Nights out at Christmas

leahyl

Hi. I know this is kind of stupid but i need to get it off my chest!Basically i love Christmas (favourite time of year) but one thing i don't like is why people always feel they have to go out drinking on Stephens night (it's like they can't wait to get more drink down their throat!). I don't like pubs at the best of times but it's the one thing i hate about Christmas cos inevitably my friends will be going out Stephens night but it's always so busy and uncomfortable in town - i'd much prefer to stay at home and have a quiet drink and watch 'boring telly'!. But at the same time i feel like the odd one out and that i'm missing out on something if you know what i mean but i knw that if i did go i'd have a miserable time cos i wouldn't be able to have a proper conversation with anyone without shouting my head off! I just hate the fact that everything revolves around the pub! Doesn't anyone go to friends houses anymore and have a few drinks there - that's way more fun!I guess it's really just the pub environment i don't like and the fact that i dnt feel particularly safe in town at night. What does everyone think?:)

BroomBurner

Could you invite everyone to your house? That way it would be the best of both worlds.

SpitfireIV

leahyl wrote: »

What does everyone think?:)

Hi leahyl,

I can sympothise with you, I'm not a pub/club person either, in fact (and believe this!) in my short life thus far (25 years :P) I've only ever been in a night club twice! TWICE!! and those two times have only been in the past 3 months or so! :pac:.

For the same reason as yourself I just cant cope in pubs and clubs. Pubs are hard enough to chat in and as for clubs, hah, forget it, whenever anyone says anything to me I just keep nodding and agreeing as if I know what they are saying. Besides that, clubs especially seem to be full of people with ermm, how would I say it? 'loose morals'? and guys prancing about thinking they are gods gift :P that really gets to me, perhaps if I were drunk it wouldnt, but I dont drink. Of course then you have the issue that all your mates are getting drunker and drunker (or stupider and stupider? :P) whilst you are sitting there the same as when you came in, have to admit though, it is fun to watch my mates getting drunk

I guess they are ok on the odd occasion as a chance to let your hair down and unwind a bit, and I'd prefer to keep it that way, an odd treat .

Hmm, this got me thinking, I really need to start a 'non drinkers - alternative evening' club or group in my town!

leahyl

CroppyBoy1798 wrote: »

Hi leahyl,

I can sympothise with you, I'm not a pub/club person either, in fact (and believe this!) in my short life thus far (25 years :P) I've only ever been in a night club twice! TWICE!! and those two times have only been in the past 3 months or so! :pac:.

For the same reason as yourself I just cant cope in pubs and clubs. Pubs are hard enough to chat in and as for clubs, hah, forget it, whenever anyone says anything to me I just keep nodding and agreeing as if I know what they are saying. Besides that, clubs especially seem to be full of people with ermm, how would I say it? 'loose morals'? and guys prancing about thinking they are gods gift :P that really gets to me, perhaps if I were drunk it wouldnt, but I dont drink. Of course then you have the issue that all your mates are getting drunker and drunker (or stupider and stupider? :P) whilst you are sitting there the same as when you came in, have to admit though, it is fun to watch my mates getting drunk

I guess they are ok on the odd occasion as a chance to let your hair down and unwind a bit, and I'd prefer to keep it that way, an odd treat .

Hmm, this got me thinking, I really need to start a 'non drinkers - alternative evening' club or group in my town!

Thanks for your input! I feel the same - i don't think people realise how hard it is for people who don't like pubs and clubs. It's just assumed - especially by older people- that all young people love going out getting drunk every weekend when the reality for me is that i have NEVER been drunk! It just doesnt interest me! My friends aren't like that either but they would go out more often than i would. I just don't think i should have to pretend to like something when i clearly don't!

Of course there is a downside in that theres not much else you can do except go to the cinema! I like goin to the cinema but theres only so many times you can go. I don't mind goin to nice quiet, cosy pubs where you can hear one another.

Also i guess i kinda worry that i won't meet anybody since i prob associate going out with meeting someone if you know what i mean. I mightnt come across as unconfident/shy but i actually am very that way when it comes to relationships and that so being in an environment i'm not really comfortable with doesn't help! I'm off on a rant again! ha:D

SpitfireIV

leahyl wrote: »

I just don't think i should have to pretend to like something when i clearly don't!

You dont have to pretend at all, I dont, I make no scruples about the fact that I dont drink, sure, you might get the odd look now and then (I'm gonna say that its even harder for guys who dont drink, sorry , but surely guys ARE expected to be drinkers?) but recently, perhaps since my mates and such have grown up a little they respect the fact that I dont drink, and can go out and have a good night without the need for drink. I like being a little different, setting myself apart from the crowd, and as I'm pretty shy also I can, in some way, gain something by having my pride and refusing to drink.

leahyl wrote: »

Of course there is a downside in that theres not much else you can do except go to the cinema! I like goin to the cinema but theres only so many times you can go. I don't mind goin to nice quiet, cosy pubs where you can hear one another.

Have you ever put out any feelers? ie tried to get a group together locally of likeminded people who would like an alternative to drinking and noisy pubs? Could be interesting, a sort of 'get together' every so often to have a relaxed, drink free night and have a chat, cinema, do an activity etc? You might meet some very similar people and of course make new friends.

leahyl wrote: »

Also i guess i kinda worry that i won't meet anybody since i prob associate going out with meeting someone if you know what i mean. I mightnt come across as unconfident/shy but i actually am very that way when it comes to relationships and that so being in an environment i'm not really comfortable with doesn't help! I'm off on a rant again! ha:D

I do know what you mean alright, seems if you want to pick up someone a pub/club is the place to be! But think about it, is that really the case? It might appear to be, but I'd bet a large number of 'relationships' that start in such places are pretty superficial and fade away quicker than the hangover. If pubs/clubs aint your thing then I very much doubth you are gonna meet someone there as you just wont be yourself or in an environment that you are comfortable with, and as you said yourself its not the best place for having a good chat. You need to be somewhere where you are at your best and being yourself of course.

I see the guys I do be with and they have no problems at all with sailing up to some random girls and getting on great with them, now, they claim that being a wee bit tipsy gives you increased powers (or more self confidence ) so maybe thats the trick? I dont know, tis a strange one!

If nothing else you're a good ranter :pac: I joke! Happy Christmas.