I want my hobby back

LegacyUser

I'm obsessed with model trains. It's a great hobby. I am happiest when I am immersed in model building, planning, researching railway history, or sometimes simply just watching the trains go round.

Unfortunately it seems in this world there's no room for hobbies any more. I have to be realistic, and work, and earn money, and have a life outside of the hobby. And I have, and I am sociable, with many friends who have nothing to do with model trains, and I can do most things.

The problem is, it seems I have less and less time for my hobby. It's more than a hobby. It's what I love. For me, it just happens to be model trains, but it could just as easily be stamp collecting, wood carving, flower arranging, any one of a thousand fascinating and obscure interests. Some people just don't 'get' the hobby thing. They live to work, and spend their few bob in the pub. That's their thing, and good luck to them.

All I want in life is a small, simple home, a small income, and a simple life, and my railways, but I seem to be enslaved to pay for a hefty mortgage all on my own, esb, phone, insurance, car, bank loans, pension, dozens of bills, not to mention eating and dressing. I need so much money every month, that I have to work the whole round of the week to cover it all. The result being, there's no time left for hobbies, and if there was, I'd be too tired.

I have a few friends in the hobby who are lucky, they come from large homes in the middle class belt, and family money behind them, so they can relax a bit and enjoy the hobby. I have no money behind me. Everything I have, I worked for from scratch. I don't mind working hard, but if I have to spend the next twenty or thirty years working at that rate, simply to survive, it just doesn't seem fair. What's the point of life if it is a round of slavery?

If I have to wait till I'm 65 to retire and have a hobby, I shall consider it a wasted life. I want to get off this treadmill and enjoy my life. How do other people manage to juggle life and enjoyment when there are so many financial pressures, that never recede, only get worse and worse every year? I can't not pay the mortgage, I have to live somewhere. It just seems a wrong way to live.

I have no partner to help. I don't mind that. I'd give up a partner, a home, work, everything, to have my hobby. That's just who I am. But financially I am tied fast to this juggernaut lifestyle, and there seems to be no 'opt out' option. I don't want much. I don't need much. I just want more freedom. I cannot survive on a 40 hour a week job though. I'd be out on the street within a month. And that's certainly no good!

JonathanAnon

Well I'm not qualified to diagnose anything, but person to person it's sounds like you have some sort of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Most people have hobbies.... golf, soccer, playstation, maintaining their own website etc etc. but as a form of relaxation, it doesnt consume their life.

Maybe the best option would be to get a job that has something to do with trains. The main thing about your job is that you have to have an interest in what you are doing. If you dont have an interest in your job then it is time to look elsewhere.

RoosterIllusion

Yes, it sounds like you are obsessing about it.

My hobbies are playing the guitar, riding yore ma and painting toy soldiers.

Variety is the spice of life, a mix of things allows you to enjoy your hobbies more I find. I used to be obsessive about playing computer games and I found myself playing them but gaining no enjoyment from it. So as soon as I stopped playing them bar a three hour session with my brother once a month I found myself much happier and much more enjoyable to play them.

tommmy1979

This is perfectly normal, more people should think this way!!! More play time and less work time.. ze french and ze spanish are experts at this.
I'm not sure of a quick solution for you OP but... thinking outside of the box.. could you turn your hobby into a business?

metrovelvet

You need to find a way to make a living out of your hobby.

I'm not familiar with model trains, but I do like wrestling figures.

Some guys on forums i visit will buy a WWE (The most popular wrestling promotion in the world) wrestling figure, re-mould the body, re-paint it and make it into a popular wrestler who doesn't work for WWE, or who will likely never get a figure, and they put it on eBay where wrestling figure collectors will bid on it.


Could this be applied to your hobby? Is there a certain style of train, track, pedetian, building, mountain, etc. that you can't get at a retail store? Could YOU make it and flog it on eBay where like-minded people would actually want it?

Can you buy a cheap ass trainstation and learn how to rig it up with working LED lights so it becomes a fully functional train station? would other collectors want that?

What about buying a bland train, and getting some paintbrushes out and re-painting it to make a train that just looks pretty cool?


I realise that the kind of thing i'm mentioning would require you to mess about with LED displays and you'd have to destroy a few trains in order to become good at repainting them, but its a source of income (if it would be at all popular, that is) and its related to your hobby.


(as i say, i don't know much/anything about model trains, so the above might be completely useless, but i just thought i'd throw it out there anyway).

Victor

Cop on guys.

JonathanAnon wrote: »

Well I'm not qualified to diagnose anything, but person to person it's sounds like you have some sort of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

Exactly you're not qualified to diagnose anything, so don't.

brendansmith

Nothing wrong with a hobby.
You have to get enjoyment outta life and work-eat-sleep-repeat-die isnt gonna cut it.

MCMLXXXIII

<<I think it goes something like this>>

A very successful businessman was on vacation in a small town in Guatamala. He saw a fisherman coming in with his catch and started a conversation. "What do you do with these fish?" he asked. The fisherman told the businessman that he ate what he needed and sold the rest. The businessman asked "Well what do you do with the rest of your time?"

The fisherman explained that he wakes up with the sun, and then goes and catches some fish. He brings the fish home to eat and whatever is left over he took down to the market and sold them to the other people of the village. Then he would go home where his wife would have dinner ready to eat and they would enjoy it. Then him and his wife would take a nice siesta. When they woke, he would go back to town and have a few drinks and spend time with friends.

The businessman told the fisherman "I have an MBA from Harvard and I will help you create a very successful enterprise!" He went on "At first, you will need to spend some more time catching more fish - that way you can make more money at the market. Then you can start paying someone to sell your fish for you as you stay and catch even more. As soon as you have more money you can buy another boat and pay more people to catch more fish on your behalf!" The fisherman asks "Then what?" The businessman tells him that he "can grow a large fleet for people to fish for him and he could get an office and supervise everyone from the mainland. The fisherman could even start exporting fish to other places to boost sales!" With this plan, the fisherman would have millions within a few years. The fisherman asked once again "And then what?"

The businessman grinned and told the fisherman that he "could happily retire, wake up when he wanted, fish a little, eat and sleep with his wife, and go into town to drink and have fun with his friends in the evenings."


I think the point is: have fun with your trains. It's what you enjoy, and it keeps you from either being a robot at work, or forcing fake social interaction at the local when you just want to be at home with your trains. Keep your friends, but there are other people out there that also like trains...make friends with them too.

DublinWriter

trainmad wrote: »

I have no partner to help. I don't mind that. I'd give up a partner, a home, work, everything, to have my hobby. That's just who I am. But financially I am tied fast to this juggernaut lifestyle

Juggernaut lifestyle?!? Besides utility bills, what other major expenses do you have that require you to work so hard?

Although your hobby might appear weird to some, I can emphasise with you; whatever makes you happy and isn't hurting anyone else is fine.

You could combine work and pleasure and open a model shop. I know there are several around Dublin City Centre and they all do a roaring trade.

After all, if you work at something you love, then you'll never work a day in your life.

LegacyUser

Where do you live?

If your hobby means so much to you, and you don't have enough money to pursue it now and you see it was one of the most important things in your life, then why not move to somewhere where you can more easily pay your mortgage and have more money?

There are houses for sale in the West of Ireland for €100k - which works out at about €400 - €450 per month in mortgage repayments.

Life is about priorities.

Some people want a big car, big house and to do that they need a big job and work long hours. Good for them.

I like the simple life. I work for myself, live a simple life, don't work too hard and have a hobby which while not as all consuming as yours, is still a big part of my life. It makes me feel alive and it is encouraging me to work harder so I can afford to do it more often.

If you don't like your life the way it is then change it.

TripleAce

JonathanAnon wrote: »

Well I'm not qualified to diagnose anything, but person to person it's sounds like you have some sort of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

ffs can he not do whatever he wants in his free time? If he wants to dedicate 12 hours/day to the train models because this is what he likes to do, why can he not to so?

OP, surely even if you work 10 hours/day you should still have enough time for your hobby? Is this hobby so expensive (sorry I am not an expert)?

Blitzkrieger

TTD ftw...

Wibbs

Blitzkrieger, helpful more expansive posts in future please.

LegacyUser

Eh welcome to life!

Honestly, it sucks I know, do you think everybody else would not love to stay home all day and do what they love or whatever hobbies they have?


Look I know it sounds harsh but life simply does not work that way. We have to do things we dislike doing. The faster you realise that and man up about it the easier it will be and the quicker you will be able to get on with things and make a healthy balance between work and your hobby.

by8auj6csd3ioq

RoosterIllusion wrote: »

.Variety is the spice of life,.

What is the spice of variety? Seriously OP you say you have a big mortgage, why not just rent if you only want a small house and your trains

Beau x1

BilldaMill wrote: »

Eh welcome to life!

Honestly, it sucks I know, do you think everybody else would not love to stay home all day and do what they love or whatever hobbies they have?


Look I know it sounds harsh but life simply does not work that way. We have to do things we dislike doing. The faster you realise that and man up about it the easier it will be and the quicker you will be able to get on with things and make a healthy balance between work and your hobby.

Maybe a bit harsh, but it's true. I think the OP has a case of the blues, that's all. Make sure to put yourself first over this weekend if you can to relax and enjoy your hobbies. Unfortunately, nobody can do that for you but yourself, you see?

Life will be what you make of it. On top of the dull side most people like yourself have to endure such as bills, mortgages and a typical 9-5 job; people still make time for their hobbies and so should you. If it's a lack of free time, like others have said - skip the forced interaction if you feel so inclined and do what you want to do.

I have plenty of friends who don't attend social events because of sailing/football/etc..so it's fine!