''Oh the Shame"... In a restaurant?

adsgirl

Most embarassing moment in a restaurant?

Mine ..asked were the vegetables orgasmic:o

The Master

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=56805819&postcount=46

javaboy

My sister asked for a Stiffy Tockey pudding only she stopped when she realised she'd screwed up so it was just "I'll have a stiffy. "

Captain Ginger

Was trying to show off to the girlfriend how much I knew about wine and made a joke about how bad Merlot is, ordered the wine and then low and behold after saying how nice it was it turned out to be a Merlot and I had not noticed. I was a plank.

adsgirl

The Master wrote: »

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=56805819&postcount=46

Okay permisson to ask a few questions?
What did the hot blonde do?
Did other diners notice?
Are you barred?
Did you get therapy later?

The Master

What did the hot blonde do? collapse with laughter
Did other diners notice? yes , they couldnt help but notice
Are you barred? for life
Did you get therapy later? yes but it didnt work

Cuddlesworth

Do you still wear the pants?

Quality

A fella I was going out with asked for the apple and China Man Pudding...

Suppossed to be cinnamon:o:o:o

javaboy

The Master wrote: »

What did the hot blonde do? collapse with laughter
Did other diners notice? yes , they couldnt help but notice
Are you barred? for life
Did you get therapy later? yes but it didnt work

You should have asked her if she'd ever seen 2 girls 1 cup. You already had most of the ingredients. (maybe a fancy wineglass instead of a cup)

The Master

Cuddlesworth wrote: »

Do you still wear the pants?

Yes , but to be honest there starting to stink a bit now

javaboy wrote: »

You should have asked her if she'd ever seen 2 girls 1 cup. You already had most of the ingredients. (maybe a fancy wineglass instead of a cup)

I wish I had thought of that at the time

Dinter

On a date in a fairly crowded restaurant I was dying to use the toilet. Of course I hardly wanted to say that so tried to slip away nonchalantly.

I leaned over and freshened the wine then stood up, placed my napkin on the seat, perhaps murmured a bon mot followed by an "excuse me for a moment", turned around, tripped on my neighbours handbag that she'd thoughtfuly placed beside me, felt myself falling, time slowed, crashed into neighbours table knocking dinner and drinks flying.

Jeez possibly the most embarrassing thing ever as everyone in the restaurant laughed thinking I was drunk except for the couple whose dinner I ruined who did not see the funny side. Even now I blush when I remember standing there, half covered in food debris, looking at my date amidst gales of laughter. So tempted to just turn around and walk out.

KBarry

My mum asked for hundreds and thousands (ie those sprinkly things you put on cakes) with her salad. She meant thousand island dressing. She doesn't get out much.

DubArk

As a younger person I worked in a restaurant as a waiter. The policy with drinks such as bottled water, beer etc was that we half pour them, so we would have to balance them all, glasses half filled with liquid and half filled bottles and all balanced on one tray. Approached a table of nine business men on my first week working there with their order; lost control of the tray!!!:eek::eek::eek:

The tray was weaving around like a saucer on a stick and bottles and glasses flew all over the place. I only made things worse by trying to catch them, thus giving even more momentum as I drenched every one of them, all suited and booted. One guy actually was smacked over the head with a bottle.

The manager told me to go back to the kitchen, gave them all a free meal, asked them to send in any dry cleaning bills and when he spoke to me later pissed himself laughing.

I nearly died of embarrassment!

truecrippler

DubArk wrote: »

As a younger person I worked in a restaurant as a waiter. The policy with drinks such as bottled water, beer etc was that we half pour them, so we would have to balance them all, glasses half filled with liquid and half filled bottles and all balanced on one tray. Approached a table of nine business men on my first week working there with their order; lost control of the tray!!!:eek::eek::eek:

The tray was weaving around like a saucer on a stick and bottles and glasses flew all over the place. I only made things worse by trying to catch them, thus giving even more momentum as I drenched every one of them, all suited and booted. One guy actually was smacked over the head with a bottle.

The manager told me to go back to the kitchen, gave them all a free meal, asked them to send in any dry cleaning bills and when he spoke to me later pissed himself laughing.

I nearly died of embarrassment!

Aww man, what a cool manager.

Do McDonalds stories count? :P

DubArk

truecrippler wrote: »

Aww man, what a cool manager.

Do McDonalds stories count? :P

He was very cool.:)

Im sure no one will object to a McDonalds story!!

Archeron

While having a good old fashioned Irish brekky at a cafe with long cafeteria style tables, I was trying to cut through a particularly resilient rasher on a piece of toast. It came apart unexpectedly causing the fork with toast attached to go sliding at speed and push about a third of the contents of my plate (including most of the beans) onto the open newspaper of the dude sitting in front of me.
He saw the funny side (as none of it got on him I suppose) and I went without breakfast.

Krsnik87

When I was a kid there used to be open flame candles on the tables in a resteraunt we always used to go to. I was a little bollox always slighly lighting up the napkins and putting them out.

But one day I picked up the napkin as usual, put it to the flame and woosh; the whole thing disintigrated in a second. I ended up buring myself, dropping the napkin onto the table cloth which went up too. Everyone at the table jumped up and the table fell over setting the carpet up.

Sat there in disbelief as my da and a few others frantically tried to stamp out the flames till one of the waiters ran up with a fire extinguisher. Needless to say the resteraunt had to redecorate the section.

Not one of my proudest moments but it was fookin hilarious

Kold

My order has been forgotten several times before which is embarassing because it shows how I fear confrontation so much as to wait for an hour before asking where the sh*t my food is and then meekly suggest that I shouldn't have to pay.

adsgirl

The Master wrote: »

What did the hot blonde do? collapse with laughter
Did other diners notice? yes , they couldnt help but notice
Are you barred? for life
Did you get therapy later? yes but it didnt work

Hope you don't mind, I told a friend this story, lol...... she choked and spat her coffee out, then wet laughing, so I guess it was a double whammy:D

Seachmall

Dinter wrote: »

On a date in a fairly crowded restaurant I was dying to use the toilet. Of course I hardly wanted to say that so tried to slip away nonchalantly.

I leaned over and freshened the wine then stood up, placed my napkin on the seat, perhaps murmured a bon mot followed by an "excuse me for a moment", turned around, tripped on my neighbours handbag that she'd thoughtfuly placed beside me, felt myself falling, time slowed, crashed into neighbours table knocking dinner and drinks flying.

Jeez possibly the most embarrassing thing ever as everyone in the restaurant laughed thinking I was drunk except for the couple whose dinner I ruined who did not see the funny side. Even now I blush when I remember standing there, half covered in food debris, looking at my date amidst gales of laughter. So tempted to just turn around and walk out.

You should have just casually sat back down, poured yourself a glass of wine and continued on with the night as if nothing had happened.

I went to a chinese resteraunt with my family once and we were all pure giddy, laughing at anything and everything. When the waitress came over I suddenly had a fit of laughter for no reason, I used the menu to try and cover my face but everyone at the table could see me and began laughing hysterically too. The waitress thought we were laughing at her and it only got worse when it came time for me to order my food. I wanted to say 'Chicken Won Ton' but because I was trying not to laugh it came out in a racist-chinese accent which meant everyone(except the waitress who seemed quite pissed) started laughing harder. It took me 15 minutes to order I was lauging so hard and every single word I spoke came out in a racist-chinese accent. I can only imagine what the waitress did to our food. Every time we're at a resteraunt now and I order Chicken Won Tons everyone breaks down laughing.

The Master

adsgirl wrote: »

Hope you don't mind, I told a friend this story, lol...... she choked and spat her coffee out, then wet laughing, so I guess it was a double whammy:D

Good to know I'm making people happy:D

truecrippler

Krsnik87 wrote: »

When I was a kid there used to be open flame candles on the tables in a resteraunt we always used to go to. I was a little bollox always slighly lighting up the napkins and putting them out.

But one day I picked up the napkin as usual, put it to the flame and woosh; the whole thing disintigrated in a second. I ended up buring myself, dropping the napkin onto the table cloth which went up too. Everyone at the table jumped up and the table fell over setting the carpet up.

Sat there in disbelief as my da and a few others frantically tried to stamp out the flames till one of the waiters ran up with a fire extinguisher. Needless to say the resteraunt had to redecorate the section.

Not one of my proudest moments but it was fookin hilarious

You sure that actually happened? Seems a bit far fetched :P.

Pics or GTFO!!!

Krsnik87

The pics are in the post on the way out to ya buddy :rollseyes:

flangeman

Working in a bar as a 'Lounge Boy' (sounds mucky now) I had a pint of Guinness on a tray trying to get past a few people. One moved back, pint came off and landed upside down on top of thi guy sitting on a stool. It ended up like he was wearing it like a hat, dripping from the point all over him. The whole pub nearly in fits at him.

Poor fecker just stared at me, got up and left.

Is Guinness a pretty bad stain to get out?

Honey-ec

Captain Ginger wrote: »

Was trying to show off to the girlfriend how much I knew about wine and made a joke about how bad Merlot is, ordered the wine and then low and behold after saying how nice it was it turned out to be a Merlot and I had not noticed. I was a plank.

Someone had been watching too much "Sideways"...

Krsnik87

^ Fooks up your clothes, dropped a few (9) pints on one guy back in my bar days. Got sent a bill lol... I told him not to pick up a pint while it was balancing but they never listen!

Fratton Fred

One of my mates older brothers is a bit of a bank worker type geek. he is as mild as anything and won't say boo to a goose...until he has had a beer.

Once pissed Bob turns into hitlers love child, spouting racist **** all over the place.

Anyway, we had a night out in an Indian restaurent in Windsor and Bob started on teh waiter. we aplogised as much as we could and the waiter seems pretty ok with us, but you could see they all wanted to kill Bob.

Anyway, we leave and manage to get the god****e home, only for him to realise that he had left his jacket in the curry house.

Bob heads back the next day to pick it up, and eats the largest slice of humble pie you could imagine. Apologising like crazy for being a **** etc. The waiter looks at him and says, "Don't worry, we all pissed in your curry" which gets a rye smile and a laugh from Bob. the waiter stays stern faced and says that no, he is not joking, he, the other waiters, and the two chefs all pissed in his dinner, his beer, in fact pretty much everything he ate and drank in their restaurant.

Bob's never been back there for some reason:D

antodeco

I always remember the time someone farted in a restaraunt, and this thing smelt of sewage. It literally hung there. There were people at surrounding tables sniffing the air and calling the waiter over. He started sniffing at it too and then the manager came over. He apologised to us and the surrounding tables and couldnt figure out where the smell came from. I was literally choking on my food trying not to laugh as several people got full lungs of a sewage style fart. It mustve stayed there for a good 15 minutes, but you could see people walking into like a wall and then wondering where it was coming from!!

giftgrub

Didnt happen to me but i was embarrassed for them...

A few years back i was in a chinese in Dublin when these two lads came in

they were quite obviously "up for the Match" what with the county colours and all

Anyway when their mains came out the waiter got the dishes mixed up and one lad's food in front of the other

Instead of just swapping plates they stood up and swapped chairs

brilliant