Pregnant and want to quit college

LegacyUser

Im 21, in 3rd year in college and im 11 weeks pregnant i have a higher cert and am doing my ordinary degree

The thing is since ive been back at college im missing loads of time due to all sorts of illness' -throat infections, chest infections the flu and really bad morning sickness.
My immune system is quite low normally (i pick up anything thats going) and since ive become pregnant its worse and i cant take a lot of medicines

I have certs for all of it but i just feel like its a terrible start to the year im missing so many classes and i feel like im beginning to struggle already

My boyfriend keeps telling me to leave and go back next year but i feel really bad i dont want people to think im just quitting because im pregnant . Yet i dont want to struggle and be miserble all year only to have to go back again next year because ive failed.

So should i quit ? or suck it up and stick it out?

Also i dont plan on going on welfare or anything i have a lot of money saved (from working last summer) to tide me over till next year and my BF is in a very well paid job
I would appreciate any advice especially if anyone has been in my situation before

Nevyn

You are pregant.
I would say you need to put your health and the health of the baby you are gestating first.
Some women sail through pregnancy with very little bother but others can have thier health and well being severly impacted. Can you defer the year and start again next year or if your degree is modularised defere the modules after the christmast break ?

Depression during pregnancy due to stress can some times lead to post natal depression,
so congratualtions on the pregnancy and do take care of yourself.

meditraitor

Firstly Congratulations......

I think your boyfriend is right, give up college for a year and take care of yourself and the baby.

Good luck

seahorse

I wouldnt drop out personally OP, because if you think college is tough in pregnancy you should try it with a newborn! I'd keep going for another few weeks, often the sickness of early pregnancy passes in the second trimester, so I'd give that a chance if I were you. Best of luck whatever you decide.

MagicMarker

I wouldn't worry OP, you're only 21, you probably have about another 60 years to finish your degree, what's the rush?

Look after number 1..... and 2:)

mickyt

Have to agree with your BF and other posters. try have a chat with the head your college department, they will be more then happy to accomodate you any way they can.

Best thing to do is have a chat with your heads in college and see what can be done for you.

I will also add that, you worked hard to get your savings up for the summer last summer and may of worked in the past.

Don't be afraid to see what monies your entitled to, you contributed to tax etc.

This is why, so that you can get something out of it when you need it.

Congrats on the baby... and may I suggest the name Michael if its a boy lol

good luck

Dave!

Quitting college "just because you're pregnant" is a perfectly valid reason and nobody should hold that against you. It would be completely understandable for you to leave college completely and enter the workforce (if possible) to help with the finances.

But you want to stay with college in spite of the impeding arrival, which is great!

I would say have a talk with some authority in college and get yourself out of the course for the time being. You may have to pay fees when you do decide to go back, but there's no point in putting yourself through this when you have a baby to worry about. Just concentrate on keeping your body and mind in good shape so that everything goes to plan with the babog.

If/when you feel up to it in the future, you can return to college and finish your qualification.

There's no rush, you're only 21

nomorebadtown

Unregistered wrote: »

My boyfriend keeps telling me to leave and go back next year but i feel really bad i dont want people to think im just quitting because im pregnant . Yet i dont want to struggle and be miserble all year only to have to go back again next year because ive failed.

So should i quit ? or suck it up and stick it out?

Also i dont plan on going on welfare or anything i have a lot of money saved (from working last summer) to tide me over till next year and my BF is in a very well paid job
I would appreciate any advice especially if anyone has been in my situation before

wtf!?

People defer a year or take a year out all the time and just because the mood takes them, and why not! NOBODY would think any worse of you for taking a year out to have a baby!!! Seriously, this should not even be coming into your head. Firstly, its no ones business but you own and secondly nobody worth worrying about would condem you for putting the health of youself and your baby before your college career (which you can complete at a later date anyway). congrats and good luck:)

justsomebloke

OP when is your due date and when are you summer exams this year as chances are that even if you did stay you might not be able to complete the year anyway. That said I would try and cover as much of the course as possible this year as things will be tough with a new born next year with you in college and your boyfriend working

Wagon

Your pregnant, that's hard enough as it is without college on top of it. Also health issues and the like are very very good reason for dropping out. Go back when your up to it but put the health of you and your child first.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replies
Im due at the end of May and my exams are usually around the 10th-20th so i know it would be cutting it fine.
I have a major project due at the end of the year and ill have to redo the entire year if i dont hand it up as its scientific based (if you get what i mean)

I dont want people to think im lazy because if i leave college the chances are i wont be doing much till the baby is here and i dont know if i could stand that either i hate being bored! I also really want too finish my degree as i know the higher up i am education wise the easier it is to get a better job

I have yet to tell my course director (and anyone else) im pregnant id like to wait till after the 12 weeks and my next doc app- when i get to hear the heart beat

Lollipops23

You are nearly 3 months pregnant so when it comes time to do your finals you're gonna be nearly full-term!!!dude,people find them horrendous enough,do you have any idea how horribly uncomfortable you're gonna be??!!i think you need to take the pressure off yourself and defer till next year!

PS congratulations!!xxx

Dave!

Unregistered wrote: »

Thanks for the replies
Im due at the end of May and my exams are usually around the 10th-20th so i know it would be cutting it fine.
I have a major project due at the end of the year and ill have to redo the entire year if i dont hand it up as its scientific based (if you get what i mean)

I dont want people to think im lazy because if i leave college the chances are i wont be doing much till the baby is here and i dont know if i could stand that either i hate being bored! I also really want too finish my degree as i know the higher up i am education wise the easier it is to get a better job

I have yet to tell my course director (and anyone else) im pregnant id like to wait till after the 12 weeks and my next doc app- when i get to hear the heart beat

Bloody hell, who cares if we think you're lazy?!

Maybe because you have yet to hear the heartbeat, the enormity of the situation has not hit you quite yet... It's quite alright (indeed encouraged) for you to relax, do nothing, rest up, be lazy, etc., between now and the time that baba makes its way into the world! Get that into your head!

Wise choice to want to finish the course, but don't overexert yourself. I'm barely gonna get through 3rd year at this rate -- and I'm not carrying a child inside me! (that I'm aware... can guys get preggers?:o)

If you're concerned, then what you could do is talk to the course director and make sure it's okay to leave and start the year again, and if it is, talk to your various lecturers and establish what work you will have to do next year, and then do it as you feel up to it. ie. if you'll have stuff to read, get a hold of it all and as you feel up to it, pick up a book!

Congrats by the way!

Therickmachine

No one would blame you for deferring a year. However talk to the college about the possibility of continuing where you left off next year.

A friend of mine got as far as march on her post grad last year when her dad died. The uni said it was ok to resume next year in march as she had all the work done up to then there was no need to start again.:)

If you can that might be a good idea. Carry on as long as you can (only if you are able) To have a chunk of the year out of the way to leave you plenty of time to go back next year. It would be nice knowing you had only the last few months to worry bout next year rather than a whole year again.