regular as previously mentioned above.
    Which is making me worry a bit as I do like him, and would like to see more of him. But iam worried that his reduced contact in the last two weeks, is a sign of something else. I have been initiating the contact on a few occasions e.g phone calls etc. so Iam not leaving all the contacting up to him
    By the way, our plans are still to meet up this weekend. Unless I dont hear from him.
    Thanks


Comments

  • #2
    m83
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,021 ✭✭✭m83


    There's a good chance he had built you up a lot in his head during your online sessions. Then reality set in when ye met up and he's not so interested anymore.


  • #3
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Over the past few years I've met numerous guys online. Almost all of them do that. My theory is that when they are in the stage of getting to know you, they keep up the constant contact because they want to win you and make sure you don't lose interest. Once they've met you in person and you hit it off, they feel more relaxed and secure that you won't dissapear, so they let the contact lapse a little. It can also be a little game they do to not seem overly eager or desperate, in other words the old playing it cool thing. In most cases with the online guys I met, they WERE still interested, because we kept dating (in person) for some time after the initial meeting even though they were no longer texting as often. One guy told me he figured that since we were meeting every week in real life, he didn't think it necessary to be communicating online as much;.

    Of course it COULD mean he's no longer interested, but if he's gone ahead and made further plans with you, then that's probably not the case.


  • #4
    MDFM
    Closed Accounts Posts: 418 ✭✭MDFM


    How much contact are you expecting from him, bearing in mind that you are still in the early stages of your relationship????

    Maybe he is busy?

    Have you contacted him?


  • #5
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Unregistered wrote: »
    My theory is that when they are in the stage of getting to know you, they keep up the constant contact because they want to win you and make sure you don't lose interest. Once they've met you in person and you hit it off, they feel more relaxed and secure that you won't dissapear, so they let the contact lapse a little.

    I defo do this with girls im interested in. I will stay in contact until I win them over and once I do then I relax a bit on that contact because after all it can be tough talking to someone everyday when nothing new has happened.


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