Stand up and Be Proud!

Jules

what do you guys think of the plus size debate?

which is more attractive -



or



We have tried to have many discussion about weight and they generally turn into a bitch fest. We had a great discussion on abortion. So lets try again.

I find there is an awful lot of judging women just because of their size. If you see an plus size person generally people think they are lazy or eats lots etc. Not always the case but can be at times. But if they are happy etc what harm are they doing to others. Why do people have to comment and call names why can't people just accept it?

Jules

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mRwHv32AbTQ

Love this girl - http://www.youtube.com/user/chubbygirl27

Gyalist

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

*stands up*

My name is Mordeth, and I'm fat.

Jules

Mordy another comment like that and you will be banned , it goes against the spirit of the thread.

ok he edited the comment... i'm not that crazy!

Zaph

Maybe I have to be a woman to get it, but that first video was unfunnier than Lee Evans, which is some achievement.

Jules

Ah just one womans way of facing the every day discrimination that is put up to plus size people.

Zaph

I've no problem with that, but I just thought she was incredibly unfunny. I'm in no way prudish, but I'm generally of the opinion that if someone doing stand-up swears every second word then they're covering up an obvious lack of funny material.

Anyway I don't want to derail your thread so don't mind me, I'm just having a bad week.

Silverfish

I just don't think female comedians are funny


Especially if they have to swear like that to be funny.


Its why I'm not a comedian, I swear like a docker.

Nevyn

Zaph wrote: »

Anyway I don't want to derail your thread so don't mind me, I'm just having a bad week.

*hug*

Zaph

Thaedydal wrote: »

*hug*

Thanks

Flamed Diving

Each to their own, I guess. I personally like big arses on girls, some guys like heavier women because they have bigger boobs. Its all relative!

Creamy Goodness

Silverfish wrote: »

I just don't think female comedians are funny

this, look at that maeve higgins one.

i'd rather endure a mauling by vicious dogs that shoot bees when they bark.

and i'm allergic to bee stings.

MagicMarker

curves ftw!

Peared

Jules in the interests of fairness I have to say that the examples you picked are not great. The top lady is only slightly large, maybe a 14 and you wouldnt call her fat but the skinny girl is very skinny.

I prefer the skinny one btw and I see nowt wrong with that.

Jules

In the interest of fairness they are both the same woman.

Peared

Feck right off!


What?

How?

Is it a before and after?

Flamed Diving

Could someone attach the pictures to a post, I cant view them the way they are at work.

Jules

Yep same woman...

http://www.fabulousmag.co.uk/diets/diet_crystal_renn_issue_016.php

dr.bollocko

I for one am not a fan of this stick thin craze. More than likely, they dont eat meat or watch sports. What else is there for me?
But this is all down to a definition again isn't it?
Is curvy or voluptuous a nice way of calling somebody overweight.
I for one prefer the apples to the bee-stings.
Hope that wasnt off topic.

challengemaster

I don't like either (or should that be just her).

Although thats probably based on her just being unattractive(imo).

Peared

Im gonna assume she was a skinny model and got sick of starving and let herself put on some weight.

She looks fab either way, again my personal preferance is for the skinny.
Although I am not as thin as that myself I think I would be happy that size whereas I would not be happy if I became as big as the other pic.

But Im not a boy, they have different eyes and brains and different other stuff.

Jules

There is nothing wrong with personal preference, horses for courses and all that but what i am asking is why do people feel the need to put down plus size people. If the mags and tv shows only had plus size models would that be the norm?

Peared

Yep it's sh1t.

Women are seen as lesser people if they are ugly or bigger than a 10, not only by lots of men but also by other women.

Usually when men hear the word fat, they think of someone really really fat, but when womwn think of fat, they think of anything a stone or more heavier than their current weight. We are our own worst enemies. (and yes im generalising)

Morbidly obese is one thing and people will always comment on it, in the same way they comment on anorexic girls, both are ick.

It is, I think, a reflection of the fashion of the times. So maybe it will change. But probably not in our lifetime.

Jules

Totally agreed, woman are total bitches to each other, all smiles etc but would stab ya in the back as soon as soon as, a lot of women that is. And yes i know morbidly obese is one thing but there are also men out there that like that and women who are proud to be that. And who are we to judge?

Peared

Peared wrote: »

Women are seen as lesser people if they are ugly or bigger than a 10, not only by lots of men but also by other women.

I don't get why people are bothered about the looks of people who they aren't with.

Unless it literally hurt your eyes to look at them.

Peared

Moonbaby wrote: »

I don't get why people are bothered about the looks of people who they aren't with.

Unless it literally hurt your eyes to look at them.

Yeah I know.

But people are pass-remarkable assh0les sometimes.

*shrugs*

omb0wyn5ehpij9

Out of the 2 pictures of that woman, i think the first picture is a lot more attractive. I dont like the look in the second picture of a woman who is too skinny. I would rather a bit of meat on the bones of a girl!

Eviledna

It's funny, I feel as sorry for ridiculously skinny girls as I do for ridiculously obese girls. I always assume (and bold me for assuming) that they are having a hard time, usually because they both look delicate, and unable to cope being beyond the beyonds, either ends of the proverbial scale.
The model looks alot better as a size 16 imo.

Me, I prefer a more normal look and think a size 12 is perfect(for me, for my height, it's all relative). Just enough chub to have nice curves and boobs, but not enough chub to form a second me. I am not a size 12, though I would like to be, and am trying to be. I beat myself up about it too much sometimes, usually around that time.
I think a healthy body image is something to be cherished if you have it, and sought as much as any weightloss/gain if you don't.
I also find that when I'm preoccupied with my weight, I'm not occupying my brain with the right things often enough.

So I'll stand and be proud to be a size 15. Inbetween is usually where you will find me in most situations.;)

Nevyn

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yUTJQIBI1oA

Nevyn

Am I proud that I am over weight ? Nope

Am I going to let it stop me living my life ? Nope

Do I let it and what other's think impact on me ? Nope

Do I want to loose weight ? Nope, I do want to change my shape and am working on that.

Am I ever going to be skinny ? Nope unless I become seriously ill.

Am I bothered that my body is different after having kids and post natal depression ?
At times but I would not be who I am today if I had not have experienced the things I have and I don't see the point of beating myself up about it or crippling my self emotionally as that won't help me evolve or make the changes I want.

Havermeyer

The first pic.

Curvy ladies are hotter, imo.

MILF

This is kind of a sore point with me, as much as it pains me to say. I'm a size 17 (if there is such a thing!) I used to be a size 20, borderline 22 because I ate myself silly as I was in such a horrible relationship and found comfort in food. I found the strength to leave that relationship and realised there was more to life then sitting at home and eating. I started to gain the courage to go out again and experience life and slowly I noticed the weight dropping off. I dropped down to a 14/16 and lost 4 and a smidge stone (pat on the back for me!!) and gained a new (fabulous) boyf.
Just when I was FINALLY happy with my weight, I got pregnant! I managed not to put on too much weight while pregnant but I suffered with Post Natal Depression after and all of a sudden all those feelings came back to me from before and next thing I knew the weight started creeping back up.
Ive now found myself researching tummy tucks and lipo online and reading endless mags on how all the celebs are eating to stay slim and I'm just SO SICK thinking about "should I be really eating this" and "Is he gonna leave me now that I've put on a bit of weight" and thinking constantly about my weight and the fact that there's pressure out there from society to be a certain size and, god forbid, if you're anything over that then your just classed as fat. End of story.

Its only been 7 months since I had the baby but I'm so sick of myself!

Sorry I went off on a rant but I'm wound up!!

Nevyn

Comfort eating is the devil.
You need to change what you are snacking on.

Cleb Moms who are back in shape like that are freaks.
[nsfw]http://theshapeofamother.com[nsfw]

The thing is milf you have done it before you can do it again but you really need to look at where those insecurity issues are coming from.

MILF

You're right, comfort eating is beyond the devil. Ive really dont know what to say. I dont really know where it comes from. Part of me is bone lazy with preparing food and having the motivation to work all day and then come home and cook when there's a takeaway menu in the press and part of me is like have I really got the willpower and the determination to stop eating crap and start eating the proper things.

Dont get me wrong, my whole diet isnt s***. I do eat breakfast, I dont really have a sweet tooth, I dont drink fizzy drinks apart from maybe in the cinema and I drink loads and loads of water every day. I never exercise and I know that's a big part of losing weight and I think that's where I lose motivation.

I don't know...

iMax

A personal bugbear of mine is the use of the words "Plus Sized", "Big Boned" & "Large". It's fat. Plain and simple. Don't wanna be fat? eat less & exercise more.

I'm male, about 20Lbs overweight & have been pretty much all my life, actually I have been heavier (about 15.5st - now 14.5 st) I have man boobs & a stomach. I've left weight watchers twice because eating my "Daily points Allowance" caused me to gain weight (is that a first?)

I have a really slow metabolism & a very sweet tooth. However, I'm also happy about me. Because of my 44inch chest if I was my proper BMI I would be a very strange shape.

All the "Plus Sized", "Big Boned" & "Large" does is put you in a box. And as you all know everybody's a different shape & not every shape fits every box.

MILF

Apparently if you have a slow metabolism the way forward is "Green Tea Extract". They're for sale in Holland & Barrett for €6.99 and it flushes you out and speeds up your metabolic rate. Get ready to wee a lot though if you do take them.

See, all this reading of celeb mags sometimes does pay off!

Nevyn

MILF wrote: »

You're right, comfort eating is beyond the devil. Ive really dont know what to say. I dont really know where it comes from. Part of me is bone lazy with preparing food and having the motivation to work all day and then come home and cook when there's a takeaway menu in the press and part of me is like have I really got the willpower and the determination to stop eating crap and start eating the proper things.

Dont get me wrong, my whole diet isnt s***. I do eat breakfast, I dont really have a sweet tooth, I dont drink fizzy drinks apart from maybe in the cinema and I drink loads and loads of water every day. I never exercise and I know that's a big part of losing weight and I think that's where I lose motivation.

I don't know...

You have had a baby and your whole world and how you live your life and the demands on you and your time have changed drastically.
Hell you have not even gotten over the first year and also it takes two years for your pelvis, back and muscles to regroup after having a child.

Your not supermom and nor should you try to be but you need to treat yourself better and you will get there.

MILF

Well that's true. It's actually baby no.2 - the first one's 5 now plus I had a caesarean on the two of them. That alone means I'm never gonna have a flat tum but I just wanna feel good about myself again and feel confident in my own skin. I miss that feeling.

Nevyn

Even if it is your second it is still a huge change as you now how an infant and a 5 year old to juggle.

Yes, the key is being confident in yourself and in treating yourself better and eating better which will make you feel better and give you more engery so you can go for a walk/swim or get on the excerise bike ect. All easier said then done, I know but make one change a day and you will see the difference. The Deit and nutrition forum has lots of useful stuff in it.

Kazobel

OK I got a banning from the LGB forum for this same argument but I'm sorry it applies here too, "Be proud"? but be proud of what? pride comes from an achievement, something you've worked towards so unless you delibrately ate 10 pound of ice cream to become a size 16/18/20 you didn't achieve it, it's like saying be proud because you have black hair, you didn't achieve it, you were born with it. Now look, all this "be proud" sh*t is just that, Ophra/Ricki Lake sh*t. Fcuk being proud, be proud because your kid got 9 honours in his/her leaving cert, be proud because your 1 year old said her first words, be proud because you managed to get the house cleaned, the laundry and ironing done and dinner cooked and somehow still managed to have 20 minutes at the end of the day to yourself but admit that all you are with your weight is happy, if you're content in your weight then there's no need for a thread like this, there's no need for a declaration. The sheer act of creating the thread proves that there's no pride otherwise there'd be no need for that acceptance from others. Look so what if you're size 14/16/18/20/22...etc as long as you're happy who cares but you? honestly the alternative isn't any better, in the last year I've gone from a 12 to an 8 and I feel like sh*t, my body has no shape, I've no arse, my face has become sunken and I'd give anything to have curves like yous but right now weight is just dropping off me and no one knows why and finding clothes is near impossible. Being a size zero isn't a male ideal, it's a female ideal, no girl does that to themselves because they think they'll look better to men, they do it to compete with other women but the women they are competing with also have the delusion that that's what men are looking for too but men aren't, men like hips, men like arses, men like tits. I'd bet any amount of money that in a night club the size 14/16 girl gets more chat ups than the stick insect. Forget the pride sh*t just be happy and love yourself and no matter what weight you are then you'll always look hot .

LadyJ

iMax wrote: »

A personal bugbear of mine is the use of the words "Plus Sized", "Big Boned" & "Large". It's fat. Plain and simple. Don't wanna be fat? eat less & exercise more.

Plus size models can be as small as size 12 AFAIK. I'm a size 12 and not a bit over weight. I'm 5'10" and have wide hips. I have plenty of pics up around the place so you can judge for yourselves. Plus sized I may be but fat I am not.

minidazzler

In my opinion If a girl is big I would be much more attracted if she either
a) Is comfortable in herself.
b) Is working on it if she is not comfortable in herself.


I will not be attracted if:
a) She is not comfortable in herself and does nothing to try and make herself comfortable.
b) She is not comfortable and complains about it and then does nothing about it.

I like bigger girls, I am attracted sexually to curvy girls, but it's mostly personality with me and if a girl complains to me about their weight and does not TRY to work on it I will not be able to stand them. If she says she's fat and is obviously not even big I will tell her to fck off and stop trying to e a drama queen (If I think they are just trying to get attention.)

Now if a girl complains to me about her weight but then goes on to say oh I go to the gym (and what not) I am totally supportive but I will tell them that they don't need to. Other people's perception of someone shouldn't matter.

Big girls, you are Beautiful.

Jesus Wept

minidazzler wrote: »

Big girls, you are Beautiful.

It can be Sir Mix-a-Lot time now?

MILF

Well it's 9.15 in the morning and last night after I posted I went on the diet and nutrition forum and read through a heap of them. I went to bed motivated. I HAVE lost 4 stone before! So what if I put on a little over a stone while pregnant. I'm not one of these stupid celebs who ping back to size zero 30 minutes after giving birth. I dont have a personal trainer or a gym subscription. I dont have the time to go to the gym with 2 kids. I do, however, now have some ammo and the sheer will to get rid of the stone and 5 lbs I need to get rid of. After reading www.theshapeofamother.com, I know that I'm NEVER gonna change my tummy completely or make it completely flat, like I used to want. The stretch marks and caesarean scars I have tell a story about the 2 pregnancies I've been through and I should learn to love them.
I know I can do it again and I'm gonna post back every once in a while with my progress! I should thank all the men who posted saying that curvy is sexy!

Nevyn

MILF wrote: »

Well it's 9.15 in the morning and last night after I posted I went on the diet and nutrition forum and read through a heap of them. I went to bed motivated. I HAVE lost 4 stone before! So what if I put on a little over a stone while pregnant. I'm not one of these stupid celebs who ping back to size zero 30 minutes after giving birth. I dont have a personal trainer or a gym subscription. I dont have the time to go to the gym with 2 kids. I do, however, now have some ammo and the sheer will to get rid of the stone and 5 lbs I need to get rid of. After reading www.theshapeofamother.com, I know that I'm NEVER gonna change my tummy completely or make it completely flat, like I used to want. The stretch marks and caesarean scars I have tell a story about the 2 pregnancies I've been through and I should learn to love them.
I know I can do it again and I'm gonna post back every once in a while with my progress! I should thank all the men who posted saying that curvy is sexy!

I am so happy for you MILF.

Zee Deveel

Great post, MILF! Great to read so much positivity!

Personally, while I don't think (now) that I'm fat, I've certainly got plenty of curves, and wouldn't be anywhere near comfortable in clothes which showed off my belly/bum. When I was 16/17, and a lot smaller, and was being measured by a friend doing a dressmaking course for my debs dress, she was absolutely shocked that I was a size 14. I'd never thought of 14 as being 'big' until that point. Why the big shock? I've got a pair of hips, dammit! My friend ended up in Hickeys, getting several experienced shop assistants to measure me up, and they were all shocked that I was such a massive size!

I can safely say that yes, I have put on weight since that age, and that yes, I do feel quite self conscious about it on the rare occasion flesh gets flashed, but damn, I'm not fat, and I'm certainly nowhere near obese. I despise the promotion of skinny girls as sexy or ideal shapes. I understand there are plenty of girls that just naturally are that size, and that's cool, variety is the spice of life. I just hate that anything other than that is so often considered so unsexy. Grr!

I'm slowly learning to be proud of myself, and my figure. I'm relatively fit, quite active, and yep, I has curves! It's taken me so so long to get to where I am on that front though.. Fair play for starting this thread, OP, and everyone else with encouraging comments

stovelid

I don't like obesity or haggard, overly skinny women, but there is a world of sizes in between.

Often a 'thin' woman can be gorgeous; often a not-so-thin/'curvy'/'plus size' woman can be gorgeous. I don't really like being pinned down to one definition of what an 'attractive' woman is.

I think a lot of men feel the same way, but feel that they should cheerlead for either side when the debate comes up.

marti101

Jules wrote: »

what do you guys think of the plus size debate?

which is more attractive -



or



We have tried to have many discussion about weight and they generally turn into a bitch fest. We had a great discussion on abortion. So lets try again.

I find there is an awful lot of judging women just because of their size. If you see an plus size person generally people think they are lazy or eats lots etc. Not always the case but can be at times. But if they are happy etc what harm are they doing to others. Why do people have to comment and call names why can't people just accept it?

I dont think the top girl is what id call overweight she actually looks in proportion,the other girl doesnt look that skinny either she looks athletic rather than her ribs sticking out.I say live and let live its nobody elses business.Saying that you would never know they were the same girl.I remember growing up i was so skinny people dont realise it can be hard for extremely skinny women to get clothes to fit properly as they have no hips/arse.Now ive put a bit of weight on as i had baby 5 months ago but what i try to do now is go for a walk every day even only for ten minutes and i make dinner my main meal but the worst thing is sitting in the house bored at least if i was in work i couldnt eat.

Gauge

I don't get why it always has to be either/or, no wonder these threads always end up in a two sided debate- everyone seems to forget that women come in sizes between the extremes.

Jules

This is not about being fat, it is about pride in yourself no matter the size you are. Its about self acceptance and people not judging you on what you look like but for the person that you are on the inside. I look at threads on AH like fat girl not allow into club or some other such crap. And it always ends up in a bunch off assbags feeling the need the make horrid comments about people who are bigger. I want this thread for people who are bigger to be able to come in a talk about their experiences and how they feel. Without worry of stupid comments.