Stuff you hate in movies.

Pigman II

I hate the way in historical movies they'll mention buying a a painting by some unknown artist. One person will scoff and ridicule the art. Of course every single time this happens the artwork will be revealed to be a classic by some future icon. We the knowing audience can scoff at the shortsightedness of the cynic and revel in the irony.

Unfortunately for me this "bit" just doesn't work and I can't see any scenario where it ever would work.

==

Example 1

Titanic (1997) by James Cameroon

Billy Zane : Those mud puddles were certainly a waste of money.

Winslet : You're wrong. They're fascinating. Like in a dream... there's truth without
logic. What's his name again... ?

Some dude : Picasso.

Billy Zane : He'll never amount to a thing, trust me!

Example 2

Bobby (2006) by Emilio Sheen

Martin Sheen : She bought a painting of a can of soup last month. I think it was Campbells Tomato.

Helen Hunt : It's by Warhol. Did you know he was shot yesterday?

Sheen : Probably by someone who sobered up and realised they'd paid a for a portrait of a can of soup.

===

Oh how we laughed!

Havel

i hate product placement that makes no attempt to be subtle.

like in Bad Boys 2, huge pepsi truck drives right across the screen.

L31mr0d

bad cgi (see I am legend)

Rabies

Blatant product placement gets me everytime. Subtle is ok, in your face isn't.

eamon234

when directors use the same actors for every film - Tin Burton take note!

The Artist

In the saw films as sawV is in production "let the games begin" when does it END?

bnt

The amazing vanishing spectacles:
- when a wimp becomes a warrior, he can fight battles without being able to see properly. Examples: Harry Potter, Indiana Jones, Guy Pearce in LA Confidential.
- when the good little ugly duckling blossoms in to a beautiful, exciting woman , her eyesight also improves magically. Examples: Flatliners, Strictly Ballroom, many more.

:cool:

Cianos

It really pissed me off the way in Juno she was carrying around that litre of sunny delight for the first 5 minutes of the film.

Come on...at least let the film start before you start lashing the products in

Wacker

eamon234 wrote: »

when directors use the same actors for every film - Tin Burton take note!

Unusual complaint. Scorsese and De Niro have done (I think) eight films together, many of which are regarded as some of the best films of the latter half of the 20th century. I'm not saying I strongly disagree with you or anything, I'm just curious as to why it bothers you that Tim Burton always uses Johnny Depp (that was who you were talking about, right?). I personally think that it is only a good thing if a director has a great working relationship with a particular actor.

Driver 8

Jude Law *nod*

Fysh

Implausible "shock" scenes in horror/thriller movies that are out of place, such as the "stealth bus" as seen in The Orphanage or Final Destination (particularly as seen in the latter, where the stealth bus in question apparently originates from a road that 30 seconds ago has been shown to be blocked off!).

Scenes in which characters ignore a simple and logical solution to a given problem for the purpose of creating "tension", or where a situation is implausibly extended for that reason. (Eg in When A Stranger Calls where the police take over an hour of film time to discover that *gasp* the killer was calling from within the house!)

L31mr0d

Cianos wrote: »

It really pissed me off the way in Juno she was carrying around that litre of sunny delight for the first 5 minutes of the film.

Come on...at least let the film start before you start lashing the products in

it actually really annoys me when people get annoyed with ANY real world products being used in movies. Juno was drinking so much sunnyd so she could take multiple pregnancy tests. What would of been ok for her to be drinking? Water? What 16 y/o when given the choice is going to drink water?

Also a lot of kids in the US drink sunnyd. Would you complain about an Irish movie where the guy is drinking a guinness?

cashback

Crap gunmen shooting the ground behind their escaping prey...

Sentimental moments in gross out comedies etc.

Extreme quirkiness. Wes Anderson can be guilty sometimes.

eamon234

Wacker wrote: »

Unusual complaint. Scorsese and De Niro have done (I think) eight films together, many of which are regarded as some of the best films of the latter half of the 20th century. I'm not saying I strongly disagree with you or anything, I'm just curious as to why it bothers you that Tim Burton always uses Johnny Depp (that was who you were talking about, right?). I personally think that it is only a good thing if a director has a great working relationship with a particular actor.

Don't get me wrong, I'm a big Depp fan he's a great actor and certainly Burton has always casted him well and the films have always been good - I just think Burton's a very lazy director at times he's afraid to break out and cast someone different - Depp's not the only leading actor out there.

L31mr0d

the obligatory love interest in action movies. Why do they do it?

Basq

eamon234 wrote: »

when directors use the same actors for every film - Tin Burton take note!

Same with any Judd Apatow production.. they'll always have at least two or three of the following actors / actresses:

• Seth Rogen
• Jason Segal
• Jay Baruchel
• James Franco
• Leslie Mann
• Paul Rudd
• Jonah Hill

Doesn't bother me as his cast is always the strong-point of his films (along with the writing). One of the things I really enjoyed in 'Knocked Up' (as an Apatow fan) was all the friends of Ben used their real names for their characters: Jay Baruchel was Jay, Martin Starr was Martin etc.

Raiser

L31mr0d wrote: »

the obligatory love interest in action movies. Why do they do it?

Enemy at the gates really springs to mind for that one - utterly misplaced :rolleyes:

- I really hate any movie with plot explanations being hammered home for thick US audiences, followed by massive cuts in order to keep the whole thing down to 90 minutes at the expense of the character dev., original storyline etc. etc. Syrianna struck me as an example of a movie where the original intent was lost entirely somewhere between day 1, and by the looks of it, day 5 or 6 when they wrapped up

Duggy747

L31mr0d wrote:

the obligatory love interest in action movies. Why do they do it?

Took the words right out of my mouth. I bloody hate how the characters always have time for romance no matter how deadly the situation!! If I was being shot at or after witnessing tons of killings the last thing on my mind would be getting laid.

Dumbing down on movies for the US idiots.

Blatant product placement (One 80's Rob Lowe movie where some bar owner shows him a big Coca-Cola sign and asks "Where can I put this?"........pointless!)

Scenarios where people don't act or talk like humans. Take Transformers for example, the Australian girl tech-head expert whose 1st idea about the whole computer hacking is "synthetic DNA......blah blah...........something that is alive in the machines........blah blah.......*gurgle*" What sort of techie thinks that!?!

Action movies with characters jumping and shooting around with a "cool" face while some electronic metal soundtrack bangs away in the background...............how goddamn generic and lazy is that!?!

Vic Vinegar

People getting shot in movies that are wearing bullet proof vests, they always open their shirts/coats afterwards to reveal the vest to the audience...

L31mr0d

don't know if its really relevant as I don't go to see any of these movies on principle. But movies that involve some form of competition/sport. It seems Americans have this cookie cut formula for making sports movies and they just rehash it, whether it be race car driving, dancing, football, boxing... etc

The formula seems to always go something like: lead protagonist suffers blow and leaves the competition, years pass and he is called on to either a) compete again or b) train someone that is exactly like him to compete. A series of loses happen, then a sports montage happens for 10 minutes after which he is now a pro at the sport. He competes again but loses for the first 2/3rds of the game, but in the final third makes a miraculous come back and wins, cue slowmo with confetti and the protagonist getting the girl... the end.

Duggy747

L31mr0d wrote: »

don't know if its really relevant as I don't go to see any of these movies on principle. But movies that involve some form of competition/sport. It seems Americans have this cookie cut formula for making sports movies and they just rehash it, whether it be race car driving, dancing, football, boxing... etc

Don't forget it can't be a sports movie if it doesn't have Gary Glitter's Rock N' Roll (Part 2) in it. (Preferably with some ùber-American sports commentator pointing out how it's 43 degrees on this beautiful San Diego morning before informing us how serious the game at hand is.) During which all the sports players get into position in slow-mo, too.

Pigman II

L31mr0d wrote: »

the obligatory love interest in action movies. Why do they do it?

Because they're tryna pick up some of those date-dollars that are floating around and generally appeal to a larger market.

Plus it makes sense to the storyline. Deep down men (even superpowered ones) only do anything in life for pussy.

faceman

Where to begin with this one!!

Scary children - enough already!!!
Stealth traffic - enough already!!!
Muscles - how come everyone has bulging muscles, except "funny" characters??
Mobile phones never work in the movies when you need them
Exposition - its getting too much
Bad guys/monsters can break into your house without making a sound yet find it difficult to remain still when hiding in your wardrobe thus making noise.
Credit cards can open a locked door at ease

Of course the ultimate sin is bad continuity.

Nolanger

• When a character says an unusual word e.g. "Jacobite" and then explains it for the benefit of the audience.
  
• When a character correctly guesses a computer password in a matter of seconds.
  
• When a character says "excuse me?" when someone says something unexpected to them.
  
• The way the male lead in a romantic comedy always has a fat, slobby, offensive/unshaved male friend as a brother/roommate/friend/workmate.
  
• I also hate it when there's an Irish Film Board logo at the start of the picture because it usually means a bad movie

MCMLXXXIII

Cianos wrote: »

It really pissed me off the way in Juno she was carrying around that litre of sunny delight for the first 5 minutes of the film.

Come on...at least let the film start before you start lashing the products in

I agree with the whole product placement is bad in movies bit, but I think the Sunny D was more of a statement than an advertisement. Sunny D has been sold twice in recent years, contains 5% juice, tastes like poop, and had to settle a lawsuit because a girl actually turned orange after drinking too much of it. I think they just wanted to show the personality of the girl more than advertise a 90s blow-away product that just went terribly wrong.

On a separate note, I think instead of commercials on television, to just have continous shows with product placement instead. I pay to see a movie, so don't advertise - my bedroom is free, I understand the need to advertise. I think/hope that traditional adverts are on their way out anyway - I just record my show, wait a few minutes after the show starts and pass through the commercials.

L31mr0d wrote: »

the obligatory love interest in action movies. Why do they do it?

ugh... ^ + 1
They do it so the wives of the men that wanted to see it won't trash-talk the movie to their friends...at least that's what I think...

L31mr0d wrote: »

don't know if its really relevant as I don't go to see any of these movies on principle. But movies that involve some form of competition/sport. It seems Americans have this cookie cut formula for making sports movies and they just rehash it, whether it be race car driving, dancing, football, boxing... etc

The formula seems to always go something like: lead protagonist suffers blow and leaves the competition, years pass and he is called on to either a) compete again or b) train someone that is exactly like him to compete. A series of loses happen, then a sports montage happens for 10 minutes after which he is now a pro at the sport. He competes again but loses for the first 2/3rds of the game, but in the final third makes a miraculous come back and wins, cue slowmo with confetti and the protagonist getting the girl... the end.

lol
I live in the US, and I refuse to see any sport movie at all no matter what. Everyone goes though - as long as A. they play that sport, B. there are hot girls in a cheerleading movie, or C. there are hot guys in a swimming movie.
Everyone already knows how it's going to end, but they still get SO excited during those movies it's ridiculous.

The Artist

some actor or actress picking their noses on films:cool:

calahans

Smart kids - Reason to bring back caning!

Rappers who turn actors (I saw DMX in some action movie - sh*te)

Stone me, cor blimey, diamond geezer brit gangster movies (enough already).

Doctor DooM

faceman wrote: »

Where to begin with this one!!

Scary children - enough already!!!
Stealth traffic - enough already!!!
Muscles - how come everyone has bulging muscles, except "funny" characters??
Mobile phones never work in the movies when you need them
Exposition - its getting too much
Bad guys/monsters can break into your house without making a sound yet find it difficult to remain still when hiding in your wardrobe thus making noise.
Credit cards can open a locked door at ease

Of course the ultimate sin is bad continuity.

Could you explain that?

Sorry, I'll get my coat.

Personally I hate films which take the piss out of their source material. Like Batman and Robin taking the piss out of comic books. The film wouldn't be being made if not for it, show a bit of respect. Video game films too (although those films are always rubbish.)

I hate the way people who play video games in films always wave the sticks around like their idiots and come accross as obsessive shut ins, too.

humanji

MCMLXXXIII wrote: »

I live in the US, and I refuse to see any sport movie at all no matter what.

But without these films we wouldn't have gems like Necessary Roughness, Major League, or Dodgeball, which are the exact same stories but feel free to take the piss out of themselves.

Oh, and there's also the Mighty Ducks. I'll not have a bad word said against it!

SDooM wrote: »

I hate the way people who play video games in films always wave the sticks around like their idiots and come accross as obsessive shut ins, too.

You've obviously never played a Wii then :P

FruitLover

Pretty much bloody anything about any movies involving any kind of 'hacking' (by hacking, I of course mean activating the button marked 'Hack' or whatever on the screen, all the while tapping away randomly at a keyboard while the (fully graphical) operating system flashes up all sorts of nonsensical crap in the background, like spinning 3D DNA strands and eventually a green 'access granted' symbol).

When people say things in an unnatural, unrealistic manner, particularly the commonly-used repetition at the end of a sentence. E.g.: "<insert something here>, Johnny, <insert something here>". People don't talk like that in real life.

cashback wrote: »

Crap gunmen shooting the ground behind their escaping prey...

In a similar vein, I'm sick of the baddies always being worthless shots (despite the fact that their chosen profession would imply frequent use of firearms) while the goodie is always a crack shot, no matter how badly injured (or inexperienced with gun).

Duggy747

Whenever someone is using a computer it HAS to make stupid noises or whenever they do a search on names/fingerprints/mugshots/etc it always has to go "Badadadadadadadadadadadadadadadada......"

Plus corporate/government computers will always have some window open in the background with a list (names, addresses, etc) scrolling WAY too fast for anybody to even read or understand!

I also hate those pointless emotional scenes in action movies for the sake of "character development". Bollox!

Eirebear

FruitLover wrote: »

When people say things in an unnatural, unrealistic manner, particularly the commonly-used repetition at the end of a sentence. E.g.: "<insert something here>, Johnny, <insert something here>". People don't talk like that in real life.

Sometimes they do though fruitlover, sometimes they do....

Pigman II

FruitLover wrote: »

Johnny, <insert something here>

Fruitlover, That made me laugh.

Cianos

MCMLXXXIII wrote: »

I agree with the whole product placement is bad in movies bit, but I think the Sunny D was more of a statement than an advertisement. Sunny D has been sold twice in recent years, contains 5% juice, tastes like poop, and had to settle a lawsuit because a girl actually turned orange after drinking too much of it. I think they just wanted to show the personality of the girl more than advertise a 90s blow-away product that just went terribly wrong.

But who knows all those details about Sunny D? I didn't and I doubt many people do. I don't think it takes that much screen time for the audience to understand that she likes to drink Sunny D and needed to drink a lot of it so she could take a whizz.

And dyou think they would have made this artistic statement even without the cheque from Sunny D?

jor el

Apart from the always crap and never useful to the plot "love interest" in just about every film (even horror films have to have it), I always end up hating anything to do with technology. Computers switch on instantly, no waiting time. The OS is never a real one. Progress bars, when copying files, will take up the entire screen. "PrintScreen" prints to a printer. Theme Park World is actually UNIX. Everyone uses "GOD" as a password. And so on. Why can't they just use a real computer?

Eirebear

Strange how the only place where product placement would seem ok by most of our posters here, is if it was a computer?

Creature

When a film spoonfeeds the audiences pieces of the plot by having a character speak things they should be thinking. I know this usually only really happens in films by Michael Bay or those starring Ben Affleck where thinking about the plot is frowned upon but it's very sloppy and annoying nonetheless. It's even worse when the character is alone.

Sherifu

Impossible stunts; Transporter 2 gets a nod here.
Scripts that are bad but not bad enough to laugh at.
Bad accents; Oirish.

L31mr0d

Sherifu wrote: »

Impossible stunts; Transporter 2 gets a nod here.

wha!!! Impossible stunts are excellent. Action movies wouldn't be action movies if they didn't take liberties with reality.

Imagine how amazing the car chase scene in The Bourne Identity would of been if they made that chase "possible". Bourne would of taken the first hard left and the car would of cut out.

It's the imaginary and impossible that make action movies great. I personally loved Transporter 2. Basically anything Jason Statham touchs is gold in my books.

Sherifu

L31mr0d wrote: »

It's the imaginary and impossible that make action movies great. I personally loved Transporter 2. Basically anything Jason Statham touchs is gold in my books.

The stunt where he scrapes the bomb off the car with the crane hook made me cringe.

Karl Hungus

L31mr0d wrote: »

It's the imaginary and impossible that make action movies great. I personally loved Transporter 2. Basically anything Jason Statham touchs is gold in my books.

I don't know about that, The Italian Job remake, and War weren't all that great. Would could infact say they were pretty bad.

The Artist

can Jason Statham really kick ass in real life or its all mockery?Love watching his films and this

Sherifu posted The stunt where he scrapes the bomb off the car with the crane hook made me cringe.

i tottally agree that.Impossible to do:rolleyes:

Karl Hungus

davey180 wrote: »

can Jason Statham really kick ass in real life or its all mockery?Love watching his films and this

No, supposedly he's quite the martial artist. He does most of his own stunts, or so they'd have you believe. He definitely looks like he'd be able to kick ass in real life.

Relating to exposition and the need to explain everything. I had been watching parts of One Missed Call while I was working. There's a scene where the cop character and some girl who had gone along for the ride are at an Orphanage (or whatever) and want to speak to a child.

The nurse tells them that they can try. So they enter the room and start questioning the child, to which she doesn't reply. So the nurse informs them, "she's hasn't talked since the.. blah blah".

Yes, I think that had been implied by the way you said, "you can try" and the fact that she wasn't speaking.

Another one that confuses me. Why is it that bad guys never think of shooting the cop in the head/leg/arm. It's always the chest where the cop is conveniently wearing their bullet proof vest, after which everyone runs over to check if they're ok, to which the cop replies, "it hurt like hell".

You got shot. Of course it's going to hurt.

The love interests in movies always annoys me. And the sex scenes associated therein. Yes, I have no problem watching people screw like rabbits, but just only a second ago you defused the bomb. I don't think now is the time to get your mickey out!

Just thought of a new one. Why is it that in horror movies, the soon-to-die character always runs up the stairs. Or into a room from which is there no escape. Or gets into a closet where they know they'd be caught. Has nobody ever thought about jumping out a window/going out through the front or back door.

And another, with regard to Juno. How come the movie hadn't explained where she got the money for a 5 litre tub of Sunny D and 3 pregnancy tests from? I know it's exposition again, but the girl was only 16. Where would she get that money from?

monkeyfudge

Cianos wrote: »

And dyou think they would have made this artistic statement even without the cheque from Sunny D?

There was no cheque from Sunny D.

It would have said 'Sunny D' in the script so permission would have had to be sought to use the product in the film and I believe they were a bit reluctant to have their product in a film about teen pregnancy.

Sherifu

davey180 wrote: »

i tottally agree that.Impossible to do:rolleyes:

We shall have to disagree. *rolls eyes in other direction*

L31mr0d

Karl Hungus wrote: »

I don't know about that, The Italian Job remake, and War weren't all that great. Would could infact say they were pretty bad.

I didn't mind the italian job remake, and I thought War actually had some fairly decent scenes in it. It was pretty hammy though by the end. I think if you watched War expecting a Jason Statham movie and not a Jet Li movie then you wouldn't be disappointed.

I'm not saying he hasn't done bad movie, just none of the ones i've seen him in thus far have been bad. They've been entertaining at least.

Karl Hungus

L31mr0d wrote: »

I think if you watched War expecting a Jason Statham movie and not a Jet Li movie then you wouldn't be disappointed.

I did watch it expecting a Jason Statham movie though, he was the reason I watched it in the first place, considering I loved Crank so much.

As for a bad Statham movie... The One. That was a ****storm of a film.

johnny_ultimate

eamon234 wrote: »

when directors use the same actors for every film - Tin Burton take note!

Wouldn't necessarily agree with that. Look at Ingmar Bergman or Woody Allen films. They used the same actors / actresses over and over again (Ingmar: Ingrid Thullin, Gunnar Bjornstadt, Bibi Andersson, Max Von Sydow, Liv Ullman. Woody: Diane Keaton, Mia Farrow, himself) and I think by using them all the time they were actually extremely comfortable with them and were able to tease out some of the most stunning performances around. It is annoying if someone doesn't suit a role (Allen in some cases), but overall a good thing which can make everyone involved a little more at ease with their cast.

Backing up some others made in the thread:
-Product placement, especially when they use the excuse that its in the future so they are making a comment on "consumerism run amuck" or some such nonsense: it is still advertising. If they want to make a statement, they could at least use fictional adverts. Wouldn't necessarily agree with the Juno thing though: find that kind of funny and tounge-in-cheek.

-Stealth transport. Has lost any ability to shock, and its gotten to the point where I was able to say "Oh. Bet you somethings going to hit this car" seconds before the inevitable happened in stuff like Six Feet Under or No Country For Old Men. Its like theres a specific camera angle they have for it.

-Explanatory scenes. Sometimes, the audience will actually understand the moral through subtle cues and the general happenings / characterisation in the film. No need to rub it in with a superfluous last minute monologue. Seems a bit condescending most of the time.

-The ugly girl who takes off her glasses and is suddenly pretty: I actually find this ideology completely offensive. Who the **** cares if shes wearing glasses? Most of the time shes actually more attractive with lenses. The worst manifestation of Hollywood's obsession with looks.

Xios

The face of tom cruise. Really grinds my gears.

The Artist

Xios wrote: »

The face of tom cruise. Really grinds my gears.