Dead End

LegacyUser

Right,Suppose I jus need to get this off my chest. I'm in a job I hate that I have to stay in for the next 3 months. I have nothing to do all day, nobody my own age in the building so I sit in silence for roughly 35 hours a week! After work my friends are pretty busy so I sit at home until I go back to work the next day.

the only social thing that my friends do is drink so I have nothing really going on in my life. Love life is non existent for about a yr got hurt by the 1st love and where as I was always quite nice to people I've changed and I think it's a defense against getting hurt bt it's hard to fight

Again today for the last hour in work and on the bus I found myself close to tears as I realised that this is it for me for the foreseeable future. Lately I've been thinking about just emptying my account and leaving Ireland but I know this is ridiculous for a 22 yr old to jus run away but it's all I've come up with so far.

Any advice or input from anybody who thinks they know what I should do is appreciated and thanks for reading

Rowley Birkin QC

Is this a summer job you are talking about? I only ask because of the 3 months comment. If it is don't stress too much we have all been there, as good an excuse to concentrate on work as any.

Have you any hobbies or interests? Member of any clubs or socs? Worth a look through the socs or sports tab on boards for active Irish organisations.

Whatever happens chin up and best of luck.

DenMan

Hi OP

Just saw your post there. Sorry to hear about your predicament. From my own experience I know what it is like to feel the way you are feeling right now. Okay first thing is that you will be leaving your job in a few months, that's a good thing. Obviously you are not happy there and you want to do something better with your life. That's a plus. What do you like doing, outside of work? Any hobbies or interests? Would you like a career change?

I would register here on boards.ie first. It is a great way to get things off your chest and talk to people who have been and/or are currently are in your situation. Maybe over the next 3 months of your job think of all the things you would like to do once you are finally out of it? Have you got a good education?, are you planning on improving it?, do you listen to your dreams? Are they telling you something in the back of your mind?

Hope I helped in some way. Your inner voice is telling you something.

LegacyUser

Not quite a summer job it's part of my college course and I'm 3 months into the 6 month placement. I'm 3 years into a 4 yr degree that I'm not really into and for the 2nd year running I'm facing repeat exams.
Hobby was football up until last season when I gave it up hopefully go back in August if anything just to get out of the house
I suppose I have dreams that I want to follow but I know it's practical to stay in college and get my degree partiularly with the economy now so I suppose ambition is on hold until 2009


Thanks for reading

LegacyUser

hi... sorry to hear your a bit upset at the min... i am a strong believer in not doing anything that i dont want to do-and as the previous poster said it is important to listen to your own needs... why do you have to do this job?

this might not be for you but its really popular right now for manifesting your dreams its -'the secret' and i have found it amazing...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_b1GKGWJbE8
you can start off with the simplist of things...it is a way of attracting your dreams to you by being in the right head space,its not for everyone but if your looking for some inspiration its great..

i really hear you say that you dont want to work in this job another day... is there anyway you can change this situation so you can enjoy the rest of the summer-once you make a better picture in your head of how you would like your summer to be you could follow that instead...

Gina Brel

How about doing an evening class/going swimming/learning something new etc.
Try and see what's good about your life right now.Can understand how you're feeling,have had my fair share of mind numbing jobs e.g.cleaning speculums in an S.T.D. clinic(and that wasnt even the worse).The sunscreen song by Baz Luhrman is my prescription for you.All the best Dr Brel

RedXIV

don't know wrote: »

Right,Suppose I jus need to get this off my chest. I'm in a job I hate that I have to stay in for the next 3 months. I have nothing to do all day, nobody my own age in the building so I sit in silence for roughly 35 hours a week! After work my friends are pretty busy so I sit at home until I go back to work the next day.

Ok mate, lets tackle this one step at a time and first things first is to get rid of the idea that people need to be your age to have a bit of craic with. Surely someone in the building is a bit of fun, even if they are ten years your senior? physical age and mental age are not the same thing.

Next, sitting at home is definitely not a good plan. you sound like you have an office job which i assume ends around 5 or 6? this means there are COUNTLESS things you could be doing instead of sitting at home. Join a club or a gym etc? get night classes. do something that involves interaction! And i can type in caps lock all i want but you are the one that has to do it!

don't know wrote: »

the only social thing that my friends do is drink so I have nothing really going on in my life. Love life is non existent for about a yr got hurt by the 1st love and where as I was always quite nice to people I've changed and I think it's a defense against getting hurt bt it's hard to fight.

Ok, well if you have guys you can drink with, surely ye can do something else together? and even if you can't suggest something like a weekend away in the coming weeks for something to look forward to. Also, if you're going to retreat into a shell after your first love, don't expect the second one to just waltz into your life. You can go for the stoic option and to a degree it will stop you from feeling anguish and pain BUT it'll also stop you feeling joy and love. that for me isn't a sacrifice worth making.

don't know wrote: »

Again today for the last hour in work and on the bus I found myself close to tears as I realised that this is it for me for the foreseeable future. Lately I've been thinking about just emptying my account and leaving Ireland but I know this is ridiculous for a 22 yr old to jus run away but it's all I've come up with so far.

Any advice or input from anybody who thinks they know what I should do is appreciated and thanks for reading

If you think running away is the option for you, take a year out and do it. Why not? your 22, you've your whole life ahead of you. college years can always be deferred and it's not like your paying a mortage or anything.

This problem is dependant on you for the solution. Unless your willing to go out there and make changes in your life, you ARE going to end up on this monotonous road to ruin. Scare ya? good, now go do something to change your life! First step is the hardest but once you take it, you'll wonder what the worry was about

All the best

Red

NextSteps

Can you make your job more interesting? Go to your supervisor, explain that you don't have much to do and would like to be learning more, and see what he/she has to say. What's to lose? Managers like to see initiative. Is there some improvement that could be made that you could suggest, fo example?

newestUser

Parts of the OPs post could have been written by me 10 years ago. (I did a 6 month placement in 3rd year of my undergrad degree in a company I didn't want to work in, in a town I didn't want to be, with people that weren't very nice, or I had nothing in common with!).

I've done the 'sitting in a room on your own all day with nothing to do' thing as well. It sucks.

The worst thing about my experience (and sorry for focussing on me instead of you) was where I was coming from. I'd had 2.5 mind-expanding years in college, grew a lot, learned a lot, and then found myself in a similar situation to you! And it scared me that the rest of my working life was going to be like that.

During my work placement, I developed a rather unhealthy attitude towards work, ie people just clock in/clock out in body, their hearts and minds are somewhere else, your colleagues are always going to be unfriendly/self-absorbed/boring, you'll never 'click' with anyone the way you did with friends you made in school or college because everything is really 'serious' now, etc. It wasn't a helpful attitude to have. It's not true for lots of workplaces, and if you're resigned to this vision of working life, you'll never pull your finger out of your @ss to find somewhere you like working, because you'll think everywhere is sh!t.

I know I'm focussing on my own story, and projecting my own past issues on to you, but you're at a stage where you're forming impressions and ideas about work, and I wouldn't like you to develop an unhelpful attitude to work as a result of this unpleasant experience.

You say you're not really interested in your course. That's another Personal Issue altogether, but I was a bit fed up with what I was doing after 3 or so years of it. I went on to study (and love) an MSc and a PhD in the subject, you have your ups and downs with any lengthy degree course.

There's a *lot* of issues in your post (relationships with friends/opposite sex, career path, travelling, etc) and each of them would need a thread of it's own, but as far as the work thing is concerned, all I can do is empathise, advise you not to get too down, there's lots of jobs and workplaces out there where you'll be unhappy, but there's many where you'll flourish and be content. This may have been your first exposure to proper-grown-up work (if you'll pardon the condescending turn of phrase), and it's unfortunate that it's been unpleasant, but it's not the end of the world, and you've only 3 months left.

Your first job out of college is a smack to the head for everyone, because the workplace (not student jobs, but jobs where people are older, have more responsibilities, etc) is so different from what you've known before. It's going to require some adjustment from you, but there are places you'll be happy to adjust to, just as surely as there are places you won't.