Don't know whether to have sex with my GF ????

LegacyUser

Ok I've been going out with my girlfriend for the last month now and we both really want to have sex (not that we've actually said it but we know we both want eachother in that sense so there's no issue there) the thing is she's from Australia and will be going back home within the next year so I'm kind of afraid to do it with her incase she gets pregnant or something because her not being from here would really make it complicated with regards to what would happen if anything like that was to happen so I really don't know what to do for the best.
I just have all these things running through my mind,loads of what if this happens or this or that and this etc etc....sorry about this I just need to vent it .

gogglebok

The 1 OP wrote: »

Ok I've been going out with my girlfriend for the last month now and we both really want to have sex (not that we've actually said it but we know we both want eachother in that sense so there's no issue there) the thing is she's from Australia and will be going back home within the next year so I'm kind of afraid to do it with her incase she gets pregnant or something because her not being from here would really make it complicated with regards to what would happen if anything like that was to happen so I really don't know what to do for the best.
I just have all these things running through my mind,loads of what if this happens or this or that and this etc etc....sorry about this I just need to vent it .

If it's something you both want to do, and you're both over-age, what's to stop you? Fear of pregnancy shouldn't be a factor if you're using proper contraception. Is there something else you're worried about?

Regardless of what you're feeling, you should talk to her about it. That's where intimacy comes from, and intimacy makes everything much more fun.

Good luck.

AngryBadger

gogglebok wrote: »

If it's something you both want to do, and you're both over-age, what's to stop you? Fear of pregnancy shouldn't be a factor if you're using proper contraception. Is there something else you're worried about?

Regardless of what you're feeling, you should talk to her about it. That's where intimacy comes from, and intimacy makes everything much more fun.

Good luck.

+1 OP, can't argue with good advice

Fat Pie Lot

gogglebok wrote: »

If it's something you both want to do, and you're both over-age, what's to stop you? Fear of pregnancy shouldn't be a factor if you're using proper contraception. Is there something else you're worried about?

Regardless of what you're feeling, you should talk to her about it. That's where intimacy comes from, and intimacy makes everything much more fun.

Good luck.

+1 from here, too.

LegacyUser

gogglebok wrote: »

If it's something you both want to do, and you're both over-age, what's to stop you? Fear of pregnancy shouldn't be a factor if you're using proper contraception. Is there something else you're worried about?

No there's nothing else worrying me other than what will happen if she does so how get pregnant she can't stay here if she does and I can't move to where she live so this is what's worrying me because I will want to be with and look after my baby if she was to,this is what's worrying me that I won't be able to,not saying I'm in any position to have a child because I'm not but if it was to happen I'd want to do everything I can for her and my baby.
Of course I'll use a condom and I don't think she's on the pill should I suggest she does go on it ?

Schism

If you're getting that worked up about it then just don't do it. It's the only way you can assure yourself 100%

Talliesin

If you correctly use contraception the chances of her getting pregnant is slight (lower with pill than with condom, lower again with both, and of course the pill does nothing to prevent STIs). It's there, it can happen (every one of us who talks on this forum about the importance of using contraception can still end up with an unwanted pregnancy, or for that matter an STI, because we're managing a risk rather than removing it) but the chances are slight. If I were in your position I'd probably say the risks were low enough to still do it, but nobody can make that decision for you, only the two of you.

If you have non-penetrative sex you can bring the chances down to zero.

If you are just so stressed about your worries then you'll probably have a better night just having a meal and a bit of a chat over the rest of the wine. There's no point doing anything if it's just a source of worry. Sex is supposed to be enjoyable, after all.

Phototoxin

Talliesin wrote: »

If you have non-penetrative sex you can bring the chances down to zero.

not wholly true, rubbing genitalia together without penetration can result in pregnancy if fluids spill.

if you are speaking of STIs then there are other ways to contract them.

Regardless of what you're feeling, you should talk to her about it. That's where intimacy comes from, and intimacy makes everything much more fun

talk about it indeed

Ghost Girl

You say you both want to, yet your on a website asking if you should because you have certain fears, so i'd say then you don't want to do it, if you did you wouldnt be asking or venting about it here!!

And if pregnancy is the fear, then don't go there, I presume you mean pregnancy fears even with contraception? If you have that much of a fear, even if you use contraception you won't enjoy it because you're worrying, so forget it, you're not ready for this.

Talliesin

Phototoxin wrote: »

not wholly true, rubbing genitalia together without penetration can result in pregnancy if fluids spill.

No, completely true because you can bring it down to zero. It depends on which non-penetrative acts you engage in.

LegacyUser

Ghost Girl wrote: »

You say you both want to, yet your on a website asking if you should because you have certain fears, so i'd say then you don't want to do it, if you did you wouldnt be asking or venting about it here!!

I do want to it's just I'd hate the worst to happen that's all .

Ghost Girl wrote: »

And if pregnancy is the fear, then don't go there

Don't go there

Ghost Girl wrote: »

I presume you mean pregnancy fears even with contraception? If you have that much of a fear, even if you use contraception you won't enjoy it because you're worrying, so forget it, you're not ready for this.

Yea even with a condom,it's not that I'm not ready for it....ah I can't really put it into words what I'm trying to say and what I am saying it's obviously coming out wrong I'm sorry.

Ghost Girl

The 1 OP wrote: »

Yea even with a condom,it's not that I'm not ready for it....ah I can't really put it into words what I'm trying to say and what I am saying it's obviously coming out wrong I'm sorry.

Don't have to apologise, but the one thing I would say is if you are worrying it will spoil it....so some how ease those worries, talk it over with a GP or some thing.

iPlop

Fat Pie Lot wrote: »

If it's something you both want to do, and you're both over-age, what's to stop you? Fear of pregnancy shouldn't be a factor if you're using proper contraception. Is there something else you're worried about?

Or just whip it out in time and youll be grand:)

Wibbs

Septic Leper this is the second post of yours so far today not on topic and taking the píss. This is PI not After Hours. Your humour would be best served in the latter. Read the charter of this forum or you'll be taking a break. Final warning.