present for the bride

dohda

Hi All,

I see from an earlier post that a pressie for the bride on the morning of the wedding is the norm which is fine as I had planned on this anyway. My question is related to the speeches. Is the groom supposed to give the bride a present when he gives his speech? If so what sort of present are we talking about????

I'm not too read up on wedding etiquette I'm afraid.....

Little Miss Cutie

I've been to a fair few weddings over the years and never seen this happen. As far as I know it is just pressies to the mothers and bridesmaid, sometimes the bestman/groomsmen but never heard of pressie for bride!

dohda

Thats good news. Not because I would have a problem buying a present but I would be useless at picking something to give her in front of all those people!! Not been to too many weddings and it's been a while so I was not sure.

gaz wac

I had to give two prez cos it was also her b-day that day but gave her the presents the day before the wedding on our own.

Little Miss Cutie

I didn't realise until recently that presents on the morning of the wedding were common either tbh. I guess it is a way to settle the nerves.

I hope your wedding goes well and you both have a great day!

dohda

Thanks, hopefully will go off without a hitch!

(you better all be right about this no pressie in the evening thing! Will be a wshort wedding otherwise....)

Enii

Generally you would give the bride a pressie the morning of the wedding (you would have arranged it with the mother). A necklace is nice because she could wear it on the day (the bride could have picked it already but if she has then send her a bunch of flowers with the pressie).

victor1

maybe get her a nice picture of yourself framed for posterity, that'd be cool

barbiegirl

Traditionally you get her something and it's given before the church when she's getting ready. Also she normally gets you something, my oh got a lovely watch and I got the bracelet I wore on the day :-). But remember small and thoughtful can be just as meaningful :-)

tattykitty

Can anyone tell me when this present-buying lark became a tradition? Surely the fact that you're committing to spending your life with (and unconditionally loving) the other person is enough of a special gift? I'm assuming the gift idea was dreamed up by some corporation or other, wanting to suck yet more money out of people. All these "trimmings" drive me bats - wedding favours, gifts to all and sundry, matching this, themed that...fair enough if you have a small fortune and choose to go down that road, but it's all those people that feel pressured into following the "tradition" of spending cash they really don't have, who I feel bad for. :mad:

Sorry, rant over.

BroomBurner

+1 Tattykitty

I also agree that just calling something a tradition (which is what I'm assuming happened in this case), doesn't actually mean it is a tradition.

I'm guessing the first conversation came about as:

<greedy wife-to-be> Oh, honeyshnuckums, what are you getting me for our wedding day?
<more-cash-than-brains hubby-to-be> What do you mean, bunny-features? Am I supposed to get you something on top of the lavish wedding we are splashing out on?
<GWTB> Why, yes, darling, my best friend XXX received a beautiful diamond necklace from her husband, it's a tradition you know
<MCTBHTB> Oh, a tradition, you say? Oh, well in that case, I must fetch you a small castle, or what-not, as your present.

Hence, a "tradition" was born. Obviously, I have well researched this tradition...

hunnymonster

tattykitty wrote: »

Can anyone tell me when this present-buying lark became a tradition?

At least 36 years as my mum still has the present my dad gave her the morning they got married. It wasn't big but I remember as kids getting a big kick out of it coming down out of the wardrobe for us to look at, now, with my dad dead it's a lovely memory of him. Presents are not always commercial, hallmark invented consumerism....

NextSteps

I thought you were meant to give a teabag?

gaz wac

UB wrote: »

I thought you were meant to give a teabag?

You do..but not until the wedding night !!:D

*logs off*

nolly23

My dad bought my mum pearls for her gift and that was 45 years ago. so it was definately tradition back then.

bensoneb

We got married a few weeks ago and actually had the conversation about pressies beforehand. I brought up the conversation as I didn't want my husband forking out any more money as he had already bought me a fantastic engagement ring earlier on in the year and had also bought me my wedding jewellery. I told him that getting married was the big thrill for me on the day so we shouldn't buy each other presents. I really didn't see the sense in it.

Having said that, I still bought him a present because I always felt that it's unfair that the guys have to fork out on engagement rings and we get off scott free. So I bought him a very expensive watch but when giving it to him, I explained that it was my version of an engagement ring.

Regarding tradition, I did some very traditional things on the day but that doesn't mean that I had to go with ALL traditions. Pick and choose the ones you like!