How do u know what a guy expects?

LegacyUser

ok, so weird thread here....

I've always been a bit self-concious about my body, used to be a bit fat, but lost the weight but i still would be very self concious when i'm naked etc.

I was in a serious relationship for 2.5 years and was comfortable mostly with that guy but now we've broken up and the thoughts of having to bare all infront of another bloke is terrifying. I know i'm not over weight, though I am a bit curvy....I'm a size 8 or 10 with 34dd boobs, which would be fine but occasionally i feel a bit flabby, not loads but if i sit down i get a spare tyre....i go to the gym 3 times a week but i will just never look like the girls in the magazines......my ex boyfrend never told me i looked good or bad, and i was just afraid to ask.

Is it a real turn off for guys if a girl looks really nice with her clothes on and has a bit of flab when she takes them off?

Thanks x

RedXIV

ok, one of my mates, ridiculously fit, doesn't have a 6-pack, oh no, 10 pack at least. and when he sits down, it looks like a layer of fat. that happens to everyone when they sit down. I look pregnant

You sound like you have a great figure, and believe me, any guy who you are willing to show it to is going to be ( in no order)

1) grateful
2) awed
3) "excited"

Don't worry about it OP

All the best
Red

Victor

To be perfectly honest, most guys will be "Whoot! She's nekkid! She's nekkid and she's here with me!". Being close and / or naked with someone can create a great bond. It says "I trust you".

People come in all sorts of different shapes and sizes - have a look at some of the Spencer Tunick threads. Now, some people will have hang-ups or preferences, big, small, blonde, brunette, 3-fingers or 4, but one person's hang-up is another person's kink.

One man's spare tyre is another man's bouncy castle.

SnowMonkey

your in great shape you have no reason what so ever to fret.....

MagicMarker

Hey OP, size 8-10 with 34dd's sounds pretty friggin awesome to me!! Us men like a bit of meat on the bones, i find someone with a bit of a tummy sexy so long as their in proportion, and you don't seem to have an issue with that!

BraziliaNZ

men will hump pretty much anything I wouldn't worry about it tbh

Overheal

if you're with someone who is going to give you abunch of crap about how you look - trust me: there are others out here.

The_Conductor

Size 8-10 with 34dd boobs? You'll have a queue of appreciative males following you where-ever you go. While its entirely normal to be self conscious about our body shapes and sizes- you would make any red-blooded guy drool- and any honest girl green with envy. Well done girl!

CathyMoran

smccarrick wrote: »

Size 8-10 with 34dd boobs? You'll have a queue of appreciative males following you where-ever you go. While its entirely normal to be self conscious about our body shapes and sizes- you would make any red-blooded guy drool- and any honest girl green with envy. Well done girl!

Hands off boy! I am actually the same size as you and I have not had any problems...just feel confident in your body and you will be fine.

LegacyUser

Thanks to everyone who replied, it really is nice to get that reassurance. I suppose what i'm saying though is that i know size 8-10 with 34dd boobs looks great when i'm dressed but when i get intimate i'd be afraid the guys were expecting something really great and be disppointed.

Again, I'm really inexperienced and have only really been that way with my ex.

Thanks again, your replies are all lovely

hussey

Guys have roughly an idea how big you are before you sleep with them.
Anyone might have an unexpected bump/flab somewhere, and most people don't mind at all.
Most people have issues with their bodies, so I wouldn't be worried really

LegacyUser

Amiflabby wrote: »

ok, so weird thread here....

I've always been a bit self-concious about my body, used to be a bit fat, but lost the weight but i still would be very self concious when i'm naked etc.

I was in a serious relationship for 2.5 years and was comfortable mostly with that guy but now we've broken up and the thoughts of having to bare all infront of another bloke is terrifying. I know i'm not over weight, though I am a bit curvy....I'm a size 8 or 10 with 34dd boobs, which would be fine but occasionally i feel a bit flabby, not loads but if i sit down i get a spare tyre....i go to the gym 3 times a week but i will just never look like the girls in the magazines......my ex boyfrend never told me i looked good or bad, and i was just afraid to ask.

Is it a real turn off for guys if a girl looks really nice with her clothes on and has a bit of flab when she takes them off?

Thanks x

what your forgetting is that any bloke you are with is probably no brad pitt i.e. very few people look like models in magazines- most have been airbrushed and all have the benefit of proffesional photographers and good lighting!

TBH once the clothes are of most blokes have a one track mind anyway!

LadyE

OP, I totally understand where your coming from...I haven’t got your figure tho …damn you!:D:D:D I think it’s a psychological thing, when you loose lots of weight you always see yourself as the fat person you were before....It’s a really hard mentality to get out of and gives you a negative perception of what you actually look like.

You don’t need everyone here to tell yourself how much of great figure you’ve got, you need to tell yourself! And believe it

MJOR

How fab are you? Guys will love it...

_blank_

Er, Victor already said it.

You get in the nip for a guy, he won't even be thinking about the things you are thinking he will.

Sugar Drunk

MagicMarker wrote: »

Hey OP, size 8-10 with 34dd's sounds pretty friggin awesome to me!!

yup im a size 8 and would kill for those boobs!! at a size 8-10 theres no way you have flab OP! we all have a few soft bits - its natural! I have a natural crease on my tummy so when i sit down It goes into 'rolls' but guess what my BF loves it.
I think your going through the understandable post break up confidence dip. A decent guy will be so thrilled you want to be with him he wont be lookign for flaws!

BubbleWrap85

Feckin hell, a size 8/10 girl with 34DD boobs is feeling self conscious? Feckin hell, dunno what I should be feeling so! Everyone has issues with themselves. It just amazes me because to me I would kill to have their body yet they're self conscious about it. Trust me, nobody could ever have an issue with any "flab" you think you have! Be confident

SarahSassy

TBH, all of society knows that size 8-10 is teeny and you seem to have some issues with your body image and as such I would genuinely recommend you visit a counsellor... I dont say that lightly but your post sounds very left of centre given your proportions. You mention you lost weight and you may just need some help with gaining confidence and a healthy body image.

Wurly

Amiflabby wrote: »

i will just never look like the girls in the magazines......

Of course you won't, neither will I. Due to the fact that I don't have an airbrushing machine at my disposal. Comparing yourself to girls in magazines is dangerous. The media has a lot to answer for. grrrr

my ex boyfrend never told me i looked good or bad, and i was just afraid to ask.

What about what you think??

Is it a real turn off for guys if a girl looks really nice with her clothes on and has a bit of flab when she takes them off?

Most people have a bit of flab. So bloody what? Once you're healthy, it doesnt matter. This looks thing is all an illusion. The more secure and confident someone is with their appearance, the more attractive they are - fact! People of all shapes and sizes can be attractive. You don't need to have a six pack to be good looking.

If it makes you feel better, then start doing sit ups or join a gym. But this confidence has to come from you rather than an external source. If you rely on others to prop up your confidence, then you're in big trouble. People can therefore make you feel bad about yourself just as quick. It is really what you think of yourself that matters. We are all beautiful in our own way. Fact the 2nd.:D

xx

Talliesin

Amiflabby wrote: »

size 8 or 10 with 34dd boobs

To be perfectly honest I'd probably prefer someone bigger than that, though I've also dated women smaller. Sexiness can't me measured with a tape-measure.