Need a bit more advice with girlfriend issue.

Captain Ginger

A while ago I made a thread about a girl I was going out with and how she was pregnant with another mans child and was getting an abortion.

Now I seek more advice she went off and had it and doesn't come home for another week, she went over with her family who know nothing about this for the record and as much as I wanted to go over with her it was not possible due to my current financial situation.

So she's over there alone with her problem and the only proper contact I get is the odd call and over text. I asked her how she was and she doesn't want to talk about it (I can understand not wanting to talk about it, especially not face to face. Anyway, I don't think she want's to talk about it all, and myself and the father (who wants nothing to do with it) are the only ones who know.

I'm no Doctor but I can't imagine bottling all of this up inside is a good thing, at the same time I don't want to push her with it, I really want to show her I'll be there to listen to her if and when she wants to talk about it, but I'm not to sure what to do and what to expect, a part of me thinks I'm making a mountain out a molehill here.

Sorry for the rant but needed to shoot it all out there.

Any advice would be great.

(On a side note, this girl is the best thing that's ever happened to me, I have never felt like this before.)

RedXIV

you kinda are making it a bit bigger than it needs to be. She'll talk to you if she needs to. I'm gonna guess that she already knows that if she needs someone to lean on, you're her man. If her family don't know and the father isn't interested, you're really her only option. But don't keep badgering her to talk about it. Be sensitive to the fact that she's going through something difficult but don't let it dominate your converstation or life. If you can, distract her. Thats probably what she will prefer at this stage anyway.

Best of Luck with her btw

Red

dontcallmecrazy

give her a chance, if she is over there with other people who dont know what she is going through well then she prob just wants to put it to the back of her mind untill she gets back home so as to keep up a front. she knows that you are there for her and willing to listen etc. so just let her be, im sure she feels under enough pressure already, just let her do what she has to do in her own time, unless of course its becoming very apparent to you that she serioudly needs help further down the line.

all you can do is be at her disposal...im sure she woudl appreciate some normality around her also.

if shes not into talking write her a letter just letting her know you are there for her and support her etc.

davmol

A bit of topic here but im assuming she didnt sleep with this 'other' man while she was with you?

Captain Ginger

@Dave, no it was just before we got together.

@Everyone else, yeah you're right that's what I intend to do, but from what I can see she's beating herself up about it pretty bad and trying not to show it, and from what I can see I think a lot of this has to do with her not wanting to burdon me with it incase I just walk away since she doesn't see it as my problem (which it isn't but I jsut want her to be happy, so anything that upsets her in a way upsets me).