Photography

Bernard Black

Why is it that nowadays everyone with a camera thinks they are a photographer? I mean just because your camera has a black and white function and you take a picture of an overturned wheelbarrow does NOT mean your a creative genius or are 'deep'.

Bernard Black

Bernard Black wrote: »

Why is it that nowadays everyone with a camera thinks they are a photographer? I mean just because your camera has a black and white function and you take a picture of an overturned wheelbarrow does NOT mean your a creative genius or are 'deep'.

yeh it does

Vain

Jealously is a crime.

Turd Ferguson

Deleted User wrote: »

yeh it does

You heard it here first folks.
Thank you and goodnight...

dr.bollocko

I only use my camera to take photographs of my genitalia for Christmas cards. If you put the yoke up to 16x zoom you can see freckles.

Turd Ferguson

dr.bollocko wrote: »

I only use my camera to take photographs of my genitalia for Christmas cards. If you put the yoke up to 16x zoom you can see freckles.

I tried that, but my photo just looks like this

CreepingDeath

Bernard Black wrote: »

Why is it that nowadays everyone with a camera thinks they are a photographer?

Mainly cos it's easy to do... not a proper job at all

dr.bollocko

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

I tried that, but my photo just looks like this

That's beautiful work. The focus on the centre crab leading to a blur of red.
You are clearly a professional genital photograher. I am but a keen amateur enthusiast.

I have so much to learn.

dr.bollocko

dr.bollocko wrote: »

I only use my camera to take photographs of my genitalia for Christmas cards. If you put the yoke up to 16x zoom you can see freckles.

hope I'm on your mailing list

dr.bollocko

Deleted User wrote: »

hope I'm on your mailing list

Nobody whose username is so long that it sends the side darker blue bar out of line with all the rest of the blue bars are on my genitalia based mailing lists.
You just get the hairy ass card reserved for all my enemies.:D

aw sorry for messin up your blue line. Didn't know it meant so much to you.

dr.bollocko

Deleted User wrote: »

aw sorry for messin up your blue line. Didn't know it meant so much to you.

Thats ok. You can have a picture of my knob now along with my humblest apologies.

Turd Ferguson

dr.bollocko wrote: »

I have so much to learn.

Well, send me a pic of your penis and I can judge it for you and give you some pointers
:pac:

big b

Business a bit slow, Bernard?

dr.bollocko

dr.bollocko wrote: »

Thats ok. You can have a picture of my knob now along with my humblest apologies.

can I still have the pic of your hairy ass though? was so looking forward to that

javaboy

Bernard Black wrote: »

Why is it that nowadays everyone with a camera thinks they are a photographer?

Wiktionary wrote:

Verb
to photograph

to photograph (third-person singular simple present photographs, present participle photographing, simple past and past participle photographed)

So if someone takes a photograph they are photographing which makes them a photographer. As long as they take photographs, they are a photographer. End of story.

If you're not feeling exclusive enough now that everyone and his mother has a digital camera, then why not stick the word professional in front of your title? Or you could call yourself a "photographic artiste".

That would distinguish you from all those impertinent wannabees who dared to pick up a camera.

Kintarō Hattori

Bernard Black wrote: »

Why is it that nowadays everyone with a camera thinks they are a photographer? I mean just because your camera has a black and white function and you take a picture of an overturned wheelbarrow does NOT mean your a creative genius or are 'deep'.

What's the problem with people enjoying a bit of photography?

Bob the Builder

I am calling myself a photographer and have a €400 camera in the hope that someday i'll be commissioned to photograph nude supermodels.

Then all i'll have to do is bring contraception.

HIRED

next....

Granny Lover

Thank GOD someone said it, with people that go to Argos and buy High MP cameras and then think they r pros even though they take noting but out of focus digital over zoomed up photos that are really bad but they still insist on showing them to people on facebook and bebo im so sick of it and think someone should but i stop to this and this is the first step!

pickarooney

Are you sure you got the right Dylan Moran sit-com character there OP?

Bernard Black

Bernard Black wrote: »

Im sorry im not quite sure exactly what you want me to say?I mean i can do some childish crabs jokes if ya want,i dunno maybe ya want me to crack a few fart jokes as well sure?Or perhaps threatin to send a picture of a hairy arse...HILLARIOUS.you know what else is rather funny? A man dressed in womens clothing!!

you should have posted in photography if you had wanted a serious response, this, however, is afterhours, welcome!

javaboy

Bernard Black wrote: »

Im sorry im not quite sure exactly what you want me to say?I mean i can do some childish crabs jokes if ya want,i dunno maybe ya want me to crack a few fart jokes as well sure?Or perhaps threatin to send a picture of a hairy arse...HILLARIOUS.you know what else is rather funny? A man dressed in womens clothing!!

He means it looks like you're a professional photographer who is bitter that the ready availability of high end digital cameras to the average Joe has negatively affected your business.

I hate explaining jokes.

Granny Lover

Granny Lover wrote: »

Thank GOD someone said it, with people that go to Argos and buy High MP cameras and then think they r pros even though they take noting but out of focus digital over zoomed up photos that are really bad but they still insist on showing them to people on facebook and bebo im so sick of it and think someone should but i stop to this and this is the first step!

oh sh*t. are we not supposed to take photos and show them to everyone weknow? crap, I should hire a photographer to come on girly nights out with me so they can ensure they capture me in the best light while I'm falling over drunk.
:rolleyes:

javaboy

Domo230 wrote: »

I painted this

I am a great artist :P

I see your black spot and raise you John Cage's 4'33":

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04F22C_u658

Kintarō Hattori

Bernard Black wrote: »

you know what else is rather funny? A man dressed in womens clothing!!

No, that's just freaky.

Bernard Black

Kintarō Hattori wrote: »

What's the problem with people enjoying a bit of photography?

Not a thing,in fact i support it..it's a great hobby,gets people out into the fresh air and the like BUT when people come up to me with their developed picture of a tree after losing its leaves, from their 5 euro disposable camera,forgive me for being a tad upset!

javaboy

Bernard Black wrote: »

Not a thing,in fact i support it..it's a great hobby,gets people out into the fresh air and the like BUT when people come up to me with their developed picture of a tree after losing its leaves, from their 5 euro disposable camera,forgive me for being a tad upset!

So what if the disposable camera only cost 5 euro? Some of the best music was recorded on cheap instruments. Any decent artist worth their salt will tell you that it's not the camera that makes the photo, but the photographer.

I understand if you want think they're a complete twat for taking a photo on a crappy disposable camera but being upset by people taking pictures is really just a bit sad. Leave them be, they're doing noone any harm.

DonkeyStyle \o/

I found some black and white shots of overturned wheelbarrows.
http://www.flickr.com/search/?q=overturned+wheelbarrow&m=text
Hope that helps.

big b

javaboy wrote: »

He means it looks like you're a professional photographer who is bitter that the ready availability of high end digital cameras to the average Joe has negatively affected your business.

I hate explaining jokes.

Glad you did. I was losing the will to live & couldn't be arsed.

Maybe I can get a professional to capture my angst & photoshop it onto an overzoomed close-up of Kathryn Thomas's genitalia.

Bernard Black

DonkeyStyle \o/ wrote: »

I found some black and white shots of overturned wheelbarrows.
http://www.flickr.com/search/?q=overturned+wheelbarrow&m=text
Hope that helps.

Ha that is quality......finally someone with a sense of humour:)

Kintarō Hattori

Bernard Black wrote: »

Not a thing,in fact i support it..it's a great hobby,gets people out into the fresh air and the like BUT when people come up to me with their developed picture of a tree after losing its leaves, from their 5 euro disposable camera,forgive me for being a tad upset!

Well instead of being annoyed with them why not offer constructive criticism and some words of encouragement?

dr.bollocko

I have a good mate whose only annoying trait is his want to carry one of those fold away to nothing tripods and his camera around everywhere out of the ordinary we might go.
And its always pictures of foggy oceans or one old tractor-wheel in a mound of durt or some ould sod looking the other way or wrecked old buildings or some boring ****e. That all has its place but amongst friends it just gets boring looking at the same abstract nonsery from a slightly different angle for a half a day. Never anything useful like a couple of big smiley faces you can look back at years later and enjoy.
I got into photoshop but it is dull and disappointing for a while until you get really at ease with graphical manipulaton and to be honest I tend to look back at anything I mess with and just prefer the blurry smiling pictures.
Speaking of which I really need to replace my digital camera.

oeb

Bernard Black wrote: »

Not a thing,in fact i support it..it's a great hobby,gets people out into the fresh air and the like BUT when people come up to me with their developed picture of a tree after losing its leaves, from their 5 euro disposable camera,forgive me for being a tad upset!

You know what I hate? All these people on computers stealing my jobs. Back in the day I could say "I work with computers!" and people would say "Are they like them things on star-trek" and I would say "NO YOU IDIOT THOSE ARE TRIBBLES". And then they would cry.

Or, you know, you could just be happy that the fact that any muppet can take crap photographs means that your good ones stand out even more. Or happy with the fact that someone who goes out and shells out a grand on a decent SLR will have it available second hand for half nothing for you to buy within a couple of months.

Or you could just get a new hobby that not as many people do. I suggest collecting pokemon cards.

Turd Ferguson

oeb wrote: »

I suggest collecting pokemon cards.

Oh, thats great fun. Anyone want to trade for a Mudkipz?

oeb

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Oh, thats great fun. Anyone want to trade for a Mudkipz?

I can't trade any of mine. I spend too much time on boards, so I alienated all my real life friends. Now all I have is my pokemon cards to keep me company when my internet connection is down. Man, this alter ego of mine is very depressing, I should probably go visit PI. Other peoples problems always cheer me up.