Love life

LegacyUser

I'm at a crossroads in my love life at the moment. It's a case of chasing an ex or pursuing someone new.

The ex: Long story. We've been on and off for about three and a half years. She was my first love and vice versa. She was the first girl I slept with and vice versa again. She's also been my best friend for about six years.

We haven't been a couple for over two years now but we still have sex a lot. However, I had a girlfriend a while ago and the sex between me and my ex stopped. Once that relationship ended, I started sleeping with my ex again.

In the last few months, she's started off with another guy. As it's got more serious between them, my feelings for her have returned and I told her about it. She told me we were over and that she was happy with her new boyfriend. Then she cheated on him with me, twice. The first time she said it was a mistake and that I shouldn't have tempted her.

The second time, she rang me up when she was out one night and asked could she come over to mine. Once she came over, she told me that she still loved me and she always had and would. I told her the same and we had sex that night. The next morning it was like we were a couple again and we had sex again. Again, we told each other we loved each other.

A few days later we had a silly fight over nothing and she said we wouldn't be getting back together. She told me that she was still with her boyfriend and that she had no feelings for me. She said she had a fight with her boyfriend that night. She had been "upset" and "angry" and that's why she turned to me.

Now, about four weeks later, she's stopped talking to me. She text me the other night asking me not to tell her boyfriend that she'd cheated on him with me. I don't know him so I don't know why she said it. I told her that I still loved her and she told me to stop saying it. She said she didn't have feelings for me anymore, but I know that's a lie. I know her too well. Anyway, she hasn't talked to me since then.

New girl: So the other night, I was pretty depressed and went out with my friends and ended up with a new girl. She's a friend of a friend and I have fancied her since I first saw her so I was happy with what happened.

Now, I don't know what to do. My ex still has feelings for me, despite what she says. Trust me, I know her better than she knows herself. And I can't get her off my mind.

The new girl could be fun but I don't want to get into a new relationship when I'm in love with someone else.

Any advice would be very much appreciated.

Thanks for your attention.

Liam Byrne

As it's got more serious between them, my feelings for her have returned and I told her about it

So let me get this straight ? When YOU started seeing someone else, she didn't get in the way, but when SHE did, you decided to get in the way ?

Completely unfair, in my book.

Tragedy

You may know your ex better than she knows herself, but you cant live her life and make her decisions for her. Move on.

LegacyUser

So let me get this straight ? When YOU started seeing someone else, she didn't get in the way, but when SHE did, you decided to get in the way ?

Completely unfair, in my book.

No, she did get in the way. She quite often tried to get in between me and my girlfriend at the time. One example, she said she knew something about my gf but she wouldn't tell me what it was. She just kept saying that I wouldn't be with her if I knew what it was.

The difference, imo, is that when I was with someone else I didn't give her any false hope by sleeping with her or telling her that I felt anything more than friendship for her. When she was with someone else she has done that: She's cheated on him twice with me and she told me that she loved me.

LegacyUser

leave the new girl alone,she will end up getting hurt. Sit down with ur ex and tell her exactly how u feel and what u want to do about ye bn back together and if ur ex wont admit her feeling then leave her off,in the end she is missing out.

sryk

Simple, don't mess it up with the new girl, if you love your ex then go ahead but there till be at iem if you try and mess with both at the same time you will be the one to get trapped. So tell your exp about this new girl and see her reaction and then tell her what you think of all of this, if nothing then piss off with your ex if she still loves you she will be back.

togster

My eyes......

OP grow the hell up and let her move on. You need to do the same. Something tells me you are in for a long road of grief though.....