My Wedding DVD is ruined

kelcol

Have any of you married folk had most of your mass cut out of your wedding DVD. We are missing at least one third of our wedding DVD as the videographer said that it was common practise not to video from the OUR FATHER to the end of communion out of respect to the congregtion. Have any of you heard of such a thing???:mad:

deisebabe

umm no. well our guy videoed that part. course he was cr*p. the dvd was watched once and binned could be worse!!!!

Hagar

God be with the days when marriage was a sacrament not a scene in a movie.

Ebonyellie

Im sorry about your wedding dvd, i know how you feel kinda, the person we got to film ours is an aunty of my husbands and a supposed "professional" what happened was in the church before the ceremony she only filmed his side of the church, his friends, his relatives, she kept the camera focused on him and his ALL DAY, there is no footage of my family at all except a quick glimpse as they pass by. The worst bit was, my brother who was in america could not be there so he sent a special letter to be read out at the speeches, she didnt record it al all. I couldnt even send him a copy as he didnt know my husbands relatives and none of his were featured. I only watched the dvd once and 2 years on i still cant bring myself to watch it, im barely in it myself. I know there are worse things going on in the world and it seems silly to be bothered but it did upset me. We only asked her because she is the type that would be offended if we asked someone else, and she was already put out because it was a no kids wedding and her ill mannered kids couldnt come. I hope you can look at your wedding DVD and pick out the nice things about it, its totally understandable to be annoyed, i hope you had good memories despite the setback

Glowing

Surely all it would be are people queuing up the church aisle? Hmm exciting?!

mikeanywhere

kelcol wrote: »

Have any of you married folk had most of your mass cut out of your wedding DVD. We are missing at least one third of our wedding DVD as the videographer said that it was common practise not to video from the OUR FATHER to the end of communion out of respect to the congregtion. Have any of you heard of such a thing???:mad:

I work with video guys all the time and it really depends on the guy himself. However, it is common practice NOT to film every second of the service.

kelcol

Glowing wrote: »

Surely all it would be are people queuing up the church aisle? Hmm exciting?!

Its a little more than that, there was an extremely emotional part during the 'sign of peace' that I thought would never happen. It was something I would love to have seen again.
I guess my point is we paid this guy alot of money to film our wedding day, and he took the decision upon himself what parts to fillm. That should have been our decision if we were left make it.
I am adopted and I was soooo delighted that my two families were under the one roof for such a short period of time and for somebody to come and take away the proof of these memories is dispicable... Thats all...

bensoneb

Hi Kelcol,

Oh God, what a moment to miss! It must have been a very special occasion for you in more ways than one. Is there a chance that anyone else at the wedding may have been filming during that time?

Really he should have explained what he was going to do beforehand so that you would have had a chance to say yea or nea to his plans!

Maybe other posters should hold back on the sarcastic comments until they have the full story on something. This was possibly a once in a lifetime occasion for you and I can really understand why you're upset about this.

Regards,

axel rose

Kelcol,
I dont know how long ago your wedding was so please dont take this the wrong way .......but you need to chose your arguments. So you dont have the mass recorded-its not like anyone wont believe that you got married.
Trust me Im speaking as a bride who got married abroad with very few family members......the company organising the wedding forgot to book a photographer! (also forgot to book our honeymoon :eek:) So yea I have my guests photos, a few by the manager of the hotel and my brother in laws recording. (from the pov of best man ).

Guess what? I had a great day, and brilliant memories. Im sure a lot of people would confirm that the DVD is rarely watched, and if it is most just fast foward to the reception.
The important thing is that you had a great day and a happy future.

bensoneb

Axel Rose,

You're missing the point completely. The reason Kelcol is upset is because her birth family and her adoptive family were together and the videographer missed this very poignant moment during the sign of peace. I suppose people who aren't adopted don't really understand what a major event in someone's life this is.

axel rose

I dont think I am. Ok the wedding mass was emotional as it was about the joining of three families- I get that but I think that is a bit rich to say that the DVD is 'ruined'. If the mass was so important to the OP then she should have specified that she wanted it recorded.

Adopted or not weddings are important, my mother had cancer, my father and my husbands parents were unable to attend, my wedding wasnt recorded or photographed,(professionally) and I had a complete stranger sitting in the front row (ahead of sister inlaw ) BUT my wedding was a brilliant.

I made sure that my memories were not going to be the sh1t things that went wrong. I suggest that the OP should concentrate on what she does have- a supportive family, great husband, and a DVD that shows the families having a wonderful time at the reception.

DotOrg

kelcol wrote: »

Have any of you married folk had most of your mass cut out of your wedding DVD. We are missing at least one third of our wedding DVD as the videographer said that it was common practise not to video from the OUR FATHER to the end of communion out of respect to the congregtion. Have any of you heard of such a thing???:mad:

just wondering what you had discussed with the videographer before the wedding? Did he ask lots of questions as to what you wanted filmed? Or did you just presume he'd know the bits you wanted?

When I prepare photographing at a couples wedding, I'd talk to the couple a few times before the weddinga nd do a comprehensive question sheet to know exactly what they want.

Did you end up paying for the video? Did you bring up all the issues with the videographer?

kelcol

axel rose wrote: »

I dont think I am. Ok the wedding mass was emotional as it was about the joining of three families- I get that but I think that is a bit rich to say that the DVD is 'ruined'. If the mass was so important to the OP then she should have specified that she wanted it recorded.

I did let the videographer know what I wanted recorded, I mailed it to him he just didnt do as I asked... And guys never once did I say that I didnt enjoy my Wedding day it was the most magical day of my life. I just wish that those apecial moments had been captured on DVD. After all that is what I paid for..

axel rose

Kelcol,
you neglected to mention the fact that you had asked him to record the mass. How was I (and the other posters) to assume this?

Im glad that you have this in perspective, if you ever read weddingsonline some brides can get a little 'dramatic' to say the least. :rolleyes:. ( Although from what you describe I wouldnt say that the DVD is 'ruined')

What did the videographer say when you reminded him of your instructions? Did you actually specify that you wanted the mass as opposed to the cermony recorded?

Have you asked your guests to see if they have the mass recorded?

smelltheglove

I am almost 1 year married and a photographer. Heres my take as a bride. I asked for msot of the church to be cut when I was given the preview, I dont see the point of sitting through the whole service, I have no interest in watching mine over and over and wouldnt have any interest in watching someone elses. However I did request all the important parts to be left, any parts that would be significant in the day just not ramblings.....

Ok I would be a bit miffed. I was a bit miffed there were a few things I askedc my videographer to do that were not done but at the end of the day things change on the day sometimes there is something very significant going on in one place that seems more important to the videographer.

Professionally I have seen videographers not record the whole lot, I have seen photographers leave after rings out of respect for congregation, old school, so I am guessing your videographer is an older member of the trade. Did you have a contract? Within my contract I explain to clients that I endeavour to capture all the shots requested but cannot be held responsible if the opportunity is not there, if due to natural processes of the day it is unavoidable etc etc

Also there is the 'feeling'. With weddings I get very involved, me being a real girly girl I love weddings and I want to capture the little hand grips, the tears, the smiles everything, I find it so amazingly beautiful I often end up with hundreds of shots. On the other hand I cover a variety of events, music being a big one, and I need the feeling to take me to get what I want. Not saying your videographer was not interested in your wedding but maybe his heart isnt in it anymore. Photography and videography may be professions but in reality they are art forms, I suppose more so photography, but it is all got to do with being taken by the moment, catching the detail, the emotion and maybe your guy needs a break.

There is nothing you can do right now about it. Time has been and gone and you cannot recreate it but you can let him know your disappointment. Make it clear to him that you understand he cannot recreate it, if there is no footage you need to accept that but he needs to know where he has gone wrong. He may look after you he may not, you know if he doesnt you name and shame.


I'm a soppy sod - sorry

cch

There's every chance that if he had been filming during the sign of peace then he would have been scanning the crowd not just focussing on the people involved anyway.

If such a moment happened anywhere else where filming it wouldn't have been a consideration, would you still be rueing not capturing it on film or treasuring the memory for what it was?

stinkybum

In hindsight, i'm really really disappointed with my videographer too. I gave him a list of who was who at the wedding and he only managed to video some of my friends and most of DH's family. Whats worse is that DH's family were slagging off my family and he still left the footage in. There was NO footage of the bridesmaids or bestmen, none of my family or my flowergirls, none of DH's friends at all and because he screwed up the addresses, there was no (to us) precious footage of DH getting ready at our home with his friends.
We should have had it out with him but DH was really unwell after the wedding and then our daughter was born 10 wks early 3 months after the wedding and we just never got around to it. I was really let down, esp since the DVD is a constant reminder of how badly behaved our DH's family was that day and why we havnt spoken to them since
I also wish there was some footage of my family that day. They were so wonderful. My sisters arent even in the background anywhere.

Chinafoot

cch wrote: »

There's every chance that if he had been filming during the sign of peace then he would have been scanning the crowd not just focussing on the people involved anyway.

This is what popped into my head.

OP you said yourself that it was a moment that you didn't think would happen. How could you or the videographer have anticipated that? Did you specifically tell him to focus on the people involved during the 'sign of peace' moment?

Did you go to him after the mass and ask him if he managed to record the moment in question? Saying you told him to record the mass doesn't mean that moment would have been captured.

If this moment in question is the only reason you're upset, and if you didn't ask him to focus on the people in question (which you couldn't have, since you didn't think it would ever happen, right?), then I think you're being irrational.

The moment happened, and its something you won't forget. The memory will still be there, regardless of it being on DVD or not.

smelltheglove

Well said China and also some moments are better left in memory than on film as the signifcance gets washed away by repeat.

For anyone who hasnt gotten married reading this I would recommend my dvd guys, there were 3 but usually 2, 1 was training, www.wedding-dvd.ie really really good.