Awkward Female Housemate

LegacyUser

Hi all,
I'm a guy sharing a house with some people I work with. We work together and cuase of that we have most of the same friends so we usually end up doing the same stuff at the weekends and stuff...

She's a nice girl and DOES get plenty male attention but I'm not really attracted to her in this way, problem is she just seems to ASSUME everyone is into her. I wouldnt even mind that but I find it hard to be around her because she constantly gives off the vibe that she thinks I want her and she doesn't want me.

Its sounds stupid but its very awkward. We live, work and tend to socialise together so I treat her as I treat anyone else in the group, as a friend but you get too chatty with her or joke about or basicaly show any amount of attention to her she gets all weird. Like, I'm just talking to her like I'm talking to anyone else in the group, I'm not trying to do anything about it.

I already heard her telling a workmate about what I "did" one Friday night all of us went out in town. I rang her once after the club to find out where they had gone as half the group was with me and the other half had gone ahead of us. Next day I heard her telling someone about how I "Wouldn't stop phoning her all night long..." and stuff like that.

If I sit down to watch TV in the livingroom when she's there she gets weird, cos I'm sitting down with her. Would it ever occur to her that I just want to watch TV in my own house in the evening!?!?

If we all go to the pub or a club I have to stay clear cos if I come near her, chat to her, joke with her, or god forbid dance anywhere in her vacinity when the group is all messing about together, she gets very weird.

To be honest I just try to ignore it and treat her as any of my other friends but when I do she acts very weird so I kind of avoid being around her by myself as much as posible, watch TV upstairs or whatever but she asked me last week why *I* was acting weird.

Its sounds like a stupid problem but its so annoying, I hate having to avoid doing or saying stuff I normally would around a friend or someone Im around a lot incase it gives her a reason to take me up wrong and gossip t everyone again that I'm trying to get in her pants or something.

What would you guys do? I'm not just gonna tell her I'm not into her and to drop it, like am I.

Silverfish

Sounds like this could be one of two things.

Either she's just one of those people who think as soon as someone smiles at them that they're 'mad into them' and in that situation the best thing you can do is just ignore it, you won't be living with these people forever.

If she says anything again or makes any claims that you are into her, I'd just say clearly and calmly 'Actually, I'm not interested in you. You are a nice girl, but you are not my type.

The second thing could be she could be interested in YOU. This might be why she acts 'weird' around you when you talk to her for a certain length of time. And perhaps her claims such as you phoning her 'all night' are bragging of sorts.

country_gurl

Sounds like she is into u can c how its annoying it wud certainly wreck my head, making everything into a big drama

Loopy

She is into you!!!. I would talk to her (awkward as it may be) and explain that you like being friends but your just not into her!!

I don't know if she is really into you. Maybe her head is actually that big and she is actually that bored that the drama keeps her entertained.
I'd tell her tbh.

wasper

Unregistered wrote: »

Hi all,
I'm a guy sharing a house with some people I work with. We work together and cuase of that we have most of the same friends so we usually end up doing the same stuff at the weekends and stuff...

She's a nice girl and DOES get plenty male attention but I'm not really attracted to her in this way, problem is she just seems to ASSUME everyone is into her. I wouldnt even mind that but I find it hard to be around her because she constantly gives off the vibe that she thinks I want her and she doesn't want me.

Its sounds stupid but its very awkward. We live, work and tend to socialise together so I treat her as I treat anyone else in the group, as a friend but you get too chatty with her or joke about or basicaly show any amount of attention to her she gets all weird. Like, I'm just talking to her like I'm talking to anyone else in the group, I'm not trying to do anything about it.

I already heard her telling a workmate about what I "did" one Friday night all of us went out in town. I rang her once after the club to find out where they had gone as half the group was with me and the other half had gone ahead of us. Next day I heard her telling someone about how I "Wouldn't stop phoning her all night long..." and stuff like that.

If I sit down to watch TV in the livingroom when she's there she gets weird, cos I'm sitting down with her. Would it ever occur to her that I just want to watch TV in my own house in the evening!?!?

If we all go to the pub or a club I have to stay clear cos if I come near her, chat to her, joke with her, or god forbid dance anywhere in her vacinity when the group is all messing about together, she gets very weird.

To be honest I just try to ignore it and treat her as any of my other friends but when I do she acts very weird so I kind of avoid being around her by myself as much as posible, watch TV upstairs or whatever but she asked me last week why *I* was acting weird.

Its sounds like a stupid problem but its so annoying, I hate having to avoid doing or saying stuff I normally would around a friend or someone Im around a lot incase it gives her a reason to take me up wrong and gossip t everyone again that I'm trying to get in her pants or something.

What would you guys do? I'm not just gonna tell her I'm not into her and to drop it, like am I.

Sounds to me you enjoy all this. Who is holding you back from moving into another place away from her?
Simple problem solved.

banshee_bones

eh why the hell should he have the hassle of having to move just coz shes (imo) stuck up her own hole.

Tell her to get over herself

Mr. Frost

She's not into you. Stay friends but try spend more time by yourself if it bothers you that much.

Personally I'd tend to just ignore someone like that somewhat.

Twinkle-star15

I'd say she's into you but knows you're not into her. Either that, or she likes drama.

LegacyUser

To be honest I don't think she's into me. Shes like this around a lot of other guys too. She kissed a few guys in the group on nights out and I've heard how she's torn them tho shreds talking aobut them the following day in work. I didn't realy lke it as the guys I heard about are actually friends of mine too and what she was saying was very unfair to be slating them to their friends and work collegues... they did nothing wrong really. She also made claims about one of the bosses at a work do.

She just seems to be the kind of person who assumes everyone is into her but nobody is good enough.

I wouldn't care except for the fact that as I said, I did overhear my name being mentioned in the same context as most of these other guys and I really didn't like it. Iknow how she tears down guys infront of our workmates and I really don't want to be going to work with people assuming I was being some "creep" chasing her on a Saturday night when it coldnt be further from the truth.

Also, No, I'mnot moving. I moved in 4/5 months ago and signed contract for 12 months. It'd be more hassle than its worth. Its equally my house as anyone else there so why should I have to move? It perfect other wise. Other housemates are great, location is exactly what I wanted and rice is right. Sorry but I'm not moving sticks because someone is stuck up their own arse.

It just bothers me when my character s called into question, especially if its behind my back so i cant defd it and the claims arent true.

St Bill

Ok she gets lots of male attention but she's not getting any from you. She likes you because you're not fawning over her.
If you say straight to her face that you're not interested, I'd bet it would result in more drama. Just start talking about a 'girl you really like' in work, she might back off then.
Edit : Oops, just saw that you work with her. Just start talking about 'a girl' then

xniamhx

If she is only treating you like this, and not your other housemates, then she probaly likes you, whilst also believing that you like her too. I can be a bit like that when in the rare chance that I actually like a guy, its only because I can be very childish and awkward... I also blame my all girl schooling.

I would just ignore it. Dont allow her silly behaviour to stop you living how you want to in your own house, she will get over it eventually. If she continues to talk about you behind your back, you should address that issue and tell her to get over herself.

and also.. I cant believe you live with people you work with, and spend all your time with them..that would drive me insane.....

Salome

If she's got previous form for slagging off lads she's got off with before, no one will pay much attention to her slagging you or anyone else off.

Sounds like everyone knows she's a strange one.

Craft25

one phrase...

"get over yourself love"

say it with your mouth

normalzone

I would "Accidently" leave this thread open on the computer .
Or when she does something as little as snort , sniff , cough , fart , burp say "awww thats *@&#*ing discusting and let her know that youd on't find her attractive in anyway. Maybe smear chocolate on her undies and then dry-wretch infront of her by "accidently" finding them. Lol sorry i am just being silly (or am i?) . They are the sneaky ways to do it tho , but it may save you headache by dropping hints rather than having a talk about it.

estar

- why do you care what this girl thinks of you. stop caring.

- stop listening to whoever is feeding you with what she says behind your back. the next time they come to you say - im not interested in whatever that looper has to say. if everyone did that, her lifeline of creating gossip would be cut off.

- when she asks you why you are acting weird. be honest. say - i heard you said some things about me, and i didnt like it. it now makes me uncomfortable around you. and see what she has to say.

usually when somone is a pain or a drama queen, then everyone else realises what they are like. know that. everyone probably already knows and so you dont relaly have to justify yourself, as people will just take whatever she says with a pinch of salt.

LegacyUser

Sounds like she needs a very public take-down. Next time you're out and all your workmates and friends are around and she does/says something weird, exclaim very loudly, Look, stop coming on to me, I'm not into you and you're making it really uncomfortable to live and work with you.

Either she'll be so embarrassed she'll back off completely or she'll turn crazy bunny boiler. It's a toss of a coin

Salome

I agree with estar's last post - I'd ask her what the problem is, that you heard that she'd been saying things behind your back and that you didn't like it.

BUT, I'd say it to her when there's other people present so they know what really happened and not her version!

Lollipops23

sounds like a class A drama queen tbh. i'd say that you need to start cold shouldering her big time-if anyone asks tell them your sick of her telling people that you're into her and she's a stuck up wagon. sooner or later she'll do this to the wrong person and she'll get taken down a peg.

Blazer

Unregistered wrote: »

To be honest I don't think she's into me. Shes like this around a lot of other guys too. She kissed a few guys in the group on nights out and I've heard how she's torn them tho shreds talking aobut them the following day in work. I didn't realy lke it as the guys I heard about are actually friends of mine too and what she was saying was very unfair to be slating them to their friends and work collegues... they did nothing wrong really. She also made claims about one of the bosses at a work do.

She just seems to be the kind of person who assumes everyone is into her but nobody is good enough.

I wouldn't care except for the fact that as I said, I did overhear my name being mentioned in the same context as most of these other guys and I really didn't like it. Iknow how she tears down guys infront of our workmates and I really don't want to be going to work with people assuming I was being some "creep" chasing her on a Saturday night when it coldnt be further from the truth.

Also, No, I'mnot moving. I moved in 4/5 months ago and signed contract for 12 months. It'd be more hassle than its worth. Its equally my house as anyone else there so why should I have to move? It perfect other wise. Other housemates are great, location is exactly what I wanted and rice is right. Sorry but I'm not moving sticks because someone is stuck up their own arse.

It just bothers me when my character s called into question, especially if its behind my back so i cant defd it and the claims arent true.

So she's a liar basically.
You've 2 options...
1..next time she talks about you or your friends , grow a set and stick up for them and yourself.. Either she'll back down or go gaga. End result is one of you move out.
2. Say nothing..growing even more sick of her lying and eventually you move out.
From what I've read she sounds like a complete bitch, stuck up her own ass and you're better off not hanging around or living with her.