How did you torment your teachers?

Senna

At school how did you tormented your teachers?


We used to shout out 'Harder' in weird voices, drove one particular teacher nuts.
Another teacher was very short, so we'd come to class early and write things on the top of the backboard, like 'bet you cant reach this' and 'look at the short ass' with arrows pointing down.
Another one was very particular about personal hygiene, so whenever she walked through the class we'd start sniffing, made her paranoid in no time.

Xavi6

Ah the good ol' days.

My favourite was when the teacher was writing on the blackboard we'd fire something off the board at an angle so it bounced back and hit her in the face. Could never blame anyone as her back was to the class when it was thrown. Trigonometry ftw!

We also used to play 'Bollox' all the time. For those that don't know, you take it in turns to say the word 'bollox' with the volume increasing each time until you're roaring it.

I always used to correct my English teacher if she made mistakes with grammar etc. Never went down well.

Ruu_Old

Our class drove one into a breakdown, he had to take months off and retired soon after. Vice principal threatened to "call the guards" several times. Threw them snap crackers at the blackboard in metalwork class. Our English teacher had a hatred for American English, the word schedule comes to mind. "No no no, it is pronounced SHED-YULE, not SKED-DULE. Too much American television, that's the problem!" Plenty more stories but that is all I can think of right now. We were little bastards. :pac:

R0ot

Correcting my maths teacher at every single mistake. :pac:

brendansmith

I used to challenge my irish teacher to fights in the yard.
One time i accidently bit her ear off! Talk about embarrassing!:o:o

Crumble Froo

had a teacher with a really large bald patch on his head... used to get in "how do you eat yours" a few dozen times in every class...

Berty

We accidently set fire to his jacket once.

We gave one a mental breakdown.

We stole all 4 alloys off one teachers car.

One guy hid under the desk(with doors) and burst out during the lesson. The teacher was visibly shaken and took the rest of the week off.

One guy was waiting for a student to pull him through a window into the library and give him a good trashing. He grabbed the passing sub teacher instead. Oops.

One guy managed to set fire to the computer in computer class when computers were expensive. Prior the windows days when they cost around £3000 each. Dont ask how he did it but he was **** at computers anyway.

We used to stand on our desks in Irish class and try to convince the teacher we were not standing on our desks.

We all broke out in sporatic violence in the same class, all 36(or so) of us beating the crap of out each other. What was she to do.

After a long long time of hounding that poor young Irish teacher she left and I heard she went to an all girls school were apparently she was not to be messed with and was a completely bitch. Fair play to her at least she learned something from us animals.

BTW never send a young Irish female teacher into a school of boarding students. All those hormones and nothing to do with them.

giggsy664

Ha. We have a studenty teacher on friday for geography.

Fûcking brilliant!

Personally, I like to shout out "BBAAAAAAAA!!!" in class!

Overheal

Brought a stray dog into french class once - it turned out she was a major phobic The majority of the time we'd make sexual moans to make her uncomfortable as hell. It was our version of the bollox game.

Our CSPE teacher was completely OCD - we'd go in with our ties and shirt collars askew, and she'd grind the class to a halt to send people out to straighten up.

We patronised the hell out of our geography teacher. The first few days he thought he was lucky to find a class that actually liked him - oh boy. He used to send people down to the principals office when he started until soon enough the principle musta told him to feck off - we only got worse when we realised it had become an empty threat.

FlutterinBantam

Sit up at the front after a feed of curry/chips/garlic/onions/tayto crisps the night before and unload the most revolting vicious ripe pungent seepers throughout the class.Took some of them 20-30 seconds to seep out like frikken mustard gas.

Turn the two front rows and the podium desK into a Ground Zero .

Ross_Mahon

I had a buzzer from metal work and it sounded like a fly or wasp buzzing about, then fold up a copy and start swiping randomly in mid air.

Them dolly beads made great projectiles in class, somebody hit a teacher in the eye with one and had to get an eye patch! So we would start shouting "YARRRR".

Banging on the tables when the teacher turned around. *We will rock you*

Shouting out the teachers first name in orgasm tone.

Football chants.

Black Swan

When a teen, sat in the front row and flirted with a couple of the male teachers that were relatively young and cute. Success between girls was had if we could get them to lose their train of thought when lecturing.

Caoimhín

I just ignored them.

Slidey

As punishment I was told to clean the blackboard.

I then gave it 6 or 7 coats of Mr Sheen. Ya wanna see the silly cow trying to write on it with chalk after that!

Also replaced the the cartridge in a temp marker with that from a non-temp one. Had the teacher fill the whiteboard with loads of Irish grammar. Was a riot to see her try and wipe it off!

Fozzie Bear

Went to an all boys boarding school.

One evening the boarders gained access to one of the classrooms that was out of sight near the back of the school. (They had left a window partially open) The classroom belonged to one thick, jackass of a teacher we nicknamed BA. They removed everything that would fit out the window and set them all up perfectly as they would have been in the class outside on the lawn. The only difference being they stood on all the desks and chairs and drove the legs down into the grass. My class happened to be the first one using that classroom the next morning. We had the job of bringing all the desks back in. But when setting up the teachers one we bent one leg of his chair up and then all sat down and tried to look serious. He storms back in grabs the wonky chair, sits and all we can see is his two legs going straight up in the air. We sit in stunned, scared ****less silence. Is he dead? Will he box the nearest guy to him who laughs? Then a hand comes up grabs the table edge and he pulls himself up to eye level with the table and glares out at us looking for a victim. All we can see is his big bald dome, his two mad eyes and a hand with the rest of him on the ground behind the desk, but we dared not laugh. It was the single funniest thing I think i seen in all my school days but everyone stared back at him without batting an eyelid. He was hopping mad but we got off scot free!

Another lady we reduced to tears on a regular basis. She was an absolutely stunning looking girl. Tall, well built and the looks of a model. However she was fresh out of training school and she joined an all boys school first thing! We were all hormonal horny little bast@rds and the only way we knew to show her we fancied her was to torture her. Correcting her when she made mistakes, making wild loud animal noises, trying to see who could get as many paper&spit balls through a bic biro "cannon" into her hair without her noticing when her back was to us and a million other stupid childish things. The one that cracked her though and sent her in floods of tears to the president (yes we had a president not a principal) involved a condom. We got into the classroom before her (she was probably in the bathroom giving herself a pep talk in the mirror and chain smoking) and someone slipped a condom over the blackboard duster. She came and the usual corus of zoo animal noises greeted her. Started the class wrote a couple things on the board (for all the good it did us) and then tried to rub the chalk off the board. Nothing happened, she tried again and then stood there looking at the duster in her hand. Her eyes passed over its length, she pulled at the rubber with her finger nails and then she copped the elastic ring at the end. She fired it at the back wall of the classroom, screamed at us, started crying, ran from the classroom locking the door on her way and next thing el Presidente was in front of us. We got weekend detention which meant we had to come in on a saturday and do lessons. She left the school soon after God love her.

Kintarō Hattori

Hmnn the teachers in our school were tough nuts so there was only the odd one or two you could mess with:

Putting the bin or books above the door so when she walked in they fell on top of her
Turning our desks 180 degrees so they faced away from the blackboard
Generally just being giddy and behaving like idiots

Zangetsu

Bollox was a great game, many fond memorys of screaming it in the teachers ears.

We had this one teacher, wasn't able to control the class, must have been 70 odd, old frail man. He'd be standing at the top of the class shouting at everyone for not doing homework, classwork, etc. One day one of the guys stood up and walked to the top of the class and picked him up over his shoulders like a sack of potatoes and started spinning around. Poor old bastard nearly puked everywhere. He made the mistake of not telling the principal so it happened on a regular basis... ALMOST felt bad for him!

ScumLord

Our version of the bollix game was farmyard animal noises.

We drove our technical drawing teacher completely mad. We where in a different building about 5 minutes away form the main school so we got away with murder. When ever he left the room one of the (fat) Lads would jump on his table and start striping. We'd all start singing that old stripping song, turn off the lights and use the projector as a kind of disco light. Other times we'd stack all the tables and chairs into one big pile in the middle of the room. He eventually flipped out and stabbed a student with on of those big compasses and got sent away for a while.

all his replacements got the same treatment. There was a press full of 3D shapes but the press had no glass on the door, somehow the teacher never noticed that. For weeks we had great fun putting the shapes everywhere and watching him put them back, lock the door, inspect the lock. He was in tears when he eventually told him there was no glass on the door. Needless to say those replacement teachers never lasted more than a month.

I wouldn't be a teacher for love nor money. It's hell.

Berty

ScumLord wrote: »

I wouldn't be a teacher for love nor money. It's hell.

We had a teacher who told us he was only in it for the money and the long holidays. We could basically do what we liked and odd that it was that all of us got honours in the subject. Bus Org or business studies for those of us over the age of 21.

The Master

During 5th year we had a very soft spoken very gentle little student teacher first class every day.

Monday morning somebody wrote "penis" in small letters in the corner of the black board , teacher comes in, sees it, rubs it out.

Tuesday morning somebody wrote "penis" in larger letters in the center of the board, teacher rubs it, out asks the class to stop being so childish.

Wednesday morning the word "penis" is written in large letters taking up half of the black board.Teacher rubs it out, goes balistic tell us all to give it up its not funny.

Thursday morning the word "penis" fills the entire blackboard in big thick chalk letters.Teacher sees it, rubs it out, goes mental, threatens to get the principal involved it this dosnt stop.

Friday morning the board is filled with the phrase...

"The more you rub my penis the bigger it gets"

Never saw that teacher again

pierrot

I teach English nowadays, and you'd be surprised how tactics of torment transcend barriers of language and generation, for example, the kids I have now are still quite fond of the 'we will rock you' one, and the 'do exactly as the teacher says' one, which I was a major proponent of still seems to be very popular, i.e- Pierrot standing up. Teacher: "Sit down Pierrot"; Pierrot says 'OK' and sits directly down on the floor, smiling like an imbecile. Teacher: 'Sap'.

demanufactured

We used to play "silent murder"
Basically somebody would shout silent murder ad everyone had to stay quiet , the first person to make a noise would get a thumping.

Darragh29

In secondary school, we used to bring in a universal remote control and when a video was brought in for us to watch, we'd be changing the channel and fu*king with his head!

Also we took screws out of the top and sides of the blackboard so it would be just held up by two screws at the bottom. It rested on the two screws until he came in and started writing on the board, then when he stopped writing and turned his back it would usually come down on top of him!

The auld duster at the top of a slightly open door as well gave us a few laughs...

Darragh29

Humming was another headwrecker for one teacher we had, and when she would walk around trying to identify the hummer, someone else would take it up on the same frequency across the room and the beauty of it was that you could do it with your lips closed through your nose who she couldn't see who was humming!

Turd Ferguson

We had one particular teacher that every time we would hide the blackbord dusters. We used to be in different rooms with her and every time she'd come in, write loads of stuff up and then frantically look for the duster. Throughout the year we compilled about 40 of them and put them on her desk one day. She came in and we were like "Miss, we found you some dusters today"...many lolz


Also in Tech Drawing we used to heat those metal clips with a lighters and throw them on the ground near the teacher. Every single time that idiot would pick them up and burn himself.

Many more stuff that I cant think of...

Darragh29

We nicked chunks of sodium from the science lab and flushed them down the jacks, that was the funniest thing I ever saw, the whole area covered in smoke/fog and the jacks in bits!

shenanigans1982

As has already been said we were fond of the bollox game.

Also used to put thumbthacks on the chairs and wait for the teachers to sit on them. It was better when they tried to continue as if nothing happened rather than jumping back up off the seat.

Used to have a teacher that was a presnter on a well known kids show which led to us answering his questions in really squeeky voices. He didn't last long in the school.

Also had a teacher with a lisp and everyone answered with a lisp, used to throw coins at the board of this teacher trying to get as close as possible without actually hitting him. But we stopped when one day he picked up all the coins and asked us if we had any more because he could do with some extra money.

JJJJNR

One of the lads used to flick snot at the irish teacher when she was writing on the blackboard.

A maths teacher we had took a particular dislike to one of the lads and when someone in the class was misbehaving he would get blamed, no matter what, e.g. say he was on one side of the room and someone banged the radiator on the other side, she would turn around and tell him to stop banging the radiator even though he was on the otherside of the class.. another time couple of the girls were whispering and she asked him to stop..she was crazy but he got his own back one day when he got everyone to sit in different seats, poor woman nearly had a nervous breakdown.

pallepille

i went to 2 secondary schools, the first one was bad (all boys), we had dis crazy art teacher, our class was outside separate from the building in a prefab yoke, the class was on friday mornings so on about 10 thursdays in a row we filled the keyhole with putty so by the time we came for class the next morning it there would be no hope of gettin the key in that lock and we couldnt have the class, hahaha she had to get the locks on dat room changed 8 times in as many weeks,that wasnt the half of it that poor woman ended up leavin before the first few months of the year were over she jus couldnt hack it.The second school i was in was worse (way worse) its was boys and girls, the girls were insane, our whole class (which was the whole 5th year) about 35 people got expelled once, we had the most gullible student religion teacher her first time in dublin after arriving from ballywhereever, we used to throw other peoples school bags at each other when she was writin on the board,she would tell us to pik dem up but we never did so she she always end up doin it herself, anyway one day it got out of hand and when she was picking the contents of one of our bags up, one of the girls stepped up with a puma school bag full of heavy science/history books and bounced it off the back of her head, knocked her clean out. no one owned up and we all got expelled for like 3 weeks till they had to let us back in coz evry1s parents were runnin amok hahaha,, bloody terrible stuff.

FlutterinBantam

:eek:

Words fail me.

Captain Darling

FlutterinBantam wrote: »

:eek:

Words fail me.

More of a fcuking paragraph failure to be honest..........

4zn76tysfajdxp

I never understood why anyone would "torment" a teacher. School was unpleasant enough without having to deal with a screaming teacher or a raving principal giving out about some childish prank.

Nerin

I liked alot of my teachers. Mostly had battles with the vice principle. She was not happy when i turned
18

Slidey

FlutterinBantam wrote: »

:eek:

Words fail me.

They fail him too

Ross_Mahon

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

We had one particular teacher that every time we would hide the blackbord dusters. We used to be in different rooms with her and every time she'd come in, write loads of stuff up and then frantically look for the duster. Throughout the year we compilled about 40 of them and put them on her desk one day. She came in and we were like "Miss, we found you some dusters today"...many lolz


Also in Tech Drawing we used to heat those metal clips with a lighters and throw them on the ground near the teacher. Every single time that idiot would pick them up and burn himself.

Many more stuff that I cant think of...

There was a teacher we had, Who was very fond of his duster, So we robbed it and printed out posters with a picture of his duster asking for a ransom of money! Put them all over the school...He went ballistic!

We presented it to him at the graduation night in front of everyone.

peasant

We used to have a hard-of-hearing French teacher of all things.

He had a hearing aid and would constantly misunderstand the pupils. On top of that he was a right bollox and would shout at you for giving wrong answers and ridicule you in front of the class ...even though your answer was correct, he just didn't hear it right.

On top of that, there was this one shy guy that he always picked on because that guy was to shy to speak up, so yer man man always got him wrong and scalded him.

So one day the class made a pact to get the teacher back. We would only mouth or whisper all conversation and never speak up for the whole class.

So there the teacher was, constantly fiddling with his hearing aid, turning the volume on it ever higher and higher, to the point where you could actually hear the screeching feedback every now and then, it was so loud. But even then we didn't give it away and continued to mouth/whisper.

What we had forgotten though was that our school was in a low fly zone for fighter jets (Germany, cold war and all that). Just when the teacher had the hearing aid at its loudest setting, a jet flew over and produced a sonic boom :eek:

I'd say the poor man's head must have split. He let out an almighty cry of pain, yanked the hearing aid out and ran out the door in tears of pain not to be seen again for the rest of the day.

We DID feel a bit sheepish then ...

patrickc

i got 3,000 lines once for throwing a sheeps heart in biology onto the roof of the class and it stuck, was a substitute teacher too. we also used to throw our history teachers shoes out the window, she was only new god love her.

Frisbee

We used to play Bollix, which is saying Bollix louder and louder.
Mass games of 'Marco, Polo' and 'Hey Bert!' 'Hey Ernie!'

We made one new teacher cry on her second day and she left the school.

In 6th year one of the lads hid under the teachers desk and gradually started stroking the teachers leg, then as the teacher went to look under the des jumped out and kissed him, was fuking hilarious. Teacher didn't even punish him coz he couldn't stop laughing.

Same guy dump tackled the same teacher. He got in trouble for that one...

We used to have to stand up when a teacher entered the room, so one day the two biggest messers in the class sat right in fornt of the teachers desk with there trousers real loose so when they stood up they were bollock naked about 3 foot from the teachers.

Lockstep

I never took part in the teacher baiting as I was a sympethetic kid but the lads in my class locked the music teacher in his cupboard, baaaad thing.

Some french kids stole potassium from the science lab, put it in a jar of water and threw it in the bin,.
cue explosions, fires, the fire brigade being called and us being off school for a week.

ScumLord

peasant wrote: »

On top of that, there was this one shy guy that he always picked on because that guy was to shy to speak up, so yer man man always got him wrong and scalded him.

We had a guy a bit like that in our school. We pinned every thing on him. Anyone sitting in front of him would act like their being stabbed in the back with a compass. Bastard became better at it than anyone. Soon everyone was at it. See who could get someone sent to the principles office for nothing.

Berty

patrickc wrote: »

i got 3,000 lines once for throwing a sheeps heart in biology onto the roof of the class and it stuck, was a substitute teacher too. we also used to throw our history teachers shoes out the window, she was only new god love her.

How did you get her shoes?

Stufinnegan

Xavi6 wrote: »

Ah the good ol' days.

My favourite was when the teacher was writing on the blackboard we'd fire something off the board at an angle so it bounced back and hit her in the face. Could never blame anyone as her back was to the class when it was thrown. Trigonometry ftw!

We used to do this in French Class, we used a golf ball, hit the teacher in the head...she ran off crying to the year head....

Berty

Im out of school a while but

What that metal that kept in oil because when exposed to oxygen its burns real bright and hot.

Well anyway, a guy in science class took it and put it in his back pocket for later. Needless to say his pants and ass caught fire and he dropped like a brick. The teacher was trying to put of the white fire on his ass. We kept telling her we would report her for sexual abuse. She was none too happy.

Another day I was two years ahead and the class was above the science lab. Some guy in his great mind(probably went to Yale) decided to block up a bunsen burner somehow and when the teacher came over the light it there was a gas surge and every bunsen burner went bang. All the windows at that side of the school blew out and our who class shook. We all evacuated down that stairs and out the door next to the science lab.

Remember the cartoons with peoples hair standing up, black faces with a look of shock on them. Imagine around 35 people looking like that.

It was a fun day.

mac123

we had one teacher who just had no control, he was a sub and the whole class used to just humm really loud...hed is that you?? your like nah not me sir and theres still this rouring humm going on..i think he might have had a breakdown in the end, the poor man!

patrickc

quirke_folder wrote: »

How did you get her shoes?

one of the lads just took them and threw them out the window, she was wearing those slip on ones, and her feet where sticking out at the front of the desk, she had no control on the class whatsoever..

Berty

Oh yeah imagine for a moment disecting a frog. Well we also had a battery with a + and - connection near us from the previous physics class. As we had the frogs heart open we decided wouldnt it be fun to restart the frogs heart to see what happens.

Long story short, frogs do not come back to life they simply tend to catch fire. We were not given extra points for our experiment instead a detailed letter home to my parents which I showed them proudly. We all laughed. The frog did not

IronMan

Our varitation on bollox was when the teacher would say anything whilst writing on the board, someone had to say "Lies", "Deception", "Brain-washing" or some other variation on the theme.

Another teacher has an overwhelming fear of butterflies. So we gathered up a couple of hundred of them in jam jars, and let them off in the classroom. The guy was off for a week.

Our PE teacher used to have a FIAT Panda, so about 30 of us picked it up, and hid it round the corner. Hadn't a clue where it went.

Another teacher had a hearing aid, and was quite deaf. So we would all pretend to be shouting, mouth open wide, arm gestures, pointing, while not a word would pass our lips. Poor prick thought he had gone fully deaf.

In woodwork class, we started up the big saw thing, and threw a fake hand covered in blood on the floor. Lad went around the classroom roaring. Teacher came in and went as white as a sheet.

In religion class, we changed the names of the TV channels from RTE1, VIDEO etc to C*UNT, F*CUK, GEE etc.

The milkman used to deliver the milk for the teachers canteen every morning. Some chap got a synringe, filled it with laxative, and proceeded to add it to the milk cartons. An explosive day.

Told a religion teacher that listening to "THE METAL" made us want to kill people, and that we intended to convert her son to the "darkside".

johnnyrotten

I did'nt

book smarts

losers

Berty

book smarts wrote: »

losers

Rather profound of you.

ejmaztec

pallepille wrote: »

i went to 2 secondary schools, the first one was bad (all boys), we had dis crazy art teacher, our class was outside separate from the building in a prefab yoke, the class was on friday mornings so on about 10 thursdays in a row we filled the keyhole with putty so by the time we came for class the next morning it there would be no hope of gettin the key in that lock and we couldnt have the class, hahaha she had to get the locks on dat room changed 8 times in as many weeks,that wasnt the half of it that poor woman ended up leavin before the first few months of the year were over she jus couldnt hack it.The second school i was in was worse (way worse) its was boys and girls, the girls were insane, our whole class (which was the whole 5th year) about 35 people got expelled once, we had the most gullible student religion teacher her first time in dublin after arriving from ballywhereever, we used to throw other peoples school bags at each other when she was writin on the board,she would tell us to pik dem up but we never did so she she always end up doin it herself, anyway one day it got out of hand and when she was picking the contents of one of our bags up, one of the girls stepped up with a puma school bag full of heavy science/history books and bounced it off the back of her head, knocked her clean out. no one owned up and we all got expelled for like 3 weeks till they had to let us back in coz evry1s parents were runnin amok hahaha,, bloody terrible stuff.

All that messing didn't stop you getting your PHD though.