Is this overreacting?!

barbeck23

ok, short of it - gf abroad,didnt think it would last but it did,were crazy about each other...only thing is,i get so jealous and worried she's going to stop loving me.i rang her everyday last week,she was very receptive,and then rang her early sunday morning to get a text saying - ur really stressed, im not going anywhere so chill out.

Now I am pissed off at her arrogance. Am I overreacting?!? Ill be seeing her friday and I really want to be in gr8 form seeing her.we've had loads of ups and downs since she went away 8 months ago and now things are really going well...
AHHHH why am I so needy!!!!!! Help me chill out!!!!!!!!:(:(:(:(

davyjose

First off it's un fair to call her arrogant for telling you to chill out about something you most definitely need to chill out about.
look, if long distance is to work, then you need to be able to trust her. If not, then you're just gonna torture yourself and eventually push her away. If you want to reassure yourself, just ask yourself why she would be in a relationship with you all that way away, if she wanted to get it somewhere closer. You're safe. But the neediness thing - it's not really fair on her.

sunnyside

I'd say you were annoying her calling her all the time while she was on holidays. When you are on holidays the daily routine is different and you don't need to be hearing what's going on at home all the time. Bring her out for dinner when she gets back.

Wibbs

Yep you're over reacting and you will appear needy. This is way more likely to make her think differently about you as a couple. The surest way in this case. So chill out or run the risk of losing her.

Cool_CM

I'd say you are over-reacting. Give her some space at least, especially if you'll be seeing her that soon, as she says she's not going to be going anywhere, especially if you've already lasted 8 months apart already. Chill out, wait a few days and then you'll see her and you'll be grand.

akamossy

Most definately over-reacting. You were probably just annoying her ringing her all the time! I'm sure she misses you but probably doesn't feel the need to talk all the time. I do not think she's being arrogant and you really should just forget it and enjoy the time you have with her on friday.

barbeck23

Thanks guys,
yeah i know i need to chill,she's very good with me i know that,i think im just worried this week more so because her ex and best friend is over satying with her and it drives me mad (we were on a break b4 and she kissed the ex)
I dont know where this insecurity comes from and why i cant just relax.

akamossy

You said it yourself you were on a break when that happened so it really should be left in the past and you should not let it effect you. If she had wanted to leave you she would have just done it. Shes told you shes not going anywhere, so you should accept it, trust her, be happy and enjoy the next time you see her. And do not mention what she said to you as if you do you could be heading for a fight and it will ruin your time with her.

Frisbee

Yeah give her some space man.
I know I hate my girlfriend texting me everyday If I'm away.
She's gone away for three months over the summer now. Just a couple e-mail's back and forth a week and maybe one phone call.
She went away to enjoy herself, not have me constantly annoying her.
So just chill out a lil bit...

barbeck23

Thats the last thing i want.the last 8 months without her have been incredibly hard and for some reason she doesnt feel the need to be in contact all the time and i sometimes take t really personally.i dont know why,i know she loves me and see's a life together.we've been through alot,we're both women(hence the high drama!)and there have been issues about that also.
i just miss her.she sent me a mail this morning saying hello to me,damn this **** is hard! Love makes you CRAZY!

MissHoneyBun

Hang on a minute here, if you're going out with someone a few minutes chat on the phone to them should not be a chore! The OP has obviously trusted this girl enough to maintain a relationship with her whilst she kicks off abroad living it up -which she is fully entitled to of course. However, it wouldnt kill for her to think of someone she is supposed to be and presumably is in love with who is at home doing far less exciting things than she and who would like to share a few minutes hearing about each other's day. Fair enough some people need much more space in relationships than others but she's in another country for heaven's sake -any more space and she'd be single! Perhaps cut it back to every second/third day OP, if she still feels crowded then maybe she's not worth investing the time in. Talking is all this relationship exists on at the moment, no talking=no relationship