Everyday Things You can't do

Collie D · 10-01-2009 1:20pm #1

Inspired by the "Things you do but nobody else does" thread and my delicious fried late breakfast.

Mine is buttering bread. I have to use spreadable stuff from a tub. Can't butter bread or toast without ripping it to shreds. At 28 years of age still have to get someone else to do it for me

Professey Chin · 10-01-2009 1:21pm

Wipe me arse.Showers work better anyway

Berty · 10-01-2009 1:22pm

Bleed for 7 days without dying.

m3llowship · 10-01-2009 1:23pm

You know that sound u make in the side of your mouth when calling a dog?

I am 24 years old, I only learned how to do it last year, after months of practicing.

And I am still rubbish at it

abi2007 · 10-01-2009 1:23pm

Open plastic bags from the supermarket

UpCork · 10-01-2009 1:25pm

Swim or ride a bicycle.

Collie D · 10-01-2009 1:25pm

m3llowship wrote: »

You know that sound u make in the side of your mouth when calling a dog?

I am 24 years old, I only learned how to do it last year, after months of practicing.

And I am still rubbish at it

Oh, I can't do that either.

Brainz · 10-01-2009 1:26pm

cant really whistle properly or click my fingers !!

and as collie said - i cant butter bread without ripping it to bits the OH has to butter me bread !! im ok buttering toast though

Brainz · 10-01-2009 1:27pm

oh and before anyone else gets in

YORE MA !!

she just doesnt do it for me

445279.ie · 10-01-2009 1:27pm

Wolf whistle

Turd Ferguson · 10-01-2009 1:27pm

Work my washing machine.

seanybiker · 10-01-2009 1:27pm

UpCork wrote: »

Swim or ride a bicycle.

How old are ya?

Zwillinge · 10-01-2009 1:27pm

I can't peel potatoes without lashing off about a third of the spud.
I should invest in a peeler, maybe!

I can't apply eyeliner. Ladies mourn for my unlined eyes.

I'm only getting the hang of chopsticks - I figured I would be quicker at picking this up, since a large population of the world can do this.

Edit: Ditto on the washing machine and swimming.

scottledeuce · 10-01-2009 1:28pm

Stir things like tea or coffee clockwise, my hand only seems ot go anti clockwise

For some reason it really annoys the heck out of everyone as well.

I cant put on duvet covers as well....It just ends up in a ball somewhere and then I cant sleep

sneakerfreak · 10-01-2009 1:28pm

eat fruit or veg without vomiting

eat butter without spitting it all out

thats pretty much it

i eat dry bread,no rabbit food and white meat and cereals and dairy

thats it,everything else make me sick tbh

also i still can tie my laces properly,i have a way of doing them but its not how everyone else does them,dont know hot to explain it properly,it takes about twice as long to tie them that way too lol

Slunk · 10-01-2009 1:29pm

Whistle, swim & eat pasta properly

galwayrush · 10-01-2009 1:31pm

Can't sing.

UpCork · 10-01-2009 1:31pm

seanybiker wrote: »

How old are ya?

Mid 20s. Shameful, I know.

Re the swimming, that's just because I"ve a fear of water and can't 'let go' of the fear long enough to learn how to.

Riding a bicycle - learned when I was a child, but never really kept on doing it, so can't now

it's embarassing

[Jackass] · 10-01-2009 1:32pm

Go out and not get completely hammered.

Mr. Frost · 10-01-2009 1:32pm

I can't iron a shirt.

Last time I tried it took a half hour and the thing was as bad as when I started!

Mr. Frost · 10-01-2009 1:33pm

Slunk wrote: »

Whistle, swim & eat pasta properly

Spaghetti? Try a spoon with the fork

Acacia · 10-01-2009 1:33pm

I can't open jars. In fact, I can't even reach jars if they're on a high shelf. (I'm incredibly short. )

I hate jars.

10-01-2009 1:36pm

cant whistle
can make a broken steam pressure cooker sound, that's it

Maddison · 10-01-2009 1:36pm

I cant use a hairdryer or hair straighteners, cant apply fake tan & Im a really bad cook(ie. I literally cant fry an egg)

Mr. Frost · 10-01-2009 1:39pm

Maddison wrote: »

(ie. I literally cant fry an egg)

I'm only recently able to break eggs properly. I can't fry an egg either, they're always burnt on the bottom - poaching's the way to go!

Acacia · 10-01-2009 1:40pm

Mr. Frost wrote: »

I'm only recently able to break eggs properly. I can't fry an egg either, they're always burnt on the bottom - poaching's the way to go!

I recommend scrambling for egg-cooking noobs. It's easy- just leave the eggs in the saucepan, and stir occasionally. They cook themselves. You can't go wrong really. :pac:

Mmmm, eggs...

Maddison · 10-01-2009 1:41pm

I cant poach either, all I end up with is a cloudy pot with a yolk in it!!My partners really lucky to have me isnt he:D
I have got things Im incredibly good at though:p

Mongo · 10-01-2009 1:42pm

Ride a bicycle.
Wolf whistle
Roll my tongue
Cross my eyes
Can never remember which setting is which on the oven/grill

pipeliner · 10-01-2009 1:42pm

hold a pen properly. I remember im primary school an inspector was in and would not let me write in the way i was comfortable, i had to do it like everyone else. My writing looked like as if i used the bad hand. I think he also made lefties use their right hand that day

Honey-ec · 10-01-2009 1:43pm

I can't do a fingers-in-the-mouth whistle or cycle a bike with no hands.

ZzubZzub · 10-01-2009 1:44pm

I can only wink my left eye. If I try to wink my right eye, I just end up blinking spastically.

I cant roll cigs either. I switched to rollies because I cant afford the luxury of tailor made anymore. They all end up looking either like joints (really good ones!) or like twigs, really thin at the top. My friend can roll without looking. Dyke.

galwayrush · 10-01-2009 1:44pm

One positive, i can't get a hangover anymore, despite how much i drink.:)

seanybiker · 10-01-2009 1:44pm

Mongo wrote: »

Can never remember which setting is which on the oven/grill

On = hot
Off = cold

Mr. Frost · 10-01-2009 1:45pm

Acacia wrote: »

I recommend scrambling for egg-cooking noobs. It's easy- just leave the eggs in the saucepan, and stir occasionally. They cook themselves. You can't go wrong really. :pac:

Mmmm, eggs...

Yeah I used to scramble but I've been persevering for months now and I've managed to get the hang of it, though sometimes they go all over the shop in the saucepan.

They are good!

Mr. Frost · 10-01-2009 1:46pm

Maddison wrote: »

I cant poach either, all I end up with is a cloudy pot with a yolk in it!!My partners really lucky to have me isnt he:D
I have got things Im incredibly good at though:p

Well I'd keep a bad cook if I was him then :pac:

JC 2K3 · 10-01-2009 1:46pm

Yore Ma.

Wouldn't want to risk an STI.

Mr. Frost · 10-01-2009 1:47pm

Cleeo wrote: »

I can only wink my left eye. If I try to wink my right eye, I just end up blinking spastically.

I cant roll cigs either. I switched to rollies because I cant afford the luxury of tailor made anymore. They all end up looking either like joints (really good ones!) or like twigs, really thin at the top. My friend can roll without looking. Dyke.

Can't roll, can't wink with right eye.

Acacia · 10-01-2009 1:49pm

Mr. Frost wrote: »

Yeah I used to scramble but I've been persevering for months now and I've managed to get the hang of it, though sometimes they go all over the shop in the saucepan.

They are good!

'Tis all practice. Make sure you put some milk and butter in there for extra-creaminess. Actually making scrambled eggs is one everyday thing I can do really well.:D

*runs off to make eggs*

Capt'n Midnight · 10-01-2009 1:54pm

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Work my washing machine.

Turn the dial to "D"

Mr. Frost · 10-01-2009 1:55pm

Acacia wrote: »

'Tis all practice. Make sure you put some milk and butter in there for extra-creaminess. Actually making scrambled eggs is one everyday thing I can do really well.:D

*runs off to make eggs*

Oh yeah milk for the scrambled eggs - non-fat though! I've had my fill of eggs this morning. Can't wait for tomorrow morning!

Actually, go on, stick me on some!

Fizman · 10-01-2009 2:00pm

I can't give myself a BJ.

It sucks.

ZzubZzub · 10-01-2009 2:02pm

Mr. Frost wrote: »

Can't roll, can't wink with right eye.

TWINS!

Mr. Frost · 10-01-2009 2:06pm

Cleeo wrote: »

TWINS!

Serperated at birth. I'm awesome. Are you awesome too?! :pac:

banshee_bones · 10-01-2009 2:06pm

Cant swim

Oh and im getting used to using eyeliner aswell, still at the trial and error stage where half the time i look like i have been given a black eye!!! so have to take it all off and start again.... :rolleyes:

Mr. Frost · 10-01-2009 2:08pm

banshee_bones wrote: »

Cant swim

Oh and im getting used to using eyeliner aswell, still at the trial and error stage where half the time i look like i have been given a black eye!!! so have to take it all off and start again.... :rolleyes:

People that can't swim, would you consider or have you considered getting lessons? It's a great thing to be able to do. Just saying.

ZzubZzub · 10-01-2009 2:14pm

Mr. Frost wrote: »

Serperated at birth. I'm awesome. Are you awesome too?! :pac:

Awsome? No. Im ga-ga-ga-GANSTA BABY! Indeed.

I also can't make mash potato.I dont like it, so it doesnt bother me.... But yeah.

omb0wyn5ehpij9 · 10-01-2009 2:16pm

I can't swim

Mr. Frost · 10-01-2009 2:17pm

Cleeo wrote: »

Awsome? No. Im ga-ga-ga-GANSTA BABY! Indeed.

I also can't make mash potato.I dont like it, so it doesnt bother me.... But yeah.

:pac:

I've never made mash potato! Only eat roasties if I eat them at all! Actually sweet potatoes are goooooood!

Mr. Frost · 10-01-2009 2:18pm

Bryn wrote: »

I can't swim

Anyone that can't swim and wants to learn should. It's great to be able to swim. You're sort of limited too when you go on hols or that ya know...

Naikon · 10-01-2009 2:19pm

I manage to break the yoke when putting eggs into a frying pan.

Mr. Frost · 10-01-2009 2:21pm

Naikon wrote: »

I manage to break the yoke when putting eggs into a frying pan without fail.

It's bloody hard to get the hang of I think!

I remember on hols in the restaurant, it was a buffet breakfast and the chef was cracking eggs one-handed into the frying pan, I aspire to be able to do that!

Everyday Things You can't do

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