F@ck Buddies - gets complicated!

LegacyUser

When I first came out of a relationship I was crushed, heartbroken and all the rest! But I met this guy (through work) and he we struck up a friendship. He was just out of a relationship also. We ended up sleepin together and now we 2/3mths later we are still at it like rabbits! Now in fairness I still kind of think of him as a really good f@ck! But sometimes he is so sweet and shows real affection. Like the otehr day he was singin and kept whispering n my ear that he loves me when that part came in the song. I was veryquiet - didnt know what to say really! And gettin the odd drunken txt message wit those words in it! Im a bit freaked out but kinda like it all at the same time.

So heres the question - can f@ck buddies become more? As in can we be in a relationship taht will work. I never had a f@ck buddie b4 so I assumed that we would use each other till 1 of us got bored or found sum1 new! But teh sex is too good and we are great friends so it seems inevitable that the next step should be something a bit more serious! Now I should mention that we both have not been wit any1 else since we started gettin it on!

Just lookin for any advice from people who have experienced this good or bad!

Thanks in advance.

Wibbs

So lets recap; you're good mates, compatible, it seems demons in the sack and it sounds like both of you want to make more of it. Ehhhhh hello!! I know married couples who didn't have that at the start. Go for it.

biko

The term f**k buddies should be done away with.
It never ever works for an extended period of time. In the cases where it goes bad it leaves someone really hurt, in the cases it works it deepens into real love.

sorrywhat

id just ask straight out.

i had a f**K bud before for about a year but it wasnt an every weekend kinda thing it was every so often. and we kinda just got fed up of each other. it was just sex.

but this doesnt sound like JUST sex so id ask tbh.

jim o doom

Way I look at it, people can have 1 night stands & not become emotionally attached.. but fook buddies I would view differently.. I think that when you spend that sort of time with someone & you are friends with them, there's probably a good chance of yez ending up together. Regular sex can definitely influence emotions & how you feel towards a person. Sure arn't a large amount of the "love" chemicals released during sex? This would be a good thing in my view, if you are currently looking for a relationship; if you like him - maybe broach the subject and see where ya go!

Oryx

Being someones fcukbuddy doesnt mean you are in a fixed little box where only certain things will ever happen. Its a relationship of a kind, and all relationships have fuzzy edges, where you can overlap into something else. Friends become lovers, lovers become friends... Loving couples can even learn to loathe each other.:D My point is that just because you gave this thing with your man a name: fcukbuddy, does not mean it could never become something else. Sounds like it already has, on his side of things. I say go with the flow, and be open with your feelings instead of pushing them aside cos 'its not meant to happen with us'.

SpookyDoll

Like the otehr day he was singin and kept whispering n my ear that he loves me when that part came in the song. I was veryquiet - didnt know what to say really! And gettin the odd drunken txt message wit those words in it!

Ooohh! I must say that sounds as though he is trying to tell you something! Also the fact that ye have been exclusive seems good.

I cant blame you being cautious or feeling slightly freaked with this stuff coming at you so shortly after the crushing heartbreak!

It seems a little talk is needed methinks!!!

Carra23

Never had a [EMAIL="f@ck"]f@ck[/EMAIL] buddy would love one of them I'd say thats good fun

AnonoBoy

Carra23 wrote: »

Never had a [EMAIL="f@ck"]f@ck[/EMAIL] buddy would love one of them I'd say thats good fun

Thanks for that contribution Carra23.

OP - It sounds like it's developing into more than just sex. Have you guys gone out together for drinks or the cinema or anything 'date-like' at all? If not suggest it - ask him in a light-hearted, jokey way if it'll make it easier. Then once you're on a date, you're gonna have to take the plunge and tell him you want more.

Carra23

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Thanks for that contribution Carra23.

No probs I take it your not being serious about that. I'm no relationship guidance councilor but I think from reading the thread starters 1st post it is blatantly obvious to any1 who can read that there is a strong possibility that there is something more serious than the [EMAIL="f@ck"]f@ck[/EMAIL] buddy scenario evolving with the chap she is seeing. So to offer some serious advice don't dwell on your thoughts and seek some clarity sooner rather than later because if you don't and the fella is'nt feeling the same you will end up getting a little hurt.All the best hope it works out

Mr Benevolent

Can f@ck buddies become more?

Definitely, it's how my girlfriend and I got to know each other. We were FB's for about a year before realising that it wasn't enough, so now we're together for 2 1/2 years and off to Australia for a year in June. It's worked out far better then my previous relationship, mainly because its taken us a long time to get to this stage and get to know each other properly.

LegacyUser

1stly thanks a bunch for ur replies. Heres teh latest!

So after a weekend of avoidence (was in bad form) me and himself had a bit of chat. He I think is a bit scared as am I if Im honest. But this wasnt said but anyways He asked me what are we doing here. So I said lets just go with it and see where it leads and not think about things just go with the flow. So he said fair enough BUT he is afraid of hurting me!!! (never heard that 1 b4) But we agreed to just move things along slowly and no pormise just see where they go if they go anywhere.

Then he txts me sayin really enjoyed himself being wit me blah blah blah and said that he cant make any commitments. But really liked being wit me.Which is fairness I dont really want to make a commitment either( I have a baby) so dont want 2 get too serious too quick either.

But to be honest I ve come to my own conclusion that he has fallen for me big time(and me him) and is really afraid - especially cos I have a baby.

So what do ye think ?