Best Man Sppech, What do you think?

leglessfool

Hi all i have a best man speech for me Brother Next month and i was just wondering could you take a quick look through my speech, names and places have been edited,

Thanks for any help/Comments in advance

• Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen - Let me first say that on behalf of the the bridesmaids q, w and e I’d like to thank a for his kind words and they do look absolutely smashing today, and only rightly outshone by our bride, b. And, I'm sure that the men in the room will agree with me, today is a sad day for single men, as another beauty leaves the available list. And ladies, I'm sure you'll agree that today's passing by without so much as a ripple.

• For those of you who don't know me, I'm K, A’s younger brother. It's great to be stood up here today because not just for the honour of toasting the happy couple it is mainly that after 26 years, A has finally admitted that I am the best man.

• I am going to try to keep this speech short because I’m afraid that I was told yesterday I might be getting a sore throat, its not that I feel ill its just both B and my mother have pointed out that if I say too much they’ll ring my neck.

• I’ll start off by saying I think I speak for everyone here when I say that the church was absolutely gorgeous this afternoon and I would like to thank everyone involved for producing such an great setting. And farther x, too who was marvellous.

• I also can’t imagine a happier way to start married life than in this wonderful venue with all their family and friends around them, when you are lucky enough to have such a lovely day, great service and reception you cant help but love weddings

• In fact, One of the great things about weddings is that often you run into people you haven't met before! Because of the wedding you met A's groomsman T, an old friend and a real gentleman i advise that during the night you should have a drink with all three of them.

• Moving Along, Now as I mentioned, it is a great honor to be Best Man, but with the role comes the job of writing this speech, and for those of you who do know me will know I wanted to make the process as easy as possible. So where do you begin for ideas? The obvious place seemed to be the Internet, I began searching the web.

After a couple of hours searching I found some REALLY good stuff on the net, but ....then I remembered I was supposed to be looking for Best Man tips not looking at nice tanned ti… I’ve just become aware that my grandmother is in the room so it would be best if i get rid of anything smutty, (Look Through Speech) (Drop All of pages)

• I’m going to add that as A younger brother my sense of humour will have developed from watching him as i was growing up so if this is boring you so far ant is to blame.
• I guess now I should tell J and C what their new son in law is really like, At is Smart… Caring…Funny…Loyal… Careffff... Hefffuu… (Show too A) Oh Helpful Your writing is awful well you get the idea he’s a good lad
• But it would it’s easy for me to stand here and take cheep shots at him – and it’s also rather fun. But if the truth be told, I was always very proud that he was my big brother.
• however It will surprise you and especially Ma to know that we didn’t always get along, in fact I remember one time we had an argument we were playing and he called me fat and I called him lanky and we both went home crying! He did email at work me the next day to apologise so it didn’t last too long.

But it wasn’t always that way, In fact as I’ve been growing up he really was more of a third parent I mean he’d tell you he’s seen me drink from a bottle crawl around the floor take some wobbly steps naked around the room and looked after me when I was getting sick, and that was just last night

• Most of you will know that I have been lucky enough to know b for many years and I honestly believe that she deserves a man that can help around the house, keep it tidy, perform DIY, never come home drunk, dependable and handsome. A, you are an extremely lucky man to have married b before she found him, but I’m delighted that you did. And B, it is a wonderful pleasure to welcome you and young Johnny into our family today.

• I know it’s tradition to attack the groom with some embarrassing stories of marathon sessions in the pub, run in’s with the law and tales of childhood, as i sat down eventually I could think of some great stories but as I went through them I slowly realised more often than not it was my idea so i thought to protect my own perfect reputation i said i would move onto the toats..... at least that is what i was going to say until A's stag a few weeks ago

• as we started the night with 25 men I remember saying to my Dad that if we came back with over half we’d be doing well, as it happened we came back with 19 with A going to hospital after doing a summersault in the bus on the way home, this happened in the middle of Cork however under ants guidance we decided to drive back home to just outside Youghal and phone an ambulance to wait for another hour and bring him back into A&E,

• I remember myself x y z and v who had also ended up in hospital with a head injury trying the same move all got very upset and had a bit of a weep when we saw him brought him into A&E, the reason because we heard that B had made us sausages and rashers and we knew the rest of them would have it eaten by the time he was finished, but it all turned out good in the end A didn’t break his Backside as was originally feared I still maintain that he did it on purpose because he knew that if B had seem the state of him she would have kicked him in that area alot there allot harder.

• Huhhh, anyway after a couple of hours I found some something on the internet that I could use in my speech..........[/FONT]
  • Always Let Her think That she is getting her own way then let her have it
  • Always say the three little words everyday..."You're right hunny”
  • The best way to remember your anniversary is to forget it once.

• Now I’m delighted to say we are coming to an end.... None of you will know this, but I've actually congratulated the groom already. 'A,' I said to him, 'Well done! You will always look back on this as the happiest and best thing you've ever done.' Fitting words, I thought, at the end of out trip to Las Vegas.

• So with that in mind I’m going to perform a different toast, Ladies and gentlemen could you please raise your glasses, to A and B may the best moments of your past be the worst of your future! Cheers.

biko

It's nice but what's with the font? It screws everything up.

leglessfool

biko wrote: »

It's nice but what's with the font? It screws everything up.

Ya sorry thats my fault i worte it up im MS word 2007 and just copy and pasted it i'll try and edit it so it looks abit better. cheers for the comment

biko

Much better now but not sure about the "(Drop All of pages)". If not delivered flawlessly it's not really funny imo.

leglessfool

biko wrote: »

Much better now but not sure about the "(Drop All of pages)". If not delivered flawlessly it's not really funny imo.

Ya TBH i was thinking of cutting that whole internet joke for the reason you said,

daiixi

I lost interest after the third paragraph. Search other threads. Think short and sweet. You're probably not naturally amazingly funny and people don't really want to listen to you (or anyone) for that long.

I don't mean to be rude by the above, but really, everyone always wants the speeches to be over five minutes ago.