Things on a downward slope with girlfriend

vorbis

I posted a while back about how I had a big fight with my girlfriend two months over her wanting to move in with me and me deciding to move in with friends instead. I felt it was too soon. We've been going out for a year and a half.

Things have been rocky since. She has felt that I don't love her because of not wanting to move in with her. I have tried to tell her thats not true but she seems to keep thinking like that. She's also saying stuff like maybe it'd be better off if we were just friends.

Despite all this kind of talk she hasn't broken up with me and I amn't 100% that I want to break up with her either. Its like things are bad but they aren't bad enough to break up if that makes any sense. The main problem is that we'll go say a week without arguing and everything would be fine. Then we end up talking about the whole moving in thing again and it just turns into an argument. Its pretty draining tbh.

The latest incident has got me a little peturbed. I'm not jealous of her going out with male friends. I do trust her in that sense. However she texted me last night to say that she was going clubbing with her male roommate. Its a bit odd since she hardly sees the guy when in the house and its I think the first time they've done anything together in 6 months of living together.

What bothers me is that if I told her that I was going clubbing with a girl I only kind of knew from work, she would go mad about it. It honestly feels like gameplaying that here she is doing something she herself would get pissed about.

I'm wondering if there is a way to rescue the relationship. Things just aren't returning to normal. She hasn't stayed over at my new place in 2 months due to being upset about moving in. I'd see a future for us if things were back to normal. The current situation though can't last though.

MagicMarker

She sounds like a complete head wrecker, i don't think i could put up with it if i were in your position.

jaybo1

What do you want? Do you love her?

It sounds like you are both playing games.

eddie.fandango

Hi OP.

It's funny you should mention that your problems with your GF started about a year and a half in. How many of us have been with that 'perfect' person, and after a year or so things go south. TBH, you're GF's behavior in relation to you guys moving in together seems pretty unacceptable: you've made your position clear on the matter, and she refuses to accept that.

It's also clear from your post that you are unhappy in the relationship, but not unhappy enough to break up....again, sound familiar anyone? At this point, i'd recommend putting her aside for a moment and being 'selfish':

'what am I getting out of this relationship?',
'How is this enriching my life?',
'What are the pros/cons of breaking up for ME?'

These are the questions you need to ask yourself, and you WILL figure it out in the end, trust me. Best of luck man.

Piste

I'd say if anything was going on between your girlfriend and her roommate she wouldn't tell you she was going out clubbing with him but instead say she was with female friends. So yeah she's possibly just trying to make you jealous.

She Devil

Definately trying to make you jealous, and trying to get inside your head to make you think that, so as you may feel uncomfortable with her sharing a house with this guy, and hey presto you ask her to move in!