Girlfriend carries condoms...

partyguinness

I have been with my girlfriend for over a year and she is on the pill. I see her every weekend. During Xmas I was with her and getting keys out of her handbag (at her request) and I saw that she had two condoms in her bag (unopened for you smartasses).

They are actually mine from a pack I bought about 18 months ago and before I met her. I teased her about why she would carry them as we do not use them.

She lauged it off and in truth gave me no plausible explanation. I didnt dwell on it as I didnt want any arguments during xmas. She admitted that she would be concerned if I was carrying them around.

What shoud I think of this?

Tazz T

TBH, 90% of all items found in women's handbags don't belong there.

helimachoptor

You gave them to her...

I'd be more worried if they weren't there:eek:

Eviledna

Most likely she has them in there to double up if she is late or forgets to take the pill and things get hot and heavy between ye.
Also, she might have them in there as a declaration of her sexual liberation and responsibility towards contraception.

However, all hypothesises aside, if you think she is cheating on you with your own condoms, ask her outright!

jigglywoo

Better to have and not need than to need and not have.

What if you two went away on some romantic weekend and she accidently forgot to bring/take her pill, then you'd need them.

Dragan

Hardly anything to worry about dude. Girls will carry all kinds of things in their hand bags, and not always think too deeply about why something is in there.

Add in the fact that a lot of girls tend to put stuff into their bag to cover "eventualities" outside of themselves, that is to say, the possible needs of other people.

I have known plenty of girls to carry condoms at all times, simply because you never know whats gonna happen. I have also known girls to carry condoms simply because a friend might need them some night.

That said, if you really want to make an issue of it you need to ask yourself why.

g'em

partyguinness wrote: »

What shoud I think of this?

That she's a responsible individual? That she's carrying them around in case a friend, male or female, needs one? Or perhaps incase she needs them with you (pills get forgotten/ tummy bugs happen)?

There's a lot of very plausible reasons for your gf to carry condoms tbh.

Red Hand

In a former life as mime artist/street performer extradonaire, I used to make balloon animals for people using nothing more than a simple latex sheath and some air.

Perhaps your g/f is about to become engaged in a similiar occupation?

AnonoBoy

partyguinness wrote: »

They are actually mine from a pack I bought about 18 months ago and before I met her.

How did you recognise them as yours? Do you get your condoms monogrammed?

She could be carrying them in case any of her friends get caught short?

partyguinness

helimachoptor wrote: »

You gave them to her...

I'd be more worried if they weren't there:eek:

In fairness I didnt give them to her...but its interesting to note that she would have issues with me carrying them around...

partyguinness

AnonoBoy wrote: »

How did you recognise them as yours? Do you get your condoms monogrammed?

She could be carrying them in case any of her friends get caught short?

Well the thing is we are both in our early 30s and, without exaggeration, all her friends are married and some with kids. She doesnt 'go out' as such to nightclubs, pubs etc and mad night boozy nights out with the girls. And those without kids are trying to get pregnant...

So really there is no situation where that would arise...

Nevyn

Last time I gave a condom to someone who needed one was not a friend but a rather drunk girl who was arguing with a broken vending machine in the ladies toilets.
I have nearly always had condoms in my bag even when I was in a long term relationship and not using them.

If you have issue with them being in your gf bag you need to have a think about it and figure out what your issues are and then talk to you gf rationally rather then blurting out something stupid like accusing her of wanting the cheat on you.

CeilingCat

Backup in case of forgotten pills and/or stomach bugs.... also maybe she was on antibiotics, which can lessen the effects of the pill. I've done that often, just in case.

I've also often carried around stuff I didn't need, just because.

homerun_homer

Well if you bought them 18 months ago and she hasn't used them then you have nothing to be paranoid about. They are just backup.

partyguinness

homerun_homer wrote: »

Well if you bought them 18 months ago and she hasn't used them then you have nothing to be paranoid about. They are just backup.

They are two from a box of 18 and I have loads left.

I am thinking of marking them with some sort of invisible ink and checking every few weeks to see it the same ones are still there..lol..or expertly putting chilly pepper under the foil...:P:P

homerun_homer

Ouch!!

cuckoo

Thaedydal wrote: »

Last time I gave a condom to someone who needed one was not a friend but a rather drunk girl who was arguing with a broken vending machine in the ladies toilets.
I have nearly always had condoms in my bag even when I was in a long term relationship and not using them.
.

I've done that too - i was involved in sexual health campaigns while in college, so people would have known my face as 'oh, that girl with all the condoms', so i occasionally was asked for one on random nights out.

OP, handbags are like the TARDIS, all sorts of things end up in there. I have a screwdriver in mine (has proven handy) and all sorts of other junk. I also have some stuff that has been in my bag for so long that i almost consider it a good luck charm, or protective amulet.

But....if those condoms have been rattling around in her bag for 18 months they should probably be binned. Keys, sharp corners on things, friction - they can all damage the foil and the condom inside. Extremes of temperature can also weaken the condoms. If she wants to continue carrying them, maybe suggest she get a small tin/change purse to keep them in.

partyguinness

cuckoo wrote: »

I've done that too - i was involved in sexual health campaigns while in college, so people would have known my face as 'oh, that girl with all the condoms', so i occasionally was asked for one on random nights out.

OP, handbags are like the TARDIS, all sorts of things end up in there. I have a screwdriver in mine (has proven handy) and all sorts of other junk. I also have some stuff that has been in my bag for so long that i almost consider it a good luck charm, or protective amulet.

But....if those condoms have been rattling around in her bag for 18 months they should probably be binned. Keys, sharp corners on things, friction - they can all damage the foil and the condom inside. Extremes of temperature can also weaken the condoms. If she wants to continue carrying them, maybe suggest she get a small tin/change purse to keep them in.

Yes tscrewdrivers are handy, as are bottle openers, matches and tissues as they can be used for all sorts...but condoms are only used for one thing in my eyes and they have only appeared over the last few weeks.

But she is the only one that answer and she didnt offer any expanation and stated that she would be funny about ME carrying condoms..thats a little strange.

partyguinness

partyguinness wrote:

But she is the only one that answer and she didnt offer any expanation and stated that she would be funny about ME carrying condoms..thats a little strange.

And presumably you asked her why, before making a thread about it?

partyguinness

Yes I did ask her and I dont see how that invalidates my entitlement to start a thread on the matter to gauge other opinion. If that is what you are implying...:cool:

partyguinness

partyguinness wrote: »

Yes I did ask her and I dont see how that invalidates my entitlement to start a thread on the matter to gauge other opinion. If that is what you are implying...:cool:

No, it just seems odd to me you didn't mention that as the first thing out of my mouth in that situation would be "well, why?" rather than talking to strangers about it who wouldn't have a clue

So what was her reason or did she not answer that either

Rej

I wouldnt worry about it too much.. I have all sorts of things in my bag... Like an earlier poster said, women have loads of 'just incase' stuff in their bags.. I regularly have stuff like plasters, painkillers, mini sewing kits, spare tights etc. in my bag.

If you want to know if they are from your box, then check the batch number and expiry date. If they have passed their date then you can suggest she throws them out, or lighten the mood get her a mini-box of the durex sensations.

Silverfish

Thaedydal wrote: »

Last time I gave a condom to someone who needed one was not a friend but a rather drunk girl who was arguing with a broken vending machine in the ladies toilets.
I have nearly always had condoms in my bag even when I was in a long term relationship and not using them.

Actually, I remember you handing me one about 5 or 6 years ago.

I still have it. Its out of date. Can I get an exchange?

what would she think if you were carrying around a few of her things in your wallet? Eg: An always Ultra pad with wings

Pherekydes

Ockham's razor.

The simplest answer is usually the right one: she simply hasn't cleaned out her bag properly in 18 months.

Am I right, ladies?

Zaph

Condoms - not just for wallets, now in handy handbag sizes too!


Seriously OP, what is it exactly you're looking for here?

Is your girlfriend cheating on you because she has condoms in her bag?

How should we know, she's your girlfriend, and if you have trust issues I suggest you spend some time discussing them with her.

Do women generally carry condoms about with them?

Based on the evidence of this thread I'd say yes, and for any one of a number of reasons. The presence of them in a woman's handbag is not conclusive evidence of an affair. Or anything else for that matter.

Are women's handbags the terrestrial equivalent of black holes?

Undoubtedly, you never know what you might find in one. Maybe even some 18 month old condoms if you're really lucky. Although as has been suggested, she should probably ditch them at this stage if they've been floating about loose in there all this time.

Have you guys been practising safe sex?

Apparently not if you're together a year and have an unused pack of 18 month old condoms knocking about. An old STI check mightn't be such a bad idea if you haven't had one already.

fits

I got a new handbag last week, and emptied out the old one. Its fecking amazing what can accumulate in there. Twas like Mary Poppins' bag tbh...


I wouldnt read too much into this at all.

Nevyn

Silverfish wrote: »

Actually, I remember you handing me one about 5 or 6 years ago.

That was a fun evening.

Silverfish wrote: »

I still have it. Its out of date. Can I get an exchange?

You didn't use it ?
Like it's nice that you kept it as a token of my affection but really...
IF you want a chance at getting another one of me that means you are going
to have to come out to a beers

LightningBolt

Never look inside a girls bag, seriously. We (men) will never understand how and why half the stuff is in there.

Time Magazine

cuckoo wrote: »

I've done that too - i was involved in sexual health campaigns while in college, so people would have known my face as 'oh, that girl with all the condoms'

And the girl who gave me the tour; but I'm glad you know that I (among others) always labelled you

seanybiker

Tis weird that she wont leave you carry em around. Whats good for the goose and all that.
Womens bags should only be opened by women. My missus asks me to get things out of her bag I actually freeze up. You can find anything in there. Nobody knows why its there, not even the woman. Humans know more about space and the deep sea than they do about a womans bag. Main reason is fear.

The Sweeper

I have a measuring tape in my bag.

Is it because I've just moved house and want to be able to measure every piece of furniture or item of window dressing I see?

Or, is it because I want to be able to measure the penis of the man I'm cheating with so I can record it in my log book?

<__<
>__>

helimachoptor

partyguinness wrote: »

In fairness I didnt give them to her...but its interesting to note that she would have issues with me carrying them around...

Did she steal them then?

partyguinness wrote: »

They are actually mine from a pack I bought about 18 months ago and before I met her. I teased her about why she would carry them as we do not use them.

Boston

I'm surprised this hasn't been said, but you shouldn't use those condoms. In all likely hood two single loose condoms, in a typical woman's handbag for 18 months, have been damaged. What with the constant rubbing up against other objects like rosary beads and knitting needles in the hand bag. For the same reason you shouldn't carry them in a wallet.

astrofool

Minesajackdaniels wrote: »

I have a measuring tape in my bag.

Is it because I've just moved house and want to be able to measure every piece of furniture or item of window dressing I see?

Or, is it because I want to be able to measure the penis of the man I'm cheating with so I can record it in my log book?

<__<
>__>

I'd say the log book would cause more of a worry than the tape measure.

Boston

Boston wrote: »

I'm surprised this hasn't been said, but you shouldn't use those condoms. In all likely hood two single loose condoms, in a typical woman's handbag for 18 months, have been damaged. What with the constant rubbing up against other objects like rosary beads and knitting needles in the hand bag. For the same reason you shouldn't carry them in a wallet.

has been said but should be emphasised

TheBigLebowski

Minesajackdaniels wrote: »

I have a measuring tape in my bag.

Is it because I've just moved house and want to be able to measure every piece of furniture or item of window dressing I see?

Or, is it because I want to be able to measure the penis of the man I'm cheating with so I can record it in my log book?

<__<
>__>

That's all very well and it would appear that the first option would be the obvious choice seeing that measuring furniture etc would be a normal use for most people with a measuring tape.

However, condoms only have one use for the OP's GF whether it be with the OP or someone else.

So I guess what I'm saying is from your analogy it would be safe to assume that you want to measure furniture as it is the obvious choice. Likewise the obvious choice for the OP is that she intends for them to be used and from what he has stated, she is unlikely to be going places or going out with other people that would need them.

Also her lack of response to the question considering she is in her thirties and presumably has some level of maturity would be a concern. If there was a legitimate reason, I would expect a mature 30 something year old to say simply, "I have the condoms in case i forget my pill" or whatever else the reason may be.

smileykey

Dude, she's had condoms in her bag for 18 months and hasn't ha reason to use them. If there was 2, then 1 and then none I'd worry but since they're still there I reckon you're safe enough.

As for the whole "would a woman carry around a condom is she had no intention of using it?" question that you appear to be implicitly asking the answer is yes. I'm a lesbian, in a committed relationship who has never used a condom and yet I often carry them around, right beside the plasters in my wallet. Because, like the plasters, I may never need them, but there's always going to be someone out there who does and I've often had to give them to people. In fact, no condom has ever gone out of date in my wallet they're given out so often.

DM-BM

smileykey wrote: »

Dude, she's had condoms in her bag for 18 months and hasn't ha reason to use them. If there was 2, then 1 and then none I'd worry but since they're still there I reckon you're safe enough.

Has anybody actually read what the OP has posted, He bought the condoms 18 months ago, he hadn't even met his present girlfriend at the time.
The condoms are in her bag for only a few weeks.
She has a problem with him carrying condoms, but doesn't even bother to offer an explanation as to why she is carrying them, if it's as perfectly innocent as most people here seem to think it is, ( and it certainly could be ) why not just explain the situation properly.

Fauldy Banny

If that was me I would not be happy, if she had shrugged it off and told you they were there from ages ago and hadn't bothered to take them out I could except that but she didn't, why?

Defo something suspicious.

partyguinness

Fauldy Banny wrote: »

If that was me I would not be happy, if she had shrugged it off and told you they were there from ages ago and hadn't bothered to take them out I could except that but she didn't, why?

Defo something suspicious.

Well thats what I am concerned about...I cant go throwing accusations around..seriously I am going to mark the condoms with some highlighter very subtly and check back in a few weeks..but it really isnt good if I'm having to do that in a relationship..

I dont think she is cheating or wants to..but I'm sure everyone says that dont they??

CeilingCat

partyguinness wrote: »

I am thinking of marking them with some sort of invisible ink and checking every few weeks to see it the same ones are still there..lol..or expertly putting chilly pepper under the foil...:P:P

Open the packets real careful like, and write 'HOW COULD YOU?!' on the condoms, then roll them back up and re-seal them into the packets. Alternatively, you could just draw a big scary face on there, so it'd expand when it was put on.

Don't forget you did it and use the condom though.... you'd give yourself a terrible fright.... :eek:

If she was cheating or had the intention of cheating, I don't think she'd be careless enough to leave them in her bag, and then ask you to get something from it.... just doesn't make sense.

Pythia

Although they are probably there because she hasn't cleaned her bag, I would be worried if you saw them in there again.

newmills

partyguinness wrote: »

I have been with my girlfriend for over a year and she is on the pill. I see her every weekend. During Xmas I was with her and getting keys out of her handbag (at her request) and I saw that she had two condoms in her bag (unopened for you smartasses).

They are actually mine from a pack I bought about 18 months ago and before I met her. I teased her about why she would carry them as we do not use them.

She lauged it off and in truth gave me no plausible explanation. I didnt dwell on it as I didnt want any arguments during xmas. She admitted that she would be concerned if I was carrying them around.

What shoud I think of this?

It's very strange as i'm sure she doesn't even have a penis!!:D

Nevyn

So unless you have a penis you should be carrying condoms ?

newmills

Thaedydal wrote: »

So unless you have a penis you should be carrying condoms ?

Sorry mod was being light hearted - as in the joke about the 3 guys talking about their wives. Mine brought home 3 bottles of wine from hols and she doesn't even drink. Mine brought home 200 cigarettes and she doesn't even smoke. That's nothing, mine went with 30 condoms and she doesn't even have a penis!!:D:D

MagicMarker

Errr.... if they've been there for 18 months she's hardly using them!!

I have a lighter in my car..... I don't smoke.

Ghost Train

MagicMarker wrote: »

Errr.... if they've been there for 18 months she's hardly using them!!

I have a lighter in my car..... I don't smoke.

Would think the same.

joeybarton=hero

shes using them for water balloon fights !!! or else possibly cheating or a just incase situation arises !! best advice is if it bothers u enough to post on boards just ask her why!!! prob a genuine reason !!!

consultech

This is a bit of an extreme case, and is an exception for the most part;

But a mate of mine caught his girlfriend out cheating in a similar scenario a few months back (she was not on the pill, and carried 2 condoms around in her purse). The individual foil packaging always seemed to look very new, and not worn at all, despite being there a few weeks/months sometimes cause he generally had that end of things covered. He decided to put a black dot from a permanent marker on the back of both individual condom wrappers...and well you can probably guess the rest next time he checked them.

Prob not a cause to be paranoid tho, this girl was a bitch.

EDIT:

partyguinness wrote: »

seriously I am going to mark the condoms with some highlighter very subtly and check back in a few weeks.

Didn't actually see this before my post - Must be a standard approach! Use perm marker tho, just a dot, highlighter is crap and wont take to the foil.