Essential House Rules

HouseHippo

in shared housing to avoid arguments etc....

I'd have to say

1. Don't borrow other people's things without asking
2. If the bathroom doesn't ahve a lock KNOCK!!
3. Don't walk around naked when other people are in the house!!Not everyone wants to see your bits.

iPlop

HouseHippo wrote: »

in shared housing to avoid arguments etc....


I'd have to say

1. Don't borrow other people's things without asking
2. If the bathroom doesn't ahve a lock KNOCK!!
3. Don't walk around naked when other people are in the house!!Not everyone wants to see your bits.

5. don't open your lunchbox and then waft it with the tv guide
6.don't piss all over the bog and leave it there
7.don't clean the dishes with your dirty sock.I had a mate do this
he had 1 sock on and the other was in his hand cleaning the poxy dishes

brianthebard

Septic Leper wrote: »

5. don't open your lunchbox and then waft it with the tv guide
6.don't piss all over the bog and leave it there
7.don't clean the dishes with your dirty sock.I had a mate do this
he had 1 sock on and the other was in his hand cleaning the poxy dishes

this is why i prefer living with girls!

taidghbaby

dont live with wimmins

HouseHippo

brianthebard wrote: »

this is why i prefer living with girls!

Feminine hygeine products left around the house......bit gross dont do it myself but have had mates who just put em in the bin no tissue or nothing. RANK!

iPlop

brianthebard wrote: »

this is why i prefer living with girls!

yeah it's better than havin the place smelling like Sh*** all the time.Although I lived in a house with a girl that was a complete
knacker.The place was in a jock the whole time

HouseHippo

Septic Leper wrote: »

5. don't open your lunchbox and then waft it with the tv guide
6.don't piss all over the bog and leave it there
7.don't clean the dishes with your dirty sock.I had a mate do this
he had 1 sock on and the other was in his hand cleaning the poxy dishes

haha thats one way of doing it i suppose

brianthebard

HouseHippo wrote: »

Feminine hygeine products left around the house......bit gross dont do it myself but have had mates who just put em in the bin no tissue or nothing. RANK!

em thats a bit disturbing,now i have mental pics,thanks a lot!

HouseHippo

brianthebard wrote: »

em thats a bit disturbing,now i have mental pics,thanks a lot!

Woooo hooops :P

From my experience:

Living with 1 girl = clean
Living with group of girls = unbelievably messy.

Jesus Wept

Don't dip your penis in the peanut butter, it's inconsiderate.

iPlop

HouseHippo wrote: »

haha thats one way of doing it i suppose

Yeah but this bloke was a knacker ,he had the room with the ensiute and my girlfriend was in the main bathroom havin' a shower so I asked him could I use his bog and he said yes.Holy mother of jasus his bog was coffee coloured ,I mean the U bend was Chocolate brown ,F****n pikey knacker ,and the smell of feet I mean it wasn't ouder eater's he needed it was ouder savages!!:eek:

HouseHippo

Septic Leper wrote: »

Yeah but this bloke was a knacker ,he had the room with the ensiute and my girlfriend was in the main bathroom havin' a shower so I asked him could I use his bog and he said yes.Holy mother of jasus his bog was coffee coloured ,I mean the U bend was Chocolate brown ,F****n pikey knacker ,and the smell of feet I mean it wasn't ouder eater's he needed it was ouder savages!!:eek:

Hahaha housemate from hell.Nothing worse than a scuzz stained toilet

HouseHippo

The-Rigger wrote: »

Don't dip your penis in the peanut butter, it's inconsiderate.

esp the chunky, the bits get stuck under the skin and then there is less bits for everyone else.
Unless you want to put em back in....but thats gross

knird evol

14. A smile is just a frown upside down.
15. Always put your best foot forward.
17. Give the ball in fast, early and low.
f. Always comment your code.

HouseHippo

Deleted User wrote: »

From my experience:

Living with 1 girl = clean
Living with group of girls = unbelievably messy.

Yeah but didn't they have sexy pillow fights and walk around in their underwear lol

GirlInterrupted

taidghbaby wrote: »

dont live with wimmins

Maybe you'll never get the chance anyway.........:P

taidghbaby

GirlInterrupted wrote: »

Maybe you'll never get the chance anyway.........:P

well with me being a rampant homosexual it probly wont matter :rolleyes:

HouseHippo

taidghbaby wrote: »

well with me being a rampant homosexual it probly wont matter :rolleyes:

Mybe that quick wit will get ya somewhere

taidghbaby

HouseHippo wrote: »

Mybe that quick wit will get ya somewhere

hasnt worked yet

or has it :cool:

GirlInterrupted

taidghbaby wrote: »

hasnt worked yet

or has it :cool:

Not yet I think, not yet:p.

taidghbaby

GirlInterrupted wrote: »

Not yet I think, not yet:p.

give it time though......give it time

HouseHippo

taidghbaby wrote: »

give it time though......give it time

getting there

GirlInterrupted

HouseHippo wrote: »

getting there

Good things come to those who wait....;)

Trojan911

taidghbaby wrote: »

well with me being a rampant homosexual it probly wont matter :rolleyes:

= clean house.

taidghbaby

HouseHippo wrote: »

Yeah but didn't they have sexy pillow fights and walk around in their underwear lol

i was living with the wrong girls

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

If you're silly enough to do the dishes unasked once, don't be suprised when you're expected to do it from that point onwards.

On the peanut butter topic, throw away peanutbutter jars as soon as you're finished eating it or smearing it on your bits or w/e, it STINKS after a while. My flat last year was pretty messy, everybody's stomachs were pretty strong due to rotten eggs, solid milk, carbonated orange juice etc, but all five of us very nearly puked at the smell from an old peanutbutter jar, complete with scrapings of peanutbutter turned to black mould, which had ended up under the couch somehow. God it was gross. We (well, I) kept it and used to make visitors smell it.

sam34

HouseHippo wrote: »

Feminine hygeine products left around the house......bit gross dont do it myself but have had mates who just put em in the bin no tissue or nothing. RANK!

abso;lutely disgusting....had one housemate who used do this... really really gross:(

HouseHippo

sam34 wrote: »

abso;lutely disgusting....had one housemate who used do this... really really gross:(

God love you. I only seen it at a party in a friends houe. Her flatmate was a bit of a skank used to leave used condoms around too....

Heard a rumour she used to wash em, dry em out on the clothes horse and use em again:P

Firetrap

• When you do the dishes, dry the feckin' things and put them back in the press. None of that leaving dishes on the draining board :mad:
• Have to admit the old used tampons in the bathroom bin creeps me out too. And I'm a wimmin!
• If you're going to have sex, don't stay at it all night and keep the house awake

rainbow kirby

Do your fair share of the housework, do NOT touch my food without asking (I'm generous with it when I'm asked, but people nicking it gets on my tits), and don't use all the hot water.

And don't be an obnoxious couple...

newballsplease

dont let your mate and his bird shag in ur housemates bed!

flanum

accomodation forum tbh!

Don't share with a Welsh "crwydriaid" who recycles the toilet paper by putting it on the window sill to use a second or third (or turd) time.. (EYUK).

SoupyNorman

Take the fuking bin out once in a while.

'Girls' - Its not your god given right to watch every single soap of an evening.

Dont bring back complete strangers.

bravestarr082

bravestarr082 wrote: »

Dont bring back complete strangers.

Especially ones that want the beat the crap out of you!

I once opened the door to a knock and this "greebo" jumped past me and started beating the crap out of one of the housemates, then he just walked out again. :eek:

Dodgy drugs deal or something... what a shithole

Silenceisbliss

HouseHippo wrote: »

1. Don't walk around naked when other people are in the house!!Not everyone wants to see your bits.

LIES....LIES AND SLANDER!!!

A_M101

• Don't let cereal go hard on the edges of bowls
• Don't leave rice/pasta sitting in the drain because you can't be arsed to properly strain!

Hail 2 Da Chimp

Firetrap wrote: »

• If you're going to have sex, don't stay at it all night and keep the house awake

Huh??? Whats the point in doing it otherwise?

kayos

Dont leave your clothes in the Washing machine for ages after its finished. I lived with a couple of girls who did this always annoying trying to get a wash on to find clothes in the washer. Emptied it one day and being nice hung up all the clothes for the girl. She then went ape at how dare I hang up her smalls! Heavens sake they are nickers not like she was in them at the time.

Oh the other washing machine related pet peeve..... do you really need to put on a wash with 1 or 2 items! At the very least hit the econ or half load button if doing it.

chin_grin

- clean all drains of facial hair or hair from yer bits.
- only use your own razer to do the above.
- don't open the bread bin, realize the bread has exploded in a cloud of sporidium, only to close it again like nothing happened.
- have more than one telly in the house, and if you want to play resident evil 4 for four hours ensure to pull a complete hissy fit so no-one will ever ask you to change the channel.
- blare your death metal music AT ALL TIMES. When cleaning the dishes. When cooking. When pushing dinner out your poop chute. It helps to have those collapsible speakers you can plug in to your mp3 player.

- oh and fill the kettle for the whole household.
- and save energy, y'know switch lights off when you leave the room etc.

Steve_o

bravestarr082 wrote: »

Take the fuking bin out once in a while.

'Girls' - Its not your god given right to watch every single soap of an evening.

Dont bring back complete strangers.

Agreed

Double Agreed... you don't need EVERY soap....

I friend of mine brought 5 people back to MY house one night after the pub and they robbed us blind... needless to say, he's not very welcome anymore...

Hail 2 Da Chimp wrote: »

Huh??? Whats the point in doing it otherwise?

Yeah......explain yourself!!!

HouseHippo

Hail 2 Da Chimp wrote: »

Huh??? Whats the point in doing it otherwise?

ooooo stamina

Silenceisbliss

just shout out words like AIDS, PREGNANCY, SYPHOLIS, GENITAL WARTS.

it may not stop them, it may even give the lad the edge to go even longer...but youll have fun

HouseHippo

Silenceisbliss wrote: »

just shout out words like AIDS, PREGNANCY, SYPHOLIS, GENITAL WARTS.

it may not stop them, it may even give the lad the edge to go even longer...but youll have fun

Put up some medical photo's of various std's in the house. Wherever anyone is likely to shag.

JangoFett

I have a few rules but the only one I'm a real stickler about is that the only drugs allowed in my house at sessions is weed and pills, I hate people on speed and coke and well, all the other ones

donnaille

JangoFett wrote: »

I have a few rules but the only one I'm a real stickler about is that the only drugs allowed in my house at sessions is weed and pills, I hate people on speed and coke and well, all the other ones

You're dead cool:rolleyes:

JangoFett

donnaille wrote: »

You're dead cool:rolleyes:

Its not to be cool, its just a rule I have, people on speed and coke tend to be very argumentative and aggressive and I don't like that

+1 for the typical "I'm passively aggressively looking down my nose at you" boardsie reply though...well done!

donnaille

JangoFett wrote: »

Its not to be cool, its just a rule I have, people on speed and coke tend to be very argumentative and aggressive and I don't like that

+1 for the typical "I'm passively aggressively looking down my nose at you" boardsie reply though...well done!

snap! you got me:(

JangoFett

Can we hug and make up?

I think you just misunderstood what I was saying

So...friends?

Anti

If you break it - Fix it.
If you finish it - Replace it.
If you dirty it - Wash it.