What to tell ex?

LolaDub

I posted this under anon but it never showed so i'll give it another go! In short i broke up with a boyfriend a few years ago after he told me he'd walked into his sisters room and saw her masturbating. He stayed and watched and really enjoyed it. He didn't see anything wrong at all but it really freaked me out and i found i just couldn't look him or his sister in the eye anymore. Now he's gotten back in contact asking why we broke up as he still thinks about me and i don't know what to tell him? Any ideas? Thanks! I know its not a huge problem but something i really have no idea what to do about

Eeewwww Where do you find em Lola!
I'd stay out of touch with that one.

BaZmO*

Tell him he's a freak

lolly22

LolaDub wrote: »

I posted this under anon but it never showed so i'll give it another go! In short i broke up with a boyfriend a few years ago after he told me he'd walked into his sisters room and saw her masturbating. He stayed and watched and really enjoyed it. He didn't see anything wrong at all but it really freaked me out and i found i just couldn't look him or his sister in the eye anymore. Now he's gotten back in contact asking why we broke up as he still thinks about me and i don't know what to tell him? Any ideas? Thanks! I know its not a huge problem but something i really have no idea what to do about

:eek: somethings not right with him! Just cut all contacts with him.;)

kayos

:eek: that is one brother and sister relationship thats a bit too close!

Kinda reminds me of the episode of American dad and the picture of Haley.....*shudder*

Raytown Rocks

LolaDub wrote: »

i broke up with a boyfriend a few years ago after he told me he'd walked into his sisters room and saw her masturbating. He stayed and watched and really enjoyed it.

I think your answer is in your quote to be honest.....

jim o doom

LolaDub wrote: »

I posted this under anon but it never showed so i'll give it another go! In short i broke up with a boyfriend a few years ago after he told me he'd walked into his sisters room and saw her masturbating. He stayed and watched and really enjoyed it. He didn't see anything wrong at all but it really freaked me out and i found i just couldn't look him or his sister in the eye anymore. Now he's gotten back in contact asking why we broke up as he still thinks about me and i don't know what to tell him? Any ideas? Thanks! I know its not a huge problem but something i really have no idea what to do about

Yeah I'd be inclined to agree with the other posters and go with the whole - stay away; if you are confident enough tell him exactly why, and then tell him you are not interested in staying in contact.
That or just blow him off with some vague "it just wasn't working out".
I have a sister and that post disturbed me, had I walked in on such a scene I might have thrown myself from a precipice, as I am sure my sister would do in the reverse situation !

LolaDub

Moonbaby wrote: »

Eeewwww Where do you find em Lola!
I'd stay out of touch with that one.

I know i ask myself this every flipping day!

The sister didn't know he was watching or reinacting it every time he went to the bathroom! Thanks for assuring me that it wasn't me who was crazy here. He was an alright guy otherwise but when he said that i just felt sick. Anyhow i don't know if i should be honest with him or say it just wasn't working out etc?

JaneyMc

Cut all contact, and if he persists, tell him exactly why.

beth-lou

I'd just stay away. That is creepy. The fact that the sister didn't know he was spying on is almost worse. Stay the hell away.

Aurora Borealis

Why not just tell him what you told us. Might nip it in the bud so to speak.

A.B.

P.S. Was it a once off and was his sister aware of it?

lolly22

I wouldnt even waste my time explaining why.

LolaDub

Cheers lads!

No his sister didn't know anything about it.

When i said to him i thought it was sick he said that any woman masturbating would turn him on and his sister was female so why wouldn't he.

I was a bit afraid writing this that you would all reply saying you didn't know why i found it horrible!

I think i will just say it wasn't working out and if he insists i'll let him know.

Gone West

Theres a poster on boards (wincest something) who can probably give you advice on this, as AFAIK he/she has personal experience of this type of thing, or so I believe.

Perhaps that sort of insight would be useful for closure or whatever?

Still, pretty weird all the same. Good job getting out of there.

beth-lou

What I really find hard to understand is why he told you about it?

Irishcrx

Something major wrong there, If I caught my sister doing that i'd run a mile and have a cold shower, stay away you don't owe him an explanation.

LolaDub

I don't want to understand it at all it freaks me out. I don't know why he told me beth-lou he talked about sex and fantasies a lot so it might have creeped into conversation then, i'm not sure. Actually i might just give him the link to this thread as the reason. I don't really want to make him feel bad or anything but he is the one who has come looking for a reason

lolly22

LolaDub wrote: »

I don't want to understand it at all it freaks me out.

Walk away Lola, he doesnt need an explenation and he needs his head sorted if he cant see for himself whats wrong with what he said.

rohe

did this guy seriously expect ye to live happily ever after after telling you that????

he's just sick, i have to agree with the other posters he doesn't deserve an explaination

Aurora Borealis

Of course nobody really owes anybody anything but why not tell the guy so he can deal with it or whatever issues there are surrounding it.

LolaDub

I just texted him to tell him. Will let you know what he says!

COH

Tell his sister, and all his friends, and all your friends... then sit back and have a chuckle

Aurora Borealis

LolaDub wrote: »

I just texted him to tell him. Will let you know what he says!

Fair play to ya I say. Honesty is best policy and the only way people learn if they are to learn at all.

LolaDub

I feel a bit bad telling him by text but it was texts he used to ask me! Thanks for the support!

Wibbs

COH posts a little more constructive in future please. Read the charter.

milod

Irishcrx wrote: »

Something major wrong there, If I caught my sister doing that i'd run a mile and have a cold shower, stay away you don't owe him an explanation.

Hmmm, would you really need a cold shower?! :eek:

OP, if this chap persists, simply tell him to see a Counsellor or Psychotherapist experienced in sexual matters. He needs to know that if he can't see the problem, a professional needs to explain the boundaries to him...

carlybabe1

I agree with the other posters here op, it would be one thing if it was a house mate, but HIS SISTER, whats really scary is that he has to ask you why...I'd be freaked wonderin what he was thinkin about every time he looked at her. God love her though, I dont think you ought to tell her as one poster suggested, you'd ruin the poor girl....does he not know boundaries ffs :eek:

Rayven199

Yeah why did he tell you about it!! Gross!!

Thats a deal breaker right there. Creepy

Id tell him over text and be done with it. Dont know how he cant see that that is just wrong

citeal

I feel sick. what a creep.

Holy god what a sick f**k ....
I guess some people can be a lot more messed up than you could ever realise

What set total alarm bells off for me was that he told you and you were his girlfriend at the time like he was sharing a hot fantasy (OMFG so wrong on many diff levels)
Its like he thinks nothing of doing this

LolaLuv

It is really, really weird that he told you about it, but thank god he did or else there's no telling how much time you would have wasted on that perv! Eew, I really feel for you that is just revolting!!

kraggy

LolaDub wrote: »

I posted this under anon but it never showed so i'll give it another go! In short i broke up with a boyfriend a few years ago after he told me he'd walked into his sisters room and saw her masturbating. He stayed and watched and really enjoyed it. He didn't see anything wrong at all but it really freaked me out and i found i just couldn't look him or his sister in the eye anymore. Now he's gotten back in contact asking why we broke up as he still thinks about me and i don't know what to tell him? Any ideas? Thanks! I know its not a huge problem but something i really have no idea what to do about

Easy.

Tell him you're just not interested anymore. You've moved on.

LolaDub

Well update is i got a response saying he can't believe that i'm so shallow that i'd dump someone over their sexual preferences. Just because i was a prude and wouldn't engage myself enough to satisfy my boyfriend while he sacrificed his pleasure and accepted this means he should dump me not me dump him.....


:rolleyes:

Sorry but lol at muppet ex.

Silverfish

LolaDub wrote: »

Well update is i got a response saying he can't believe that i'm so shallow that i'd dump someone over their sexual preferences. Just because i was a prude and wouldn't engage myself enough to satisfy my boyfriend while he sacrificed his pleasure and accepted this means he should dump me not me dump him.....


:rolleyes:

Well, then he should be happy its over, and leave you alone.

Astounding stuff.

LolaDub

I am so so so happy you guys agree with me. I was posting as anom because i was worried you'd all say what thats normal why did you split with him lol! That and 6 other people use my pc!

so ladies he's fully on the market- he also describes himself as a sex addict because he thinks he sounds like more of a stud this way. He has a really thin penis and doesn't have a clue where it all goes-ENJOY!!!!!!!

EEwww I didn't need to know that penii came in a thin variety. :eek:

LolaDub

Moonbaby wrote: »

EEwww I didn't need to know that penii came in a thin variety. :eek:

LOL yes you did!!! Ugh he's always been one of the past stories i felt sick about never could laugh at him you know. Thanks everyone!