Post holiday/romance blues

LegacyUser

Anyone got any ideas on how to get over these?

Was on the holiday of a lifetime and had the best 2 weeks of my life and also fell for a beautiful girl and had the most fun ever with her.

Now its all over, im back in work at 8am, am going to have a pile of work on my table, have to sit on the M50 all morning etc and just cant face it. Before i went the 3months before my holiday it was the only thing that got me through was kowing the holiday was ahead, now ive nothing to look forward to :-(

Also the girl I met, have never met anyone like her, spent the best 2 weeks with her, we got on so well and couldnt stop laughing with each other, she was so sexy, my mates said they've never seen me so happy and compatable with somebody. But relaistically, she lives a far way away and I know i may see her again but we have no future.

i figure there will be a few of these threads popping up, anyone got any advice?

RedXIV

Ah but if you think about it, you have a mini project right in front of you in the shape of this amazing new woman. You're in the potentially interesting part of constructing a relationship, which always requires effort. Just because she lives far away doesn't mean you can't get to her. You have a car so plan a weekend away?

jellie

how far away is it?

I know i have a thread here about a crappy breakup, but we met on holidays 2 yrs ago & we made it work (until now anyway) across the country. yeah the breakup is sh*tty but i dont regret the relationship, it was amazing while we had it. the distance might have been part of the breakup but there was other issues too. some people DO make it work. if she makes you this happy it might be worth a shot

aye

well a friend of mine has been going out with her bf near 5 years now, and for the last four he's been going to college in america. so she's see him maybe twice in the college year, then he'd be in ireland for most of the summer.
they make it work, so i think you should go for it with this girl.

Wibbs

I agree with the others go for it. I know lots in long distance relationships that ahve made it work. BTW was it a proper holiday romance, not just laughing with her? I only mention it as I don't want you to end up in friendzone before you even start.

LegacyUser

Na it was a proper realtionship. Its not even a cross country thing, i live in Ireland and she lives in the backarse of northern Sweden, not really near an airport even.

Shes still studying and tbh i have no intention of going to live in North Sweden, so relaistically theres little chance as much as we tried to convince ourselves.

Ah am actaully fairly heartbroken, was with a girl for 3 years and we broke up last year and it wasnt even this bad. why couldnt she just be Irish!

togster

Dude you can fly to Göteborg with ryanair and get a train to anywhere from there. I went through a simlar thing to you and although it ended in tears 3 years later, it was worth it.

Wibbs

Im with the togster on this one.

biko

Evem thought I suspect he is Swedish I don't think togster really appreciate how far it is from Gothenburg to Northern Sweden We're talking about a 1000 kilometres (just less than 3 times the distance from Derry to Cork or so).

OP, did she give you an e-mail address or a telephone number? Is there any way you can stay in touch while she is still in school and then maybe she can visit you - or you both can see each other on hols again?
Facebook?

Sonderval

Consider also, that perhaps the 2 weeks with her was that good because it was limited.

If you go chasing her down, you may find that what you end up with bears no resemblance to that which you had previously experienced - it may diminish what you shared. Sometimes things happen, if only for a certain amount of time, that have exceptional resonance within ourselves.

A lifetime can be had in a moment, a meaningful relationship in a short time.

Just an alternate approach to the usual 'go get her tiger' posts.

m83

I don't know why more people don't take chances in life. The whole 9-5 is the biggest con of all time. Live the life that makes you happy. Sound to me like that's in Sweden. Life's too short man for the M50.

allabouteve

Sonderval wrote: »

Consider also, that perhaps the 2 weeks with her was that good because it was limited.

If you go chasing her down, you may find that what you end up with bears no resemblance to that which you had previously experienced - it may diminish what you shared. Sometimes things happen, if only for a certain amount of time, that have exceptional resonance within ourselves.

A lifetime can be had in a moment, a meaningful relationship in a short time.

Just an alternate approach to the usual 'go get her tiger' posts.

Or if you don't take the chance you could miss out on something special...it's hard to know, but your relationship developed in it's own little bubble that wasn't based in real life so just be careful.

LegacyUser

yep have her number, msn, skype etc, even arranged an O2 login for her for free webtext!

Lads when i mean the backarse of Sweden i mean the real back arse, up really far north!

Looks wise - perfection, personality - perfection, her accent - perfection. Ah im so crazy about her, we've just been texting all day. She has 2 years of uni left, ive got a good job that id be mad to leave for a girl i met for 2 weeks, even if she is the women of my dreams.

ill give it a bit longer and see how we feel, ah its so tough being away from her

Drift

On topic response: I know you've got the blues being back on the M50 looking at the dirt on the back of the white van in front but think of it this way: Would you rather come back home from holidays after having getting a dose of diarrohea and sitting on the bog for 3 weeks or come back home from holidays having had a great time with a fantastic girl. I've never had a holiday romance but I've no doubt it's a good memory rather than a bad one. The blues would be worse if you had no good memories from your holiday.

Wishy washy meandering tenously on topic response: I've been to the arsehole of northern Sweden. We were driving and during our long trip through the endless mosquito filled forests we passed through this mining town, the name of which escapes me completely. Anyway we pulled up at at petrol station to fill up the wagon and as we were there topping up over walks this guy from Dublin who recognised an Irish numberplate. We asked him what brought him to this dour looking town with the one big factory/mine in the middle of it - you guessed it, he met a girl from there and followed her home! Now I've no idea how he met her; but he did say that he never envisaged himself living up there. He was very happy with himself and how is life had turned out though.

So the moral of the story is just play it by ear Steve. Don't give up the job and sell the furniture yet. But one of the greatest things about life is that you don't know how it's going to turn out!

Inafix

Steve: Have you actually invited her to Ireland?

Ya never know she just might fall in love with the Emerald Isle

bronte

Dude, see how it goes, suss her out!
You could plan a trip over there, or she could come here!
This didn't happen for no reason!

jester77

What you got to lose? I've done the long distance thing and it worked.

Your obviously in a job you don't like with a crazy commute. IMO I think you would be foolish not to give it a try. North of Sweden is not that hard to get to, I've been as far north as you can get in Scandinavia and there are plenty of airports up there in Norway and Finland which would give you a quick commute into northern Sweden. I've even seen some river planes in some towns in Finland which could be an option.

Irishcrx

Hi mate,

Know how you feel with the 9-5 drag i'm bloody well sick of it myself, same thing everyday you sometimes feel trapped. My mate has fallen in love with a Spanish girl and he is moving over to spain next month, getting a new job, apartment. First I thought he was mad but i've never seen him happier, before he really seemed down and now he's got a new lease on life, gotta admit i'm almost jealous as I'm at the other end, recently broken up, single, 9-5 drag, his car got stolen the other night and wrecked, they even stole his roof and he just laughed it off...point being do what makes you happy and you will be.

Elessar

Be careful. Holiday romances are just that - holiday romances. Once the freedom and excitement of a new place/experiences with new people ware off, the "romance" can be a different story. What I'm saying is in the real world, things are a lot less glamorous.

It's a lot like the old addage "If you want to know me, come and live with me".

bennyblanco

If you feel that strongly about it you have to do something no?
I understand those posters who advise caution but come on!
If it was me I'd hate to wonder what if? and just let it go.
If nothing happens or it doesnt pan out well sure **** it,like R.P McMurphy at least you tried.
Besides I hear the weather Northern Sweden is perfect this time of year*:D
What have you got to lose?







*this statement has no basis in fact

LegacyUser

I know, its easy for everyone to say - just go what if blah blah, but i have to be responsable to!

Was on the phone to her earlier and that voice of hers - Oh God.

One thing i didnt mention is shes actually Russian, but just studying in Sweden for now, after she will have to go back to Russia. I hear Russian ladies make really good wives though :-)

As i said, im going to give it a month, if I still feel the same im going to go over and visit her for a week, if I feel the same still im going to pack it in and go, was sitting in work today asking myself whats the point of it all!

bennyblanco

Go with your gut man,it's always right.....
Good luck with it

Sonderval

Sounds like and adventure, either way

Best of luck!

togster

StevieMcC wrote: »

I know, its easy for everyone to say - just go what if blah blah, but i have to be responsable to!

Was on the phone to her earlier and that voice of hers - Oh God.

One thing i didnt mention is shes actually Russian, but just studying in Sweden for now, after she will have to go back to Russia. I hear Russian ladies make really good wives though :-)

As i said, im going to give it a month, if I still feel the same im going to go over and visit her for a week, if I feel the same still im going to pack it in and go, was sitting in work today asking myself whats the point of it all!

Is it Karlstad university? I know a girl there who regularly flys to Stockholf rom there..... PM me if you would like some details