Unprotected anal sex..scared.

LegacyUser

Ive crossed a big line tonight. I think I'm addicted to sex. Just split up with my gf purely cos I wanted more sex with other women. Got sex at hte weekend but was horny tonight in a chat room got talking to a transvestite. Met him and had unprotected anal and oral. Came on his stomach. I know I am going to hell. I am not gay. I love women. But now I am really scared I may have picked up something. Was wondering what the chances of infection were. There was lots of lubrication used. I didnt notice any discomfort. He told me that he was tested 3 weeks ago and was clean, and hadnt had sex for a year. But I would be stupid to believe him I suppose.. Really scared what should I do.

dudara

Whether you are gay or not, or somewhere in between doesn't matter. Whether you think that you have sinned or not doesn't matter.

Get yourself to a GP, or sexual health clinic and get checked out. This is what you should do anytime that you have unprotected sex with any partner.

The STI sticky at the top of this forum should help you out.

AngryBadger

OP I realise this isn'#t really the issue, and pardon the lecturing tone, but just because the guy was homosexual doesn't menas he automatically had an std. Jeebus.

As Dudara said get yourself checked out just to get the all clear....but seriously....open the mind man.

seanybiker

if he didnt have any in a year why did he get checked 3 weeks ago. Just get yourself checked out and be safe in the future

tbh

you really need to think why you made the judgement that it would be ok to have unprotected anal sex with someone you met off the internet. In the cold light of day, I'm sure you can see how dangerous that is. In the future, you should avoid putting yourself in this situation - on that scale, it's easier to not turn on the computer than it is to say "I can't do this, I don't have condoms" when someone has your hard penis in their mouth, you know? Get yourself tested, to put your mind at rest. But dude, you really need to get your compulsion under control.

TheBigFella

veryscared00 wrote: »

I am not gay

Hmmmmm.........

Wibbs

TheBigFella stay on topic. Hmmm is hardly an answer to the OP's question

Oryx

veryscared00 wrote: »

Ive crossed a big line tonight. I think I'm addicted to sex. Just split up with my gf purely cos I wanted more sex with other women. Got sex at hte weekend but was horny tonight in a chat room got talking to a transvestite. Met him and had unprotected anal and oral. Came on his stomach. I know I am going to hell. I am not gay. I love women. But now I am really scared I may have picked up something. Was wondering what the chances of infection were. There was lots of lubrication used. I didnt notice any discomfort. He told me that he was tested 3 weeks ago and was clean, and hadnt had sex for a year. But I would be stupid to believe him I suppose.. Really scared what should I do.

Deal with the most pressing worry first. Go get checked for STIs and at least have that much sorted out. Protecting yourself and those you sleep with is an issue whether they are male, female, straight or gay. I hope that if you had had unprotected sex with a woman you would realise it is equally stupid, and require the same protection.

Beyond that you do have bigger issues to deal with. If you dont get your head around why you cannot control your need for sex, you will inevitably end up in a similar situation again, perhaps not with a transvestite, but with someone.

This is an addiction, and you may need outside help in dealing with it. Youve already said that youve made destructive changes to your life to allow you to accommodate your needs more. Just because its sex and not say, alcohol, does not make it something innocuous and harmless. It is harming you.

And about you going to hell. I dont know your religious outlook, but I would say dont add an extra layer of guilt and worry to yourself that you dont need. Hell is a state of mind really, its where you are at now. Just deal with what you must now and worry about your immortal soul another day.

Ann22

AngryBadger wrote: »

OP I realise this isn'#t really the issue, and pardon the lecturing tone, but just because the guy was homosexual doesn't menas he automatically had an std. Jeebus.

As Dudara said get yourself checked out just to get the all clear....but seriously....open the mind man.

I don't think he's assuming just because the guy was gay that he automatically had an infection but the fact that the hiv virus is picked up much easier through unprotected anal sex is a cause for worry. However it was on the Northern Ireland news the other day that the cases have risen even in the heterosexual community recently up there and that there's a new saliva test you can have done and results received in 20mins. More than likely you're ok but to put your mind at rest it may be worth checking out if you could have that done. You might have to wait a few weeks though to be sure you're clear. Best of luck.

Bottle_of_Smoke

AngryBadger wrote: »

OP I realise this isn'#t really the issue, and pardon the lecturing tone, but just because the guy was homosexual doesn't menas he automatically had an std. Jeebus.

As Dudara said get yourself checked out just to get the all clear....but seriously....open the mind man.

No, but if he's the type of person who meets up with someone off the internet he's known a few hours & then has unprotected anal sex with them I'd be pretty concerned.

davyjose

Was the girl you had sex with at the weekend tested 3 weeks ago? Had she not had sex for a year?

somethingwitty

AngryBadger wrote: »

OP I realise this isn'#t really the issue, and pardon the lecturing tone, but just because the guy was homosexual doesn't menas he automatically had an std. Jeebes

No but it is more likely as the main reason people use contraception is to protect against pregnancy (i know its wrong but its very true) and it is more likely that someone not completly straight or whatever will have something. I can , in a way, understand why the poster is more concerned.

Ann22

davyjose wrote: »

Was the girl you had sex with at the weekend tested 3 weeks ago? Had she not had sex for a year?

Having unprotected sex with someone whose history you don't know is dodgy in this day and age but the rectum is warmer than the vagina and is not built for sex so it bleeds more easily. It's a perfect breeding ground for Hiv. That's why aids was so prevelant in the gay community before it started to spread. It's playing russian roulette with your life.

HouseHippo

First Off don't ever think you are going to hell for sleeping with a man. There is nothing wrong with that! It was the way God made you and it's perfectly natural to experiment. You could be bi sexual.

Second of all. Unportected sex. You Fool! But there is no going back now so get yourself off to the STD clinic quick smart. It is also very bigotted for you to think he had an STD because he was gay (althogh he does meet up with people for sex in chatrooms) some of my best friends are gay men and have had less std's than some females I know

colly10

HouseHippo wrote: »

It is also very bigotted for you to think he had an STD because he was gay

The OP never said that he may have caught an STD because the guy, just that he's worried that he caught something - probably cause its a random bloke of the web that he met in a chat room and rode the same day. If I was him id be worried too

Varkov

Gay people are generally riddled with diseases. Stay away.

dudara

Varkov banned for one week.

dudara

jaffa20

Varkov wrote: »

Gay people are generally riddled with diseases. Stay away.

I was waiting for this. What a sad insult to hear :mad:

HouseHippo

colly10 wrote: »

The OP never said that he may have caught an STD because the guy, just that he's worried that he caught something - probably cause its a random bloke of the web that he met in a chat room and rode the same day. If I was him id be worried too

You refrained to read the rest of that sentance evidently

HouseHippo

Varkov wrote: »

Gay people are generally riddled with diseases. Stay away.

Boooooooooo urns

dudara

HouseHippo and jaffa20

Please don't feed the troll. There is no need to comment on a post for which the user has been banned. Stick to the topic at hand.

dudara

[Jackass]

A tranny? Really? I dunno man, that's a pretty major step for just having a horn on you.

I'm not being smart, but next time, give it a tug fella.

As for STI's, there's no point worrying about it as there's nothing you can do. The chances are you're ok, but get checked just in case.

If nothing was "internal" to you I would say the chances are close to zero, it's very difficult for men to pick up anything serious such as the aids, although possible, if there was something "internal" to you, then there's a chance so get it checked.

Dude....a tranny?? Don't worry about gay and don't worry about "going to hell", whatever man, I'm liberal and all and I think people should be able to do whatever they want with whoever they want as long as everybody is happy, but out of pure randyness, this is a massive step to take outside your comfort zone and you need a girlfriend or a fu*king psychologist. (no offence)

dudara

[Jackass] Stick to helpful advice please. There's no need for your comments on transexuals.

dudara

Pakage of King

On the one hand i would like to commend you on your work ! High 5

But seriously unprotected sex is dangerous with anyone whom your not in a relationship with (Sexual orientation is not important). You should get yourself checked out in one of the STD clinics.

Beruthiel

Pakage,
Read the forum Charter.
B

LegacyUser

I'll start with a very short lecture:

Never, Ever, Ever have unprotected sex of any kind with a person whose HIV status is not known to you beyond doubt. As described by someone else here, it is the same as playing Russian Roulette for each incidence of exposure.

I only want to advise you on HIV - as far as I am concerned other STDs such as gonorrhea etc... are easily treated. So in that regard, I highly recommend a full panel STD check up in a clinic (see sticky at top) 2 to 3 weeks post exposure.

Now I've seen some very wishy washy comments on this thread from people who are either anti homosexual, who are the PC police and whom are just down right ignorant to STDs including HIV.

As a man who has sex with other men (you & your sex partner) you are at a higher risk for HIV than any other subgroup of society. that is not an anti-homosexual things, thats just reality I am afraid and it boils down primarily to the anatomy of the human body.

The estimated risk of HIV transmission through unprotected rectal intercourse with a HIV positive person is 1 per 100 instances. In that case you have an approximate 1% chance of HIV infection. Now, while the odds are firmly stacked on your side you must be aware that HIV transmission can and does occur through a one time exposure. You are at risk and indeed you would be classified in the high medium risk category. Why High medium and not high??? well thats becoz ur partner in this instance has not been verified as being HIV positive. Also, when asked directly about their status face to face most people tell the truth. This is not a foolproof method of protection of course but should be one of the preventative measures taken when have intercourse with a new partner. The most important and essential preventative measure is the use of a latex condom.

It can take up to 3 months for HIV antibodies to appear in the human bodies. Once antibodies are present this is know as seroconversion. On average it takes 22 days to seroconvert. However, a conclusive negative HIV test cannot be obtained unitl 12-13 weeks post exposure. Generally, this is considered conservative when using modern day testing but this is the medical recommended timeframe as per world health organisation, CDC and Irish Health System guidelines. At 6 weeks post exposure 95% of those who are positive will have a positive test result. at 8 weeks this figure increases to 98-99% and at 12 weeks this is 99.99%. I recommend an 8 week test (if negative I'd bet my salary that you will be fine for your 12 week test) but you should follow up with a 12/13 week conclusive test.

If the incident occurred in the past 72 hours I urge you to attend St. James hospital or another HIV specialist centre with a view to PEP - this is a dose of HIV suppressant drugs (anti retrovirals) which are highly effective at killing the virus before it takes hold of your body. However, after 72 hours PEP is practically useless. I am confident that according to your risk a HIV specialist would recommend a 28 day PEP course.

Finally, stay away from the internet. Do not research HIV and its initial infection systems known as ARS as this will seriously fuel your anxiety over the matter and I can guarantee you that every symptom you read you will have. Symptoms are a futile way of diagnosing HIV as all the symptoms are more commonly associated with other viruses/illnesses and are very common. Also, a high number of people infected with HIV never experience any symptoms at the point of initial infection.

Finally, I wish to re-iterate the point that you should never indulge in sexual activity without protection again. If you are lucky to escape the bullet this time, it will only be a matter of time before you become infected if you carry on such activity. Latex Condoms are relatively cheap and when used correctly and consistently and where no breakage occurs offers 100% protection against HIV. HIV cannot permeate intact latex.

My apologies for the long thread but it is highly important and will save your life and others who come in contact with you.

IF you are HIV positive, you can still maintain a reasonably normal life if you get specialist intervention at an early stage. A high percentage of people can now live an almost full life span with HIV, although this should not be construed as a green light to behave irresponsibly. Livin with HIV can be very difficult and HIV driugs are not always guaranteed to work effectively for everyone and indeed the HIV virus can evolve to make your HIV drug regime to be ineffective. Believe me you do not want that hanging over you for your life. Please look after yourself.

slumped

HIVKnowledgable wrote: »

I'll start with a very short lecture:

BEST reply to a thread in a long time...maybe even ever.

S